tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1985249504652831582024-02-20T21:31:59.963-06:00A Confident HopeSarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.comBlogger55125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-88459471124907520562012-11-14T17:33:00.000-06:002012-11-14T17:33:28.536-06:00Breadcrumbs
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Proverbs 15:4a<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Many healing words have been spoken over me in the last 24
hours.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Today we mark 5 years without our
sweet Audrey here with us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Even for a mama who has submitted herself to what I will
call “total immersion boot camp” in God’s Word and slogged stubbornly through
grief to experience more victory than most ever will--seeing things from Audrey’s
perspective is an uphill battle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My view
of Heaven is (still) too limited.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is
clouded by the things I have seen here on earth and the problems that are yet
unresolved.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Even my best hope is too dim.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I need breadcrumbs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Reminders.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>People to point me toward home. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">My friend Andrea came to visit yesterday.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In town for a funeral and to spend time with
her dying grandmother, she knows all too well the reality of this life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She is one of my favorite friends to spend
time with because she has an eternal perspective that sharpens mine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, when I lose my ability to see the finish
line, she reminds me it is still there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Even though she was exhausted, she would not get on that
plane home to Arizona without bringing me a gift in time for Audrey’s Heavenly
birthday—a beautiful silver James Avery pin depicting the love of mother and
child and a children’s devotional book called <u>Thoughts to Make Your Heart
Sing</u> by Sally Lloyd-Jones, writer of <u>The Jesus Storybook Bible</u>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I surprised even myself when I dissolved into a puddle of
tears and said, “I can’t wait to hold her again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, I’m not sure I can even picture it
anymore.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">That’s what’s wrong.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I just can’t picture it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t
SEE it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have GOT to be able to
envision it, I thought to myself. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">As we chatted into the wee hours, she shared a conversation
she had with her 5-year-old son Dean:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">“Grandma is very sick and is not going to get better,”
Andrea prepared her son.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">“I remember when you went to her 90<sup><span style="font-size: x-small;">th</span></sup> birthday
party last year,” Dean said thoughtfully.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">After a long pause, he continued, “I guess she is not going
to have another birthday, is she?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">“No, she probably won’t,” his mother replied, “But, I think
birthday parties in Heaven are even better than the ones here.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">“Yep.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Dean’s little
mind and heart spun with imagination.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">“Birthday parties in Heaven probably have mini-golf…and
trains…and a carousel…and little boats…and little airplanes to ride, just like
Kiddie Acres.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Andrea, pondering the run-down appearance of the children’s amusement
park (and feeling a bit deflated) replied, “I bet so.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, it probably won’t be as barren or ugly
and would probably have some flowers instead of dead grass.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Without missing a beat, Dean agreed, “Yes, it <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">would</i> probably have lots of beautiful
flowers…like Kauai Mini Golf!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Ladies and gentlemen, the theology of babes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Gets right to the heart of the matter, doesn’t
it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Do you see the obvious difference in the imagery?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Kauai Mini Golf beats the pants off of Austin’s
Kiddie Acres (which, if I remember correctly, was a favorite of Andrea’s
growing up).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Kiddie Acres doesn’t look
the same 30 years later and from a grown-up’s perspective.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Somehow, it is worn and sad.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Our view of Heaven can likewise be dim.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What happens when we restore it a bit?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Adjust the color and brightness?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Add in some lush landscaping and some real joy?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In Heaven, even a place like Kiddie Acres will
be restored to its original brilliance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And,
yes, birthday parties there will rock!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">My conclusion?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Because
what I see <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">here</i> is lacking, my vision
of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">there</i> better not be!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I could use an upgrade from my Kiddie Acres view to the
Kauai Mini Golf view.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Especially today.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">My guess is that you could, too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is your perspective shortsighted and lacking
the grandeur worthy of the place God says He is preparing for those who love
Him?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is your image of Heaven a little
bit disappointing?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sister, there will be
no reason for disappointment once we see what God has planned for us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s a guarantee!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What is drawing your view earthward?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What is robbing you of that more glorious,
pristine vision?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Follow these breadcrumbs with me: The One who created all
things and called them “good” is in the process of restoration.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Imagine with me His shining masterpieces (His
people and His earth) returned to their former glory—free from the stain of unfulfilled
dreams, fear, and sadness and devoid of the evidence of decay.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Clean.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Lush.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Beautiful to behold.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Fun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Exciting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ready to explore.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Comforting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Peaceful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Inviting soul’s rest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Safe.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And,
truly free.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">THIS, my friends, is what awaits us! <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, though the tug of despair in this place
can be strong and though world-weary wear-and-tear abounds, the power of God’s
plan to redeem is stronger yet…holding more sway over my heart now than the
things I have suffered and seen.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">One
day, John knew, Heaven would come down and mend God’s broken world and make it
our true, perfect home once again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">And
he knew, in some mysterious way that would be hard to explain, that everything
was going to be more wonderful for once having been so sad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">And
he knew then that the ending of The Story was going to be so great, it would
make all the sadness and tears and everything seem like just a shadow that is
chased away by the morning sun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">“I’m
on my way,” said Jesus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I’ll be there
soon!”<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">John
came to the end of his book.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But he didn’t
write “The End.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Because, of course,
that’s how stories finish.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(And this one’s
not over yet.)<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">So
instead, he wrote: “Come quickly, Jesus!”<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Which,
perhaps, is really just another way of saying…to be continued.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 5;"> </span></i>From
<u>The Jesus Storybook Bible</u>, by Sally Lloyd-Jones<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Audrey, I can’t wait to see what you see.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am trusting that everything will be more wonderful
for once having been so sad.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Andrea’s reminder of this truth and the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">countless joys I have yet to experience</i> are the breadcrumbs that
will lead me home.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-76970392045839074682012-07-10T10:00:00.001-05:002012-07-10T10:07:01.300-05:00God's Goodness<em>I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. </em> Psalm 27:13<br />
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When's the last time you recognized that God is GOOD? <br />
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It is amazing how an ordinary day becomes extraordinary when we open our eyes to God's goodness. <br />
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This morning Caroline took off for preteen day camp. That left Mary Claire and I to our own devices. It's Tuesday, and there is nothing really earth-shattering on our agenda. Laundry, to be honest. But, that didn't stop us from creating and enjoying beauty.<br />
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It is the simple stuff that makes the gratitude well up in my throat--that alters my reality. A sprig of mint from my garden, a bright red, fresh strawberry, the Scripture on my favorite mug, my baby girl's joy creating recipes from her Princess Tea Party cookbook.</div>
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We will be on to sorting and washing clothes within the hour, but I bet we can find some of God's goodness--even in the laundry room. Searching for it will be fun.<br />
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<br />Life can be dull, repetitious, even monotonous. It can be rocky, stressful, and downright unbearable. It can be predictable or eventful. Either way, His goodness is all around you. </div>
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Where will YOU find it?<br />
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<em>How great is your goodness, which you have stored up for those who fear you, which you bestow in the sight of men on those who take refuge in you.</em> Psalm 31:19<br />
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<em>Give me a sign of your goodness, that my enemies may see it and be put to shame, for you, O Lord, have helped me and comforted me.</em> Psalm 86:17<br />
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<em>How can I repay the Lord for all his goodness to me?</em> Psalm 116:12<br />
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<br /></div>Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-433458892679823612012-07-05T21:46:00.002-05:002012-07-05T21:46:50.876-05:00Fireworks, Freak-Outs, and True Freedom<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">God bless the USA—where we feast on good food, pretty
lights, and loud sounds to celebrate the more intangible things like bounty and
liberty and divine providence over a nation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Hamburgers and fireworks don’t really seem to get at the heart of the
matter, but just like every American family out there, we joined in on the fun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">As you can see, it was a picture-perfect day. Great friends and family. Good times. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The setting of the sun was met with the pounding of feet up
the stairs as young and old rushed to view five different fireworks shows we
could see in the distance from the second story of our home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, for the middle-aged men in our company
in need of the rush of adrenaline, watching from afar brought little
satisfaction.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Enter the leftover bag of
fireworks my husband bought at a roadside stand at New Year’s.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We had only opened the sparklers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>An array of pyrotechnics remained, beckoning
the free and the brave.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I will admit that it is my natural tendency to be the party
pooper when it comes to things like this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>(Picture the mom from “A Christmas Story” chanting, “You’ll shoot your
eye out!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’ll shoot your eye out!)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, as I am maturing, I am learning to let
go more and also not to squash my husband’s need for adventure, risk, and
excitement.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">T</span>he
neighborhood had conspicuously omitted the posting of signs this year that
threatened lifetime imprisonment for setting off fireworks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Everyone noticed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was like a war zone on my street.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Cat’s away…mice will play.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Honestly, I’ve gotten so good at letting go lately that it
hardly occurred to me to be concerned as we led 8 children and 8 adults out the
front door like sheep to the slaughter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>By the time I lugged out the second blanket on which our guests could
rest while viewing the festivities, Bryan, giddy with excitement, was passing
out pop caps to the kids.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All the while,
our next door neighbor and his teenage son had begun to set off some pretty
impressive fireworks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I stuffed down a few fleeting thoughts about my roof catching on fire.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
tuned out the voices in my head… the lady on the local news warning about the
danger of blowing off limbs and my mother’s stories about family fireworks
mishaps.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The fact that I was seated
right next to my parents on the blanket made it harder, but I managed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I knew they secretly disapproved. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, they were quiet, and I suspect they had
also resolved to let go a little and try to have some fun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As I wrestled with these thoughts, I said
only one thing out loud:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“This makes me
a little nervous, but I am going to trust God to protect us.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, with that, I did.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Not two minutes later, my neighbor and his son set off a
doozie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, it malfunctioned.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Instead of shooting up, it shot directly into
my yard--into my crowd of family and friends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It
all happened so quickly, there was hardly time to react.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I felt like I was in an action movie—you know
the scene where a bomb explodes and the cameras turn to slow-motion…the actors
brace themselves, arms in front of faces, and slowly turn away from the blazing
fire, jumping to escape the aftermath?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This
was the scene.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">All I could see was flaming light barreling toward me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The children began screaming and running
toward the house.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I picked up the nearest
kid and yelled, “Get inside, NOW!”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Once
inside, chaos ensued.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Children were
crying hysterically and the older ones were comforting the younger ones.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Parents were trying to figure out what
had just happened.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even though it looked like
instant death, not much injury was to be found.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My friend’s husband was cut up a bit, and my father’s arm was mildly burned.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My mother and one of the
toddlers were complaining of temporary loss of hearing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nothing caught on fire.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Everyone else was unscathed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">My neighbor was mortified.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Otherwise rational and cautious adults, my husband and I were
embarrassed, too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We had all heard the
warnings, but we did it anyway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We knew
we were blessed to be ok.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was a close
call.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, in our best estimation, our
protection had been a miracle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I saw the
explosion coming right at us as we rested on the blankets like sitting
ducks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I swear that the hand of God or
His angels must have pushed the fire away from us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It should have hurt us all.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">As I have been processing this crazy end to an otherwise
peaceful and bountiful Independence Day, several things have come to mind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Specifically, two conversations I have had
with friends in recent days.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One was
with my friend Cindy—the one who was watching Audrey when she died.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Cindy and I rarely talk these days.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No particular reason.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We parted ways a bit after the accident.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will admit this was my choice, due to the
pain we each had that I was not personally strong enough to share with
her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, we have talked and seen each
other since, and we share ties to friends and places.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think of her and pray for her often.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Cindy came to mind this summer after I neglected to pick up
my nephew from vacation bible school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He
is 6.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I promised my sister-in-law, Tricia, I
would bring him home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My plans to be at
VBS changed due to family circumstances, and I informed everyone--but
Tricia.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I completely forgot
Matthew.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It wasn’t malicious.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, once I realized what I had done, I felt
horrible about it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">love</i> my nephew!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How could I <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">forget</i> him?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I was squarely confronted with the reality of my
humanity.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If I could forget a kid, what
else could I accidentally do?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What am I
capable of messing up?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I immediately
thought of Cindy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You can do almost everything
right, and then in an instant, one mental slip, one back gets turned, and your
life is never the same.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">This kind of uncertainty is hard to live with.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Most of the time, we try not to think about
it too hard.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, when you face
questions like these, you are forced to decide what you believe—especially what
you believe about God.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I wrote Cindy again on the day I forgot Matthew.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Our discussion over Facebook included one
particularly astute observation on her part:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“I don’t know why God sometimes has mercy on our incompetence and then
fails other times to bless our vigilance.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Well said.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Neither of us offered
an answer to this sacred query.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I could
take a stab at it, but I would be grasping at the wind.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Fast forward to a conversation I had with a neighbor
at the pool on the 3<sup><span style="font-size: x-small;">rd</span></sup> of July.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The two of us share a tendency toward anxiety, perfectionism, and
striving for control.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We began to
discuss these things, and she asked me, “Do you think that everything is
pre-determined by God?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If so, what good
does it do to pray?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do our prayers
actually do anything to change God’s mind, or does He have everything decided
in advance?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> These are really great questions. Legitimate ones debated at seminaries daily, I'm sure.</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I cannot help but make connections between these three situations (the
fireworks close call, the tragic death of my child, and the philosophical wondering of my neighbor).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is God really in control?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If so, why does He sometimes let really bad
things happen, even when you are doing everything “right”?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, why does He sometimes protect us, even
when we make less than stellar decisions?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>In a world that is this unpredictable (and, truthfully, seemingly
unjust), how do we battle fear?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How do
we avoid freaking out?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The answer to these questions is the delicate, but firm underpinning
of my reality in the aftermath of Audrey’s death.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If I don’t get this one right, I may not be
able to get out of bed tomorrow.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In
situation after situation, I face this conundrum.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is God really trustworthy?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Can I rely on Him?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How careful do I need to be?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How wise?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>How cautious?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How much depends on
me anyway?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, with so many unknowns, how
do I rest?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I might be assuming things, but I think my neighbor is weary of her hyper-vigilance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have been there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think that deep down she desires peace, but
it eludes her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She is just not sure if
she can let go—if she <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">should</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If God’s <em>protection</em> is so elusive, then, it
seems, so is our peace.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If He won’t keep
us safe, then we conclude that we will have to self-protect—or at least die of
stress while trying.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">But, is there another alternative?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I think so. But, it is not for the faint of
heart.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is TRUSTING GOD--for real.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">This is a tough pill for me to
swallow because it means I have to admit my limitations and my fallibility and
my childlike perception of the world compared to the way God sees things.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It means I have to admit I will not figure
things out no matter how long I study and seek and conjecture.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It means I throw my pride into the fire and
allow God to be God.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It means that I
admit to God that I haven’t really been trusting Him even though I said I was—that
it is damn near impossible for me to do without His help.</span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">It involves total surrender.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It
involves ceasing to thrash against the things I don’t understand and cannot
control.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It says, “Thy will be
done.”—and means it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">And, it assumes there is a Keeper of all things who is love
and who will redeem.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One who has a plan
and who cannot be thwarted.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One who
hears our prayers and responds—sometimes standing His ground, sometimes bending
to our pleas because of love, mercy, and grace—but always, always doing what He
wants to do because it is right and good and perfect.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> One who may have everything pre-determined (or may change His mind). What's it to me? </span>One whose ends justify the means.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One who knows more than I do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One who does not have to explain Himself to
me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One who has <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">earned</i> my respect and my submission.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">It involves more than a feeling or a leaning toward
God.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It requires, I believe, an outright
force of our will to choose to honor God with the trust He deserves--because He is holy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is a decision we make—sometimes 100 times
a day.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">God is not surprised by our difficulty releasing our
illusion of control.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> Satan wants equal standing with God, too. Are we really different? We have such a hard time giving God the power (that, ironically, He already has). </span>But, those of us
who really want peace and who really claim to follow Christ will not be allowed
to stay in this place of rebellion.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
believe that at some point, the Holy Spirit will be knocking on the door of our
hearts asking, “Why don’t you trust me?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Don’t you know who I am?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">This is exactly what happened in Job’s case.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He experienced every kind of personal tragedy
known to mankind all at once.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He
“trusted” God at first, but it didn’t take Job long to realize that his trust
in God had not been tested before.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He
had not really had to see what it meant—to see whether he did or not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As he began to question God, many theories as
to why God acted or didn’t act came out in conversation with friends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, the problem with all of those theories
was that they were wrong.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>God said so.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, the funny thing is that when God decided
to respond, He didn’t find it necessary to explain Himself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He did, however, find it necessary to correct
all of the people who were trying to figure Him out and who were grossly
misrepresenting Him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The bottom
line?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>God does what He wants.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He knows more than we do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He has not found that it would be beneficial
to entirely explain Himself to us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe
even if we knew the “why’s”, we still couldn’t accept or understand it all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>God does what brings Himself glory.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Period.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">I can't help but pause and ask myself: </span>Am I ok with this?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Have I
accepted this about my God?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I am comforted that even though God does not feel the need to explain Himself,
He has been gracious to give us many, many examples in Scripture of His
character…many instances of His interactions with His beloved children that
show His power, His compassion, and His love.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And, He has revealed to us His plan for redemption of all of the things
that cause us fear and pain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He sent
Jesus to die in our place—His own son.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And, He has given us time to respond to Him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He will send Jesus back at the right
time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, someday, He will establish
His kingdom on earth and live with us-- and everything will submit to His
authority.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There will be no more tears
or crying or suffering.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The only real path to peace is in accepting what God has
revealed to us, deeming it enough, and choosing to rest in it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is in the bending of the knee—in completely chaining ourselves to God's authority and sovereignty-- that we find true freedom. What a surprising mystery this is!</span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What does this mean for me in real life?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well, Bryan and I cleanly resolved never to
buy roadside fireworks again—or to watch others light them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We didn’t even need to discuss it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> One knowing look, and that was that. </span>We may be done with fireworks, but
what about the next time I let the kids jump on the trampoline or the next time
I change lanes and have to swerve because someone is in my blind spot?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>God may protect us, but He may not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We have experienced the worst loss I can
imagine, and there is no guarantee that we’ve reached our quota of
tragedies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Life is risky.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If we don’t want to be paralyzed—if we want
to really live--we are going to have to choose to accept the unpredictable,
wild nature of our world <em>and of our God</em>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">And, we can do it gladly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>‘Cause
we know how this ends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, between here
and there, we don’t have to be bound by fear.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We can be freak-out free.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So can
you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-28739101581130262602012-04-19T12:05:00.000-05:002012-04-19T13:03:05.945-05:00Prophecy: A Required Course for Christians<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“How unwise and slow
you are to believe in your hearts all that the prophets have spoken!”</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Luke 24:25 (Jesus)</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; tab-stops: 165.75pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">So you’ve got a few hours to
spare…</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What ARE you going to do with yourself??!!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Bubble bath, nap out on the hammock, a cup of hot tea and a
magazine, go for a jog, watch a chick flick?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The possibilities are endless.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">But, why do any of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">those</i>
things when you can study the Bible prophets?!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">(Huh?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">What are you talking about Willis?</i>)</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">When you think of ways to spend your free time, studying the
Bible prophets doesn’t make the cut, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">does
it</i>?!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Not for me, either.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In
the past, if I had ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD, I probably would not have
prioritized studying the more “obscure” books of the Bible.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Especially the prophets. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Why not?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I’ll give you <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">my</i>
excuses.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>See if they match up with
yours.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">#1:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>TOO HARD.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I’ll be honest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For
most of my adult life, I have been less than disciplined about <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">personal</i> Bible study.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You know, the kind where you look things up
for yourself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Where you read the
commentary.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Where you ask people
questions about what you don’t understand.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Where you want to know not only how a passage comforts you but also what
the writer hoped to communicate to his original audience.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The kind of study where context matters.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The kind where you grab on and don’t let go
until you “get it”.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">During those years
when a minute alone was scarce, I frequently thumbed to the Psalms and gospels…the
books I could understand…the ones I had already studied.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With all the fervor of a leisurely stroll, I
would peruse familiar passages, walking by them and casually saying hello.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I conveniently skipped the parts I didn’t understand.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s natural, right?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Ok, I have 5 minutes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Where did I stash that daily devotional book?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Oh, yeah.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s on the back of the toilet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Because I don’t want to waste time…<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That’s efficient, right?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I know why that was my
attitude.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was busy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Someone was always tugging on my sleeve,
calling my name.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s legit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My job was 24/7 for a season.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, there are some books of the Bible that
are very complicated. Ever tried to read through the book of Daniel?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ezekiel?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Isaiah?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s not what you do
between nursing an infant and fixing dinner for the family! <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That stuff takes work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Intention.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And a bit of divine
intervention.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">So why do it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Can’t I
just leave that to the pastor and then show up on Sunday and let him break it
down for me?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">#2:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>NOBODY KNOWS WHAT
IT MEANS ANYWAY.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">If I had a dollar for every time somebody Christian shut
down conversation about a complicated Bible passage by saying, “Well, we will
never know…some things are just mysteries,” I’d be a rich, rich woman.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">This one is also an oldie-but-goodie: “No eye has seen, no
ear has heard what God is preparing for those who love Him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We just won’t know until we get there.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Please, somebody read the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">rest</i> of that passage!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">If I listened to this nonsense, I would assume the case is
closed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No need to study the hard stuff.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>According to these folks, nobody will ever
know what the more challenging parts of the Bible really mean, so why waste my
time?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t really have the time to
spare anyway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Whew!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Dodged a big
one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For a minute there, I thought maybe
I’d actually have to do more than read my devo book while I’m on the potty!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Too bad Jesus thinks my excuses are lame.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He made it very clear how He felt about us
knowing what the prophets say.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He wants
us to be informed about prophecies so that we will be quick to believe in our
hearts when they are fulfilled. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In
Jesus’ school of life, ALL Scripture is a required course, prophecy
included.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hate to break it to you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We are called to do the work.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I discovered that just this week as I was reading a familiar
story in preparation for teaching kindergarten Sunday school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(Cool how the Bible is meaningful for
5-year-olds and adults alike…how it speaks to me over and over in layers…how it
is living and active….how it is NEW all the time.)</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Let’s look at the story, and I’ll tell you what jumped fresh
out of the book of Luke:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Cleopas and another man were walking on the road to
Emmaus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They were discussing all of the
crazy events of the last few days.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All
of Jerusalem was abuzz over Jesus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They
thought He was the Messiah, but then He was arrested and crucified.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A few women reported having seen an angel who
claimed Jesus had risen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, when some
of the disciples went to the tomb to check it out, Jesus wasn’t there—alive OR
dead.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, they were confused.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What was going on?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There were rumors flying all around.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Cleopas and his companion didn’t know what to
believe.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Suddenly, a man appeared on the road with them, seemingly
out of nowhere.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He said that he
overheard them talking anxiously.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He
asked them why.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They said (basically), “Duh.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Have you been under a rock?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Everyone in Jerusalem is going crazy over what
may have happened to Jesus.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">It was the mystery-man’s response that really caught my
eye.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“How
unwise and slow you are to believe in your hearts all that the prophets have
spoken!”</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Luke 24:25 (HCSB)</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">At that, the man began to unfold the Scriptures, explaining
how the prophecies that pertained to the Messiah all pointed to Jesus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, then he reminded them that the
resurrection was exactly what was predicted.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That it perfectly fulfilled what was prophesied.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That it HAD to happen that way.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Suddenly the men “got it”—they understood the Scriptures
(the prophecies) for the first time—and then they recognized the stranger on
the road.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was Jesus!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Notice how the men recognized Jesus only when they
understood the prophecies?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>An
interesting observation, I think.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The question in my mind is this: If Jesus thought the men
were unwise because they were slow to believe the prophets’ messages about His
birth, death, and resurrection, will He also think we are unwise if we are slow
to believe the prophecies about His second coming?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When He comes again, will we even recognize
Him if we are walking on the road with Him?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Now, I have heard many a great sermon that reassures me we
won’t be able to miss Jesus’ second coming, so I don’t want you to go telling
people I said we could miss it altogether if we don’t study the prophets!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am posing the question to make you think…<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We might not miss the actual return of
Christ, but will we miss the signs that it is imminent?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, if so, what will we miss DOING during
that time?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How might that affect the kingdom
of God one way or another?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">If Jesus wanted people to understand Scripture then,
wouldn’t He want us to understand Scripture now?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If He thought prophecy was important then,
wouldn’t he think prophecy is important now?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>What benefit could there be to us being awake, alert, and ready when we
see the things prophesied coming to pass?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">There are a bunch of Biblical prophecies that are still
unfulfilled.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If the ones about Jesus’
first coming came true, won’t the ones about His return also come to pass?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If recognizing the fulfillment of the first
set of prophecies required study and knowledge, won’t recognizing the
fulfillment of the others also require study and knowledge?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">This line of thinking shuts down my familiar excuses.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Too hard.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Can’t understand it anyway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not
true!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Jesus said we don’t understand
because we are slow to believe in our hearts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s not impossible, we just lack faith.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And we are not tenacious enough to put it all together.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We’re lazy!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We want the 5 minute stroll, not the 4 hour marathon.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We want to be fed like baby birds—food that
is already partially digested—instead of having to chew up the gristly meat for
ourselves.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What Scriptures encourage us to become mature in our
knowledge and in our faith?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What
Scriptures support my argument that we cannot skip some books because they are
“incomprehensible”?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What Scriptures support
my argument that Jesus wants us to know what is coming?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If not the day and the hour, at least the
signs?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Among many, these:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">All</i> Scripture is
God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in
righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good
work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>2 Timothy 3:16-17</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">We have a great deal to say about this, and it’s difficult
to explain, since you have become slow to understand.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For though by this time you ought to be
teachers, you need someone to teach you again the basic principles of God’s
revelation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You need milk, not solid
food.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now everyone who lives on milk is
inexperienced with the message about righteousness, because he is an
infant.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But solid food is for the
mature—for those whose senses have been trained to distinguish between good and
evil…Now we want each of you to demonstrate…diligence for the final realization
of your hope so that you won’t become lazy, but imitators of those who inherit
the promises through faith and perseverance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Hebrews 5:11-14, 6:11-12 (Paul, to the Hebrews about maturing and not
backsliding)</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Matthew 24-25, when Jesus answers the question from his
disciples, “Tell us, when will these things happen?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What will be the sign of Your coming and of
the end of the age?” (24:3b)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It takes
Him two whole chapters to tell them what they should be watching for!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">“Blessed is the one who reads and blessed are those who hear
the words of this prophecy and keep what is written in it, because the time is
near!”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Revelation 1:3</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">“Look, I am coming quickly!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Blessed is the one who keeps the prophetic words of this book.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Revelation 22:7, Jesus’ words to John</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">And, the angel’s words to John shortly afterward: “Don’t
seal the prophetic words of this book, because the time is near.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Revelation 22:10<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(Don’t you think if the angel said not to
seal up the book that we might be able to comprehend it…at least at some point
in time?)</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">And, my personal favorite: Daniel 11:32b-33a, speaking of
the time when the antichrist is in power on the earth, “…but the people who
know their God will be strong and take action.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Those who are wise among the people will give understanding to many…”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Jesus chastised the men on the road to Emmaus for being
unwise and slow to believe.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, in
Daniel, we are told that if we choose faith and wisdom, we will be strong, take
action, and give understanding to many at a time when there is chaos and
despair.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We can be the light-bearers in
a world that desperately needs hope.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I want to be a light-bearer, don’t you?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I know it is not easy to study the prophets.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It isn’t easy to study the Bible at all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It can be downright confusing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, we can do it—especially in a country
with so many resources available to us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I encourage you to not be deterred by those who would tell you that
certain parts are not comprehensible or worth your time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The bottom line is that studying Scripture in
its entirety is not really optional.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Remember: Jesus Himself made prophecy a “required course.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Will you do the work?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Will you be quick to believe in your heart all that the prophets have
said?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Lord, help us believe your Word.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All of it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Ultimately, only You have the power to open our eyes to who You really
are and to truth in your Word.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We ask
you to reveal it to us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Light a fire
under us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Make us inquisitive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Create a desire in us to search Scripture and
to spend time studying until we “get it”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Lord, help us not to disregard prophecy or think of it as weird and
incomprehensible!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We humbly ask that you
allow us to be the ones who are privileged to take action and instruct many
should there be a day in our lifetime when that is necessary.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We don’t want to be unwise.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t let the enemy tell us that parts of
your Word are not worth our time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Help
us to take big bites of the real meat as we mature in you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t allow the milk to satisfy us
anymore.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We trust that because your
birth, death, and resurrection were prophesied and fulfilled, ALL of the other
prophecies in Scripture are a sure thing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Help us stay alert so that we can fulfill your purpose for our lives. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Amen.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<strong>READERS: Responses from Redemption Day are still coming. It's not too late if you want to tell me what YOU did to celebrate! In fact, who cares what day you celebrate? If you missed it on the day after Easter, do it today. Tomorrow. Next week. Then, email me your creative way of remembering that Christ will come again at <a href="http://www.aconfidenthope.com/">www.aconfidenthope.com</a>. </strong></div>
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</div>Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-55949631143370014812012-04-07T19:51:00.001-05:002012-04-07T19:53:23.239-05:00Take the Confident Hope Easter Challenge!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGN5-28ElU-zWxnDY7zO8VCgU2TC3ce98WyrS3Dk-7Y_t57K9pInoF6ATTrO_V8hoTe_5ywtS7ZZfhfDff2IAQ_VPgiZiU6Rfl9h2hNhvhLE5qeBaO-gxGLOmjGiYSIeok6GL5j8Whb9oP/s1600/comejesus.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGN5-28ElU-zWxnDY7zO8VCgU2TC3ce98WyrS3Dk-7Y_t57K9pInoF6ATTrO_V8hoTe_5ywtS7ZZfhfDff2IAQ_VPgiZiU6Rfl9h2hNhvhLE5qeBaO-gxGLOmjGiYSIeok6GL5j8Whb9oP/s1600/comejesus.jpg" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">(Read through to get the full story or scroll down to read the Confident Hope Easter Challenge—in bold—to find out how YOU can participate!)</i></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">If Hallmark can do it, so can I.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Create a new holiday, that is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I declare the Monday after Easter “Redemption Day”.</span></i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">We celebrate Jesus’ birth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We celebrate His death and resurrection.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, we don’t celebrate His second coming—the day when He will make all things new.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The day when it is finally finished.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I know…it hasn’t happened yet!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, we have got to keep our eyes on the prize.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We need to offer up to God a sacrifice of praise for <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">what He is going to do</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In these days, thousands of years past the promise of Jesus’ return, we need a way to sustain our hope.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To declare it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To celebrate it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While we are waiting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Expectantly.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Last year at Easter, I posted a story about my daughters’ first experience shopping on the internet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After counting what was in their piggy banks and giving a lesson on the cost of shipping, we let them give it a try.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Each chose a toy and placed their order.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Three long days passed before the package arrived.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Each day waiting saw breathless little girls inquiring, “Is it here yet?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is it here yet?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When it finally came, what joy ensued!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We tore open the box in anticipation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, what we found inside was disappointing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Only one toy came.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, inside the box was a packing slip which read <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“partial shipment.”</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The first waiting period had been so hard.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How could Mary Claire wait another day to receive her toy?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It wasn’t easy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She got very discouraged.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why hadn’t hers come, too?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, her toy did, indeed come.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the end, receiving the toy made her forget about the pain of the waiting.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I like to think of Easter as a partial shipment.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Blasphemy,” you may say.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t want to diminish Easter’s power or import at all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For a Christian, it is simply the happiest day we celebrate—so far…<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Jesus deserves our <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">worship</i> for what He has done!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, I think we are often tempted to see Easter as the end of the story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Scripture says so.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Maybe that is because of these three words: “It is finished.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Undeniably, these are three of the most comforting words ever uttered.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As Jesus breathed His last breath on the cross, He declared this truth: I have finished what I came to do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">What did He mean, though?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What exactly did He come to earth the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">first</i> time to do?</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">It is worth a second thought because this phrase is actually uttered two more times in Scripture in the book of Revelation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t know that until I studied it recently.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, putting all three together really helps to shed light on God’s entire plan of redemption.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">If we look at all three “It is finished”(or “It is done”) phrases, we can see a quick outline of God’s plan for redemption.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And we can quit wondering why, if Easter is such a big deal, are we still living in a world full of bad things?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If I am free and forgiven, why do I still sin and suffer the consequences of sin?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If Jesus conquered death, why do people still die?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why is there still so much pain here?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This is confusing—even for Christians—if we don’t know the rest of the story.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">So let’s look at it ALL this year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Let’s use our wide angle lens to see God’s bigger story.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">“It is finished.” #1—John 19:30 “When He had received the drink, Jesus said, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">‘It is finished.’</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With that, He bowed His head and gave up His spirit.”</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Jesus uttered these words on the cross as He died.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The great work of payment for sin—for everyone and for all time—was completed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">God’s work of mercy was complete.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, when Jesus rose from the dead, we knew everything He said was true.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He was not just some crazy man who claimed to be God.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He was God.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, He chose this seemingly crooked way to make our paths straight.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He chose it because there was no other way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Who has the final word on sin and death?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Jesus does.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The cross and the resurrection say so.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">“It is done.” #2—Revelation 16:16-18.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“So they assembled them at the place called in Hebrew, Armageddon.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then the seventh angel poured out his bowl into the air, and a loud voice came out of the sanctuary from the throne, saying, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">‘It is done!’</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There were flashes of lightning and rumblings of thunder.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And a severe earthquake occurred like no other since man has been on the earth—so great was the quake.”</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">This time, the voice uttering the phrase is God Himself, seated on the throne.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This time, the phrase announces the final execution of God’s judgment before Christ’s second coming.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When this part of John’s prophetic vision comes to pass, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">God’s work of judgment on the earth, the way it is now, will be complete.</i></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Why would this be good news?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Because there needs to be a consequence for the evil that has caused so much pain for God’s people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Because a holy God will not contend with rebellion and sin forever.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Because His balance of mercy and judgment is perfect.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We cannot know the right time or the right balance, and so God has warned us to leave the vengeance to Him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, come it will.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, we will be glad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We need rescue.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Without judgment, Christ’s work on the cross was unnecessary—in vain.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">A friend recently told me he likes to think of God’s mercy and judgment this way: “God would not refuse health care to people just because they are not insured.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, that’s not the way the Bible says it works.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That might sound nice on the outside, but that line of thinking results in this conclusion: Jesus didn’t need to die.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, God won’t punish sin.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not only is that not how it <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">is</i>…If we think of it for a bit, we realize that isn’t really what we <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">want</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We want mercy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, we also want justice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In perfect balance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As only God can execute.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">“It is done.” #3—Revelation 21:5-7.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Then the One seated on the throne said, ‘Look!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am making everything new.’ He also said, ‘Write, because these words are faithful and true.’<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And He said to me, ‘<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">It is done! </i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will give water as a gift to the thirsty from the spring of life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The victor will inherit these things, and I will be his God, and he will be My son.’”</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Again, this is uttered by God Himself, from the throne.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, when this happens, my dear friends, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">God’s work of redemption—of people and of the earth—of all He created—will be complete. </i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Everything—and I do mean everything—that God allowed<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"> </b>to cause us pain will be redeemed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Bought back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The curse will be removed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, God will restore all things to their former glory.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But better!</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Better, you say?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yes!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Many people have inquired, “Why would God have created a world with the potential for sin?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Great question.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe, just maybe, because after we are <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">redeemed </i>from sin<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">, </i>we will have a deeper appreciation for all God has done for us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe it will increase our capacity to worship Him, to have intimacy with Him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe it will increase our joy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe we will remember that from which we have been saved, and we will forever rejoice in the place God has restored with the people God has restored.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Suddenly, Heaven sounds more dynamic and interesting, doesn’t it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe the fact that we don’t think of it this way steals the hope we could have.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe Satan wants it that way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Well, nice try, Satan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You don’t have the wool pulled over my eyes anymore.<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></i>Does anyone else want to truly SEE? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Does anyone else believe that knowing the end of the story (and not just stopping in the middle) will help us to live more fully and more purposefully in the present?</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">This is my personal challenge to you:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Please join me in celebrating “Redemption Day”.</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">On Monday, when you are feeling deflated after your Easter celebration is over…when you are cleaning that massive pile of dishes in the sink, washing the stains out of the smocked Easter clothes, and finding half-chewed jelly beans under your couch cushions…will you choose to re-focus your attention on the “shipment” that is still coming?</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I will be honest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t really know what “Redemption Day” should look like.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t even think this way naturally.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, how do I go about celebrating concepts and events I haven’t yet experienced?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have been fleshing this out over the last few years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As I have learned new truth, I have had to find ways to express it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Change the words I use to describe things.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Change my habits.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Add in new methods of celebrating what I know is true.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">“Redemption Day” is my next personal challenge.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Will you make it YOUR personal challenge, too?</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I am not even sure what I will do to celebrate.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have some ideas.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, I am kind of hoping you will help me figure this out…</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I know you are creative.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have learned lots of new ways to tangibly celebrate Christian Easter (beyond the chocolate bunnies and eggs) because of people just like you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now, we hide an empty egg (for the empty tomb) and give the big prize to the one who finds it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We make resurrection eggs that help tell the Biblical story of Easter with things kids can touch and feel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We bake resurrection rolls that turn out hollow on the inside.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, just this week, a friend of mine posted a picture of a craft she and her kids made: an Easter basket with the word “forgiven” on it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The eggs inside were decorated and labeled by the kids with things for which they have been forgiven (hitting my brother, disobeying, and--my personal favorite—coloring on the floor!).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Great ideas, all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span></span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">With that said, I know if we put our heads together we can DO THIS.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We can create tangible ways to recognize the next part of the story and to teach it to our kids.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">What will YOU do?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am sure you will come up with ways—big or small—corporate or private—of celebrating what God has promised to us.</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Do something—anything—to celebrate “Redemption Day”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then, email me at </span><a href="mailto:aconfidenthope@gmail.com"><span style="color: blue; font-family: Calibri;">aconfidenthope@gmail.com</span></a><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> and let me know what you did.</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">We will be celebrating together in spirit on <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Sunday</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Christ is risen!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Then, with confident hope, join me in rejoicing on <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Monday</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Christ will come again!</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Blessings,</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Sarah<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-33228361465261724982012-04-03T21:49:00.000-05:002012-04-03T21:49:32.271-05:00Brake for Beauty<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ-kgmL4uSLwWVKtRJhz1KRL9PSN5g10HgoMBv9yHdpIKyWCx-P7-X8TdbLvR4623VwEy9unXdWjDfePJ4YcsPBZjhE0C5vJXIzdXC9ffIcQiCfrBpbfK9TeGRE3fW7UmkELPqmrLyWtBL/s1600/bluebonnetcross.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ-kgmL4uSLwWVKtRJhz1KRL9PSN5g10HgoMBv9yHdpIKyWCx-P7-X8TdbLvR4623VwEy9unXdWjDfePJ4YcsPBZjhE0C5vJXIzdXC9ffIcQiCfrBpbfK9TeGRE3fW7UmkELPqmrLyWtBL/s320/bluebonnetcross.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">What crosses your mind when your eyes first behold the morning?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">For me, it’s my to-do list.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t want to admit that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Before I’m steady on my feet--with brush in hand, fixing hair for my girls--I’m already thinking of what’s on my plate for the day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> Prepare</span> breakfast.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Check.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Pack snacks and fill water bottles.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Check.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">And, as I go about my business (or “busy”ness…), I am always thinking.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Gym?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Check.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Dishes?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Check.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Fold laundry?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Check.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Pick up bananas for Bible study?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Check.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Email baby shower hostesses?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Check.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Organize PTA volunteers for the school carnival?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Check.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Maybe I do this because I am afraid I’m going to forget something.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Doesn’t really work, though.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I forget things all the time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There’s a lot to remember.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t keep it all straight.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Today I went to the bank to get dimes for an Easter craft project for my Tween Time Bible study.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The teller and I both had trouble multiplying.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Dimes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In denominations of 10.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">“I need 120 dimes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How many are in a roll?” </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">“$5 worth,” she replied. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">“Ok.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> How many dimes is that? If it is </span>5 dimes per dollar, that’s how many per roll?” I stammered, trying to calculate. (<em>5 dimes per dollar? What?!</em>)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">“I don’t know,” was her reply.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">“Um, well, no, that’s 10 dimes per dollar, so that’s 50 dimes per roll.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, I will need, well, 3 rolls. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yeah, 150 dimes.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">“So, you want $150 worth of dimes?” the teller asked.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">“No…I need 120 dimes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>$12 worth of dimes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>2 rolls and $2 more…”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">You only wish it ended there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It went on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hope no one waiting behind me in line knew me. <em>Or could hear.</em><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was that bad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How embarrassing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How hard is it to get 120 dimes at the bank?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Apparently, you and the teller need to be rocket scientists.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">When you can’t multiply and divide by 10, you should probably sit down and have a snack or something.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Too little energy to the brain!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was comical, really.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had so much on my mind that I couldn’t function.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Definition of insanity: doing the same thing and expecting different results.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The bank debacle proved it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>List-rehearsing just makes me crazy, not more efficient.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">No matter how hard I try, I never get to the bottom of the list.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>An ambitious person (call it optimistic, if you will), I plan more for myself than I can actually accomplish in a day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">What a way to feel defeated!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This is no way to live.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">This week, in my comings and goings, I passed a vast field of wildflowers near my home a million times.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I craned my neck on more than one occasion, taking a brief pause from my mental list-making and list-checking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wondered wistfully why I didn’t just STOP and breathe it all in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Today, there was more to do than I could finish by bedtime.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mr. List was driving me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, he wasn’t a gentlemanly chauffer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He was a mean city bus driver, unhappy about his route, his life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He let me on the bus, but he wasn’t in the mood to make any stops.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Today I refused to be hijacked.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>On my drive home from errand running, the Holy Spirit whispered: Something’s gotta give, Sarah.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">It occurred to me: The focus has been my list.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The focus must be YOU, Lord.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">As I approached that familiar scenery, something inside of me shouted to that mean bus driver, Mr. List.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I want OUT!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I want OFF!”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I almost crashed my minivan into a curb lined with red poppies and bluebonnets.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I braked like a mad woman, almost missing the gravel driveway that provided the only reprieve from the busy street. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Unsure of why or even how I stopped, I exited my door in a cloud of dust I stirred up with my car.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Taking hesitant steps, I emerged into the daylight, fished my iPhone out of my purse, and began furiously taking snapshots.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I couldn’t even see my screen for the bright rays of the sun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had no idea how these pictures were turning out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, I couldn’t help myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I took them in more rapid succession, wanting to capture it all.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a 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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I stood there for a moment absorbing the view.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What lovely serendipity.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In all my passing by, I did not notice the way the barbed wire fence framed the flowers and the field with tiny metal crosses.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I did not see the old mailbox, the gnarly, sprawling oak tree, or the rickety gate…much less the family ranch sign or the glory of an individual bloom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">When I was looking at my list, I had missed so much beauty.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">What have you missed today?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Will you join me and brake for beauty?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Will you linger in the car until that worship song you love is finished?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sing at the top of your lungs, letting the lyrics sink way down deep into your toes?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Who cares if you go into the grocery store 30 seconds later than you planned?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Who cares if a stranger sees you rocking out in your van?</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Will you look long at that pile of laundry on your couch, the crumbs on your counter, the fingerprints on your windows, and buck the knee-jerk reaction that tells you there is more work to be done?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Instead, will you rejoice that children (albeit messy ones!) live at your house?</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Strewn pieces of projects, stray socks, and half-eaten Goldfish are evidence—of life.</span></div><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Will you brake?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Will you drink in the beauty?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">In the big and little things, in the neat and messy things, in the finished and unfinished things, God is all around us.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">“…I challenge you to relinquish the fantasy of an uncluttered world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Accept each day just as it comes, and find Me in the midst of it all…Remember that your ultimate goal is not to control or fix everything around you; it is to keep communing with Me…Do not let your to-do list (written or mental) become an idol directing your life.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>--Sarah Young, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Jesus Calling</i></span></div><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Be on the lookout for my next blog post.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You won’t want to miss it!<o:p></o:p></span></b><br />
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span></b><br />
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Get ready to take the <u>Confident Hope Easter Challenge</u>…<o:p></o:p></span></b>Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-53093138746353100692012-03-28T08:30:00.000-05:002012-03-28T08:30:07.390-05:00Comfort My People<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhG44J2KR_6S-d01aryjxnvVh90e8MNogbH4NIYKeg-lwfJIWLQuGaZ_PhywMxwuk-68zAwEK-nw919A9ry6S9J4hS4QJ7YMsebLqEA26ZxuGkfsu210lHDlWOuKqJ3W2d9QWZwfuR5Q24b/s1600/MCsmile.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhG44J2KR_6S-d01aryjxnvVh90e8MNogbH4NIYKeg-lwfJIWLQuGaZ_PhywMxwuk-68zAwEK-nw919A9ry6S9J4hS4QJ7YMsebLqEA26ZxuGkfsu210lHDlWOuKqJ3W2d9QWZwfuR5Q24b/s320/MCsmile.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">“Shark Girl” finally met her match.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Dr. Shiny Thomas, DDS.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Are you sporting two rows of teeth?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Looking like a great white?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That is no problem for the tiny pediatric dentist with the funny name.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Yesterday, Mary Claire courageously climbed up into Dr. Thomas’ big chair, slipped on cool sunglasses to block the bright light, donned headphones to drown out the strange noises, and strapped on nitrous oxide for good measure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was like a little fighter pilot ready for take-off.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">But, no amount of bravery could account for the offense of the procedure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was just plain uncomfortable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And scary.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, though she tried to breathe deeply and squeezed my hand continuously, she still succumbed to the tears.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">This was a huge ordeal for my 8-year-old.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The eventual victor, she walked out of her own personal war zone with three miniature teeth in a little yellow treasure box.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, that was no consolation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was shell-shocked.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I tried to assure her of her impending wealth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After all, the tooth fairy would have to pay BIG TIME for three teeth!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I tried to lure her to a mommy/daughter lunch complete with all of the things a little girl could dream of: French fries and a chocolate shake.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I held her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I rocked her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Still, she remained weepy and limp.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What was a mother to do?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Finally, from the back seat of the van came a soft, whimpering voice: “I want to go <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">home</i>.”<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">So, home we went.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, on the way, we stopped at the grocery store for macaroni and cheese.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In a box.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Comfort.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In a box.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Over the years, I have tried many times to convince my children that homemade macaroni and cheese is better.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can make it a bunch of ways.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, it has always been one of my favorite foods.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have even re-created my paternal grandmother’s special recipe—the one of my childhood memories.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, alas—my children still prefer the box.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Whatever floats your boat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If Kraft macaroni and cheese can restore the smile I love, then so be it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is a small price to pay for comforting my child.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">That’s more like it, Mary Claire!<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3nPr9K4R60eXT0d5NlKQHKx9QJA9WrNC52lX7L0_qFUDzbGjW3immSjHrDmqtg7h4q_s69kWMJVAOCZkqROHNV4_He3zHnF80Tft6h5VQRyj9qmtUk1KpMj2_KAbfvFgEiuuv-ghdr5iz/s1600/MCmacncheese.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3nPr9K4R60eXT0d5NlKQHKx9QJA9WrNC52lX7L0_qFUDzbGjW3immSjHrDmqtg7h4q_s69kWMJVAOCZkqROHNV4_He3zHnF80Tft6h5VQRyj9qmtUk1KpMj2_KAbfvFgEiuuv-ghdr5iz/s320/MCmacncheese.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">We all need a little comfort now and then.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just a little something familiar to get us through the day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> A </span>little push over that hump.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A little break from the discomfort.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A little reprieve from the pain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Today is Audrey’s 7<sup>th</sup> birthday.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The count stands at: 2 with, 5 without.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">When it comes to the comfort of friends, family, and even total strangers, our cup runneth over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank you to all of you who remember.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To those who still look for ways to encourage, celebrate, and affirm.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Thank you to my niece Ava who, unprompted, asked to include Audrey in the March family birthday celebration…asked to add her name into the Happy Birthday song.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ava, we love the wind chime you made for Audrey’s garden!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We know you spent lots of time painting it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What a pretty addition to our remembering place! </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Ava, who was born the same year as Audrey, is a little girl with an enormously loving heart.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her mommy and daddy are doing a great job teaching her to love and to give and to comfort others.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I cannot wait to see who she becomes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She will do great things for God someday.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She already is!<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Isn’t our God good to give us tangible things like macaroni and cheese, nieces, wind chimes, phone calls from friends, and personal notes to care for us—to comfort us?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These things help us push forward, keep us going.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Here is one of my new tangible comforts... </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjT9u7bzvBoeUY27DSY_-R7Z8qszuwyYl0IRyjSNZu_YewZUZfiYx942SuHXGUHdaoaJjRdv4-l_gQ-ZL1LlocLA5GZYN4v2qiPomBQkL7X-BJ793sqqR-nfbrOCARbtyCisXo4KqKMU7pt/s1600/joyousreunion.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjT9u7bzvBoeUY27DSY_-R7Z8qszuwyYl0IRyjSNZu_YewZUZfiYx942SuHXGUHdaoaJjRdv4-l_gQ-ZL1LlocLA5GZYN4v2qiPomBQkL7X-BJ793sqqR-nfbrOCARbtyCisXo4KqKMU7pt/s320/joyousreunion.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">While my mom and I were out browsing little shops for <em>her </em>birthday, this beautiful statue caught our eye. Our immediate gut reaction was dissolution into tears. My mom promptly picked it up and bought it for me for Audrey's birthday. The artist named it "joyous reunion" and referenced Isaiah 51:10--"...the redeemed of the Lord shall return...And everlasting joy shall be upon their heads..."</span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Things like this do help. They do. Like a bandage for a boo-boo. But, with the big wounds, scars remain. Like Mary Claire, when I face uncertainty, discomfort, and pain, what I really long for is <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">home</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t we all?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Maybe this innate longing is really a yearning for our Heavenly home?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>God made us for a <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">person</i>: Himself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, He also made us for a <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">place</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">He gave us an amazing earthly example of our need for a home: His people and the nation of Israel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>From the beginning of time, He prepared a specific place for His people to live.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A land carved out to meet their needs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He intended for them to take possession of that land and live there forever.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Isaiah prophesied that they would be driven away from that land and into exile by the Babylonians.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, that happened.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, Isaiah also prophesied their return.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The way God would restore them to the place they were made for.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That happened, too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, Isaiah went a step further.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He prophesied a day when God would redeem all of the suffering the Israelites had ever endured.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A Day that would bring the ultimate comfort and restore their home, once and for all.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><sup><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">1</span></sup><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Comfort, comfort my people, <br />
says your God. <br />
<sup>2</sup> Speak tenderly to Jerusalem, <br />
and proclaim to her <br />
that her hard service has been completed, <br />
that her sin has been paid for...<br />
<sup>4</sup> Every valley shall be raised up, <br />
every mountain and hill made low; <br />
the rough ground shall become level, <br />
the rugged places a plain. <br />
<sup>5</sup> And the glory of the LORD will be revealed, <br />
and all mankind together will see it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Isaiah 40:1-2, 4-5a, NIV 1984<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">As believers in Jesus, we have that promise, too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We can be sure that our rough places will become level ground.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We will go <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">home</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What will it be like when the glory of the LORD is revealed?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When all mankind will see it together?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What amazing comfort that will be!<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Until then, a box of mac and cheese (and a great promise) will have to do.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Happy birthday, Audrey.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I bet they have amazing birthday cake in Heaven.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ask Nana to whip you up a good one.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Tell me: What comforts YOU?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How do you comfort others?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> Comment. Or, s</span>hare stories and pictures via email at <a href="mailto:aconfidenthope@gmail.com"><span style="color: blue;">aconfidenthope@gmail.com</span></a>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div>Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-69024602315553770022012-01-11T22:46:00.000-06:002012-01-11T22:46:04.721-06:00Prepare<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2Xj3UTg9CPIwGYDfkkim9d8Uyqzvel9Cih4wX0IIt4fgEiLaMOS7zO7orUVL48lw1gynTwrpnY6H9yGQesJpVJeE14Q8MuLmIi1-YDv0tUoxvdJ-LOADOZog4v93LG8XETOtxhaHtEu8I/s1600/be+prepared.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2Xj3UTg9CPIwGYDfkkim9d8Uyqzvel9Cih4wX0IIt4fgEiLaMOS7zO7orUVL48lw1gynTwrpnY6H9yGQesJpVJeE14Q8MuLmIi1-YDv0tUoxvdJ-LOADOZog4v93LG8XETOtxhaHtEu8I/s1600/be+prepared.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">And, we’re off!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I am going to blink, and January is going to be a distant memory!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It really is true what they say: the older you get, the faster the time seems to go.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">This holiday season was, without a doubt, the shortest one I have ever had.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was like “stealth Christmas”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It crept up on me!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was as if I jumped on a runaway train in November and took a wild, wild ride.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As soon as it started, it was over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Poof!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>January.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I was NOT prepared for Christmas this year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not at all. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">That’s why I’ve already marked my 2012 calendar<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">: July 1-- Start Christmas shopping</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">You will think it is too early.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(It’s not.)</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">There’s a 50/50 chance I’ll take my own advice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ok, maybe that’s being optimistic.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m pretty type-A, but those who know me best know I’m not married to my day planner.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m not sure I have always been that way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Something flipped in my brain when I became a stay-at-home mom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That job required flexibility, and for a season, planning didn’t do me a lick of good!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After a while, I decided I actually <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">liked</i> not doing everything by a calendar and a clock.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">To this day, even though my kids are bigger, everything in me resists putting stuff on a calendar.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I like following the Spirit when I wake up and letting Him take me though the day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, alas, I must temper that with real-world practicality.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Some things simply require planning.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Like Christmas…and my friend Shelly’s annual holiday cookie decorating party.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Recognizing the busy nature of the season, Shelly delivered her party invitations this year during the first week of November.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now, that’s determination!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I accepted her invitation joyfully…in the back of my mind thinking “that’s really far away” and “we haven’t even had Thanksgiving yet”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>True to form, I stuck it on my fridge and mentally filed it in the “I’ll deal with that later” category.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">I’ve heard it said</span>: Fail to plan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Plan to fail. And, that is exactly what transpired.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">A few days before the party, I re-read the invitation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Bring cookies and decorating supplies.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With growing frustration, I wondered to myself, “How am I supposed to find the time to make cookie dough and bake cookies this weekend?” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In a stroke of genius, I remembered the ancient sugar cookie dough in my freezer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It had been given to Mary Claire as a birthday present in August, and we had never gotten around to making the cookies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(Yet another procrastination.)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That dough would do just fine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would just need to let it thaw the night before.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">On the morning of Shelly’s party, I awoke and re-read the invitation to double-check the start time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>10 a.m.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(Note that it is usually better to check the start time of a party sooner than the day of…especially when it begins in the morning.)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thinking I had just enough time to bake off those cookies and run the kids through the bathtub, I shuffled to my kitchen, eyes still half-open.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Stumbling to the fridge, I reached in to pull out the dough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was still hard as a rock.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Unfortunately, my heart followed suit!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I lost it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was so tired.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was mid-December.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The kids were already out of school for the holidays.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My house was dirty.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was way behind on my Christmas shopping.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, I was not prepared for this party!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I found myself getting really agitated.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Shamefully, the object of my agitation was actually <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Shelly</i>!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am NOT proud to admit it, but I huffed around the house all morning yelling at my kids to get ready faster so that we could go to the store to purchase cookies and not be late to a party I was increasingly bitter about attending.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Inside, I was mad at my friend for hosting a party that was requiring me to do all of this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Isn’t that ridiculous?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was taking out my frustration over all of MY lack of planning on my friend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What did <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">she</i> do wrong?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Plan a party and invite me to come?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How dare she?!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Come on, Sarah--get a grip!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Once I arrived at the party (at least an hour late), I finally calmed down…and admitted to Shelly (though probably not in this detail) what a stinky attitude I was having that morning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, unfortunately for Shelly, I wasn’t the only one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There were others who either were late or did not show up at all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(Apparently, not only has the RSVP gone the way of the dinosaur, but also keeping your word and arriving on time.)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How rude of us all!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It wasn’t Shelly’s fault.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She planned the party in November, for goodness sake!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We accepted her invitation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Shelly wasn’t to blame for her guests being overcommitted, overstressed—and failing to plan ahead. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I felt so guilty.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And so sad for my friend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was visibly deflated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am lucky that she is a “friend of the heart”—one that you can royally mess up in front of and she won’t drop you like a hot potato.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Needless to say, I left her home that day feeling really humbled.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, rightly so.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I should have been prepared.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Thankfully, God is always faithful to use my weaknesses to teach me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, in the car on the way home, He directed me to the bigger picture.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He spoke softly to my heart about the party He is planning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>About the many who will reject His invitation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>About the many who will feel woefully unprepared for the festivities on that Day.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Like Shelly, God sent His invitations well in advance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Invitations to the Wedding Feast of the Lamb.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Haven’t you heard about it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s going to be the party of the ages!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A lot of work has gone into preparing for this shin-dig!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">everyone</i></b> is invited!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Have you RSVP’d?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Are you coming?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span>Because, on the day of the party, if you are not ready to attend, you won’t be able to blame God for your lack of preparation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> That would be as ridiculous as me blaming Shelly for my not showing up to her party, even though I never answered her invitation or got in my car to drive to her house.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">God is the host, but you still have to get ready to come. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He has graciously incurred all of the costs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is free to you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In fact, He is doing all of the work to get you there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, you have to let Him know you want to come.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">If you <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">are</i> planning to attend, have you stuck the invitation on the fridge?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Did you make a mental note that it is “really far away” and you’ll “deal with it later”?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If so, when party day arrives, will you feel underdressed and unprepared?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I don’t know about you, but I don’t want Jesus to come for me and find me stressed out, overcommitted, sleepy-eyed, and in my pajamas!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t want to be surprised to see Him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I want to anticipate His coming--and <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">prepare</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I’m not suggesting we do as the Mayans do, but maybe this event is one this “fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants” girl needs to put on her calendar.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We may not be able to predict the day and time, but Jesus told us that we would see signs that His coming is near.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, those signs are all around us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe it is time to start getting dressed.</span>Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-19470309494712758622011-12-05T11:07:00.002-06:002012-01-06T09:23:41.197-06:00"Surprise Me"<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><em>How great is the love the Father has <span style="mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">lavished</span> on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>1 John 3:1a<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></em></span></div><br />
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><em>Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Matthew 7:9-12</em></span></span><br />
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<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span></span>December is the stuff of memories.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Somehow, for a time, the world and all of its complicated bigness seem to shrink into the simple things.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, for a brief moment, if we are watchful, we can view life through our children’s eyes.<br />
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</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;">We may not realize it, but we <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">need</i> our children to remind us how we used to “see”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The things of this world have lost their appeal for many grown-ups.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It takes a lot to get us excited and create a sense of wonder in us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We may consider this new “adult” way of seeing <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">wise</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, have we lost the ability to see God in the process?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Have we lost our ability to trust and to be free, to worship and to hope?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I have decided that children have the right idea.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Jesus thought so, too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He told us to be like them!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You know, some things in this world hint at what is to come.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If we haven’t become completely hardened by our pain and our disappointments, experiences here can be seen as a foretaste of the good God has planned.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Seeing” like our children could actually be good for us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, the Christmas season gives us an open door to their world.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I don’t know how, but God has been gracious to let us preserve the magic of Christmas for our children another year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even though our girls are 8 and almost 10, they still live deep within the free world of the imagination.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Where Santa is real.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Where their shelf elf—who Mary Claire stated today is “so cute, he looks just like a toy”—is so much more than a toy!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The place where “Ernie” the Elf is a magical creature who lives at our house for the month, traveling at night from place to place, eating popcorn, and leaving notes that answer questions about the North Pole and its mysteries.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My girls transport me, too, if for a short time, to that place.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, when Bryan and I are up late at night typing notes to our children from their elf, we are children, too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Won’t heaven hold that kind of joy?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Perhaps my favorite aspect of this magical stage of my children’s development is their total trust in good coming their way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They have been so consistently blessed that they now <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">expect</i> good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I tell you, for a mother who has had to break the news of a sibling’s death to her children, this is a tremendous relief!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Despite their pain and loss, by God’s grace, my daughters still expect good things to happen to them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Last week, they compiled their Christmas wish lists.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Call it a greedy exercise if you want, but I saw it differently.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I witnessed two little people who displayed complete confidence that they will receive what they ask for.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think that is beautiful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, this year, I saw a new addition on my oldest daughter’s list.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She took less than a page to write a few of her big wishes, but the last line of her list read: “Surprise me.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I was sitting next to her when she wrote it down.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I questioned her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“You really want to be surprised this year?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With a twinkle in her eye, she smiled at me and said, “Yeah, surprise me.”</span></div><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I have thought about Caroline’s bottom line a lot since then.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Really, it takes maturity to leave the outcome to chance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe she has learned by now that things are not really left to chance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe she knows instead that <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">she can trust the giver</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe she has learned that <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">it is fun to receive things from his heart</i>.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">In this case, when we mention the “giver”, we are talking about Santa.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, you and I know who Santa is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, believe me, “Santa’s” heart toward Caroline is good!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Santa knows Caroline really well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, Santa can usually come up with things that will delight her, appeal to her natural interests, spark her imagination, and speak to her personally.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Santa knows a little about what the next year will hold, too, and he gives accordingly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Now, some people would say that we have deceived our children and contradicted our teachings about God by preserving this myth for so long, but I assert that when they find out Santa’s real identity, they will know this underlying truth: Their parents have loved them with a personal, passionate love and have delighted in giving them good gifts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Isn’t this the heart of our Father God?<o:p></o:p></i></b></span></div><span style="font-family: Calibri;">If this is God’s heart towards us, I have to ask myself a few questions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do I abandon myself so completely to His surprises?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Or, am I so burned by the world that I no longer <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">expect good</i>?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wonder…do I trust the Giver the way Caroline does?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do I give Him a long, long list of my wishes?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Or, do I ask Him to give me what He knows I will like?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What He knows I will need?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Have I discovered how much FUN it is to receive things from His heart?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I am challenging myself to make a new list this year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Oh, I’ve got some wishes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There are some things I want.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>God knows what they are.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, I am not afraid to beg Him for things!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Insist on them because I know they are also the desires of His heart!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, at the end of the day, I want to “see” through the lens of a child.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t want to miss the foretastes of Heaven because of self-protection under the guise of grown-up wisdom (which is really just cynicism).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I want to worship the God who has already won the victory and lives so that I may have <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">abundant</i> life. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">God is my loving Daddy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He is the best giver ever!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He knows what I want.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He knows what I need.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is fun to receive things from His heart. </span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">On this year’s list, my bottom line reads: “Surprise me.”</span></div><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><em>Heavenly Father, you know where my heart has been wounded.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am not so unlike others in this world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We have witnessed some scary things, experienced some loss, seen dreams die, and lived long and hard in a world with sin and death.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We confess that we don’t feel all that free.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We have put away childish things and along with them the hope of your redemption.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We can no longer reasonably expect good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We don’t know how to experience joy fully.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We cannot understand how to trust you because we have been hurt.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In short, we are battle-weary.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>BUT, something in us stirs us to seek you still!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We know there is more!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Help us to see the “magic” all around us and trust you to give us good gifts this Christmas, throughout the year, and until we see you face to face.<o:p></o:p></em></span></span><br />
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</div>Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-77512665661378363682011-11-14T16:12:00.000-06:002011-11-14T16:12:02.975-06:00Soldier On<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYjQFmjTi5tDR7ZIScZ03f-KixzvpubqIxfpCfiQ1-R4QR5SLl02W3hyphenhyphen0uc9heXNsijflonleyMMAFUbTEcE7kn4QMjFyWuY2YZ9ou8MBcRK3DoynZ-cxNO_78vHunZA5EaVl4xyNHsAqX/s1600/audreygrave2.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYjQFmjTi5tDR7ZIScZ03f-KixzvpubqIxfpCfiQ1-R4QR5SLl02W3hyphenhyphen0uc9heXNsijflonleyMMAFUbTEcE7kn4QMjFyWuY2YZ9ou8MBcRK3DoynZ-cxNO_78vHunZA5EaVl4xyNHsAqX/s320/audreygrave2.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I’m standing over my daughter’s grave.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A grief no parent should have to bear.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It has been four years today.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I’m not sure what to think this time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not sure how to feel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Bryan echoes the sentiment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s the same as last time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And it is different.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I focus on the shiny white temporary marker underfoot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Another year and I still haven’t brought myself to make this thing permanent.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The marker wiggles easily on top of the dead grass underneath it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s been a rough summer drought, I think to myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They’ll have to take out some of the bushes in this cemetery.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not sure if all of these majestic trees are gonna make it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Everything dies, I remind myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I sigh and shake my head.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Here…everything dies.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I look around me, graves on every side.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>An expanse of granite slabs topped with bronze plates displaying names—names that matter to someone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Vases full of ugly silk flowers line the rows.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Though they still “bloom”, these flowers, weathered over time, have lost their former glory, too.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Everything decays here.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">And, this whole scene is a rerun for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We’ve <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">been here before</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yet, as time separates me from the trauma of Audrey’s death, I still wonder what I am to make of it all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Will this always feel this way?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How am I to soldier on?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What is the meaning of it all?<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Suddenly, I am compelled in the moment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hate death!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Oh, no, it won’t do this to ME!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With a rush of adrenaline, in a last-ditch effort to fight back against the past, I all but leap into action right there in front of my family and friends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Only an unseen hand holds me back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If I had a shovel, I would dig and dig and dig, and I’d pull her right out of there!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We’d run far away from here, and I’d keep her safe.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">As quickly as the thought occurs to me, it is diffused by rational thought.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For all of the effort of digging and searching and reaching for her, I’d gain nothing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would still come up empty.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In this life.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">So, now what?<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I’ve asked that question before, Lord.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will ask it again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now what?<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I glance again at our humble little marker.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If the wind blew hard enough, that thing might fly away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, I am settled inside.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Truly, I like it more than the ones I see around me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is different.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, not just because it is small and not meant to stay there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(It occurs to me that Audrey is also small and not meant to stay there…)<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">No, there’s more to this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is more in this moment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Don’t miss it!” something inside me screams.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why does that tiny, bright white marker shout loud to me in this silent place?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Because it is the only one in my line of sight that bears a cross and a word of Scripture.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The only thing in that desolate place that screams HOPE.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></i>Without the TRUTH, everything decays and dies and that’s it.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">My mom puts her arm around me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My husband reaches for my hand.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My friends cry and comfort and remember.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My dad stands wistfully and gazes at the grave.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wonder what he’s thinking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe that Audrey used to sidle up to his and mom’s bedside in the morning and whisper, “Mimi, Papa…coffee…” to entice them out. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">My friend says, “Here, hold the baby.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Will that help?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You need a snuggle?” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I rock that precious child as I stand over the place where my daughter’s body was laid.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">And, I am aware.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Tanner is only here instead of there by God’s grace.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I shudder.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He could have died at birth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My friend could have gone with him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Born at 30 weeks, he arrived much too early and under duress.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, the delightful smile on his face today portrays an innocence I want to remember for myself…and one I want to preserve for him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not the kind of innocence that pretends not to see, but the innocence that comes from childlike faith and trust in a perfect, all-knowing God <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">who redeems</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">It occurs to me that this profound thought requires pictorial representation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How do you ask your friend to let you take a picture of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">her</i> baby over <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">your</i> baby’s grave?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Simply, if she is your heart friend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So she squats down and holds Tanner for the snapshot.</span></span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAI4uNAUMie9W0rcpBNQibsgMHBRrypsd4hlmoFdXcL2KAHwiuHlPPYSSB6HpRCLbI-06geb6JEiV5212u4F1iVuPdgBxg6FsI6uR4MSCUDJ3cY73o0u2vCeUT4jntc63HGur0k1FK9l33/s1600/audreygrave.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAI4uNAUMie9W0rcpBNQibsgMHBRrypsd4hlmoFdXcL2KAHwiuHlPPYSSB6HpRCLbI-06geb6JEiV5212u4F1iVuPdgBxg6FsI6uR4MSCUDJ3cY73o0u2vCeUT4jntc63HGur0k1FK9l33/s320/audreygrave.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I look at that baby in that place, and I know. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That is when the answer comes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Now what?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“More work,” God answers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Don’t give up now.”<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">My fellow Sunday school teachers come to mind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They are keeping their grandchildren this week while their children travel to Ethiopia to pick up their adopted son.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not too many months ago, he was on the brink of starvation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, they are partnering with a very brave and loving mama in Africa to give him a better life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, Stone Chera will learn of Jesus…of God’s great love for him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A beautiful picture of sacrifice and rescue and hope.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">And, someday, that boy will have the chance to do “more work” too…until God says enough is enough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, we don’t know when that day will be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, we soldier on.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I am sitting at my computer so entranced in my thoughts that I almost forget the children I still have in my watch care!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I climb in my new van, determined to let music seep into me and breathe life into my soul.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I blast my favorite new song: “We Are” by Kari Jobe.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Maybe if I listen to it louder, I will feel it more profoundly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I raise the volume another notch.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have played it at least a hundred times in the last week, but I can’t seem to stop.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think God is trying to beat it into me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I sing along.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“We are the light of the world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We are a city on a hill.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We are the light of the world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We gotta, we gotta, we gotta let the light shine.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A smile takes over as I belt these words.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, I see a familiar face outside my passenger window.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She is ten.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A picture of innocence facing a complicated world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She is in my weekly Tween Time Bible study.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Carefree, she is riding her bike and beaming.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She is waving at me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, I am energized.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Yes, Lord.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is more work to do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I trust you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will wait for your redemption. No matter how much I hate what has happened here or how many times you have to remind me...because of your light, I will shine until you come.</span></span></div><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><em>"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. <sup>15</sup> Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house." </em>Matthew 5:14-15<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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</div>Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-36928600747479426912011-10-28T15:05:00.001-05:002011-10-28T15:24:41.942-05:00Seasons<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOmMKPIqxKC__phJ18bhYbYBirj7fCmVr8EWeEQR9LWP5JI6iRpoETgkhsw_NpvXOio4-phyphenhypheniFNlU41A1nNUcF96E-37gj1Sb4SPIHw56Rr6Yk4lRHQhPaikyBwZtmXWI9615RGwE7zLkQ/s1600/fourseasons.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOmMKPIqxKC__phJ18bhYbYBirj7fCmVr8EWeEQR9LWP5JI6iRpoETgkhsw_NpvXOio4-phyphenhypheniFNlU41A1nNUcF96E-37gj1Sb4SPIHw56Rr6Yk4lRHQhPaikyBwZtmXWI9615RGwE7zLkQ/s1600/fourseasons.jpg" /></a></div><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Hello, everyone!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Did you wake up this morning (at least in Central Texas) to a chill in the air?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It gives me such a jolt of energy when the weather changes!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is just something joyful about a change of season.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Summer’s carefree pool days and aimless afternoons eventually wear on our sun-kissed skin and our routine-starved souls.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s amazing to me, but even good things can become tiresome things in big doses!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Isn’t God gracious to give us a change now and then?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Isn’t it comforting to know that there truly is a time for every purpose under the heavens?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">As many of you have noticed, I have experienced a “season” of staying out of the cyber-world…as is evidenced by the date of my last post!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think that those of you who are still hanging on and checking my blog now and then deserve an update!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Let me say up front that I am grateful to those who have checked on me and who have encouraged me to get to writing again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have not stopped for a lack of ideas or for a lack of desire.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My hiatus was simply this: I was in a different season for a while.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">As more and more time passed since my last post, I fretted over it a bit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Many had told me that once I started this blog, I had to keep it going or I would lose my readership.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, God reassured me by His Spirit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If it is HIS thing anyway, what difference would time make?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This whole endeavor has been HIS idea, and He is bound to do with it what He wills.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, I am confident that the best thing I could have done was to ride out my life’s seasons with purpose, joy, and peace…all the while hoping that God would bring back the inspiration and the time to write when He saw fit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">I</span> want to let you in on a great little secret: God may push the “pause” button in one area of life for a while, but that only means He has something else for you to do in another area!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When we are turned toward spiritual things, there is never much chance to “stop” entirely!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That is exactly what has happened in my life over the last five months.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Here’s a brief summary…<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">My parents moved here from Dallas in June.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They sold their house in May (it’s a cool story, too)…but they had nowhere to live when they got here!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, in faith, they moved in with our family!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We enjoyed a summer full of Mimi-and-Papa-time and house-hunting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am pleased to report that God provided a home for my parents only two streets away from us!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We spent the summer months helping them remodel the house and prepare to move.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, we helped them move in only a week or so before school started again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was a whirlwind, but it has been fun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">We are only now beginning to adjust to living in the same city (the same neighborhood!)—a privilege we have not had in over 18 years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I love having my parents so close.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Bryan and the kids do, too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now, our visits do not consist of an entire weekend complete with a 3-hour drive up and down I-35.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We get to enjoy day-to-day things (kids’ activities, weeknight dinners, running errands).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We get to worship together on Sundays and share lazy Sunday afternoons.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mom and I are even attending a Bible study together on Revelation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(Look for future posts influenced by this great study!)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We can exercise together, cook holiday meals together, and share more of our lives.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I truly believe that God set aside this summer for our family to adjust to this big change, and I believe it is part of our whole family’s healing process after many years of grief and loss.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>God is fulfilling His promise to us to “give us a new song” (Psalm 40:3), “do a new thing” (Isaiah 43:19), and allow us to see “the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living” (Psalm 27:13).<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">This summer also brought a string of Vacation Bible schools for my girls.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Caroline, in fact, attended 3 different VBS’s with the same curriculum.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I thought she’d get bored, but I think that God had a plan to get some of His truth firmly planted in her mind and heart!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mary Claire, too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just two nights ago, I found MC in her room with her Bible open, all of her own accord.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She called me in to show me how the lyrics from her VBS music CD are “actually in the Bible”!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was so excited that she could look those verses up for herself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, she exclaimed that she needed to take her Bible to school the next day so that she could “memorize it”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I told her that would be an excellent pursuit—the best, in fact.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, I encouraged her to keep after it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She responded, “Why wouldn’t I?!”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Music to my ears.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank you, local churches.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Praise to God’s Holy Spirit who never quits pursuing my kids.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t have to do all the work (in fact, I am kidding myself if I think I have the power to convince them of anything anyway…).<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Our summer VBS circuit also inspired a new passion for me: community evangelism.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Since before Bryan and I had children, we planned to send them to public school one day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Our hope was that we would have the opportunity to be salt and light in the community where we lived, spreading the hope we have to many who do not know the Good News.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That dream sat in the “someday” category for a long time…probably a decade.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, this summer, when we invited one of my daughter’s friends to VBS, I discovered how easy it really was to talk to people about Jesus…how many people are not completely closed off to talking with one real person about their real-life faith.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That positive experience coupled with a successful impromptu Bible study in my living room one evening with my children and some friends’ children inspired me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>God opened my eyes to the need for Bible study for elementary-aged children.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Churches have summer outreaches (VBS) and Sunday school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is little else provided until middle school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, 9-11-year-olds are intelligent, curious, and hungry for truth!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Could I address that need?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What could God do?<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I decided to start a Bible study in my home with Caroline’s friends and classmates.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mary Claire, I determined, wasn’t quite ready.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(She wanted to do the fun activities, but requested we not do the Bible study part! <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Next year, I’ll invite her friends, too!)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Anyway, we emailed a few people and decided to use that same workbook I had tried out with my own kids in my living room (Between: A Journey Through Proverbs, by Vicki Courtney).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I knew I had some friends who would send their kids to my home, so I figured we might gather about 6-8 girls.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, God had other plans!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What started out as a simple idea has turned into something way bigger than me or my little inspiration.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We now have 26 girls enrolled in what we are calling “Tween Time”!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Tween Time meets once a week (still in my home…for a while longer).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We sing songs, memorize Scripture, study the Bible, have snacks, and do crafts and play games together.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We participated in a service project together, took a field trip to Texas Baptist Children’s Home, and hosted a Family Fun Night at the park.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have been unapologetic about the fact that I am a Christian and believe that the Bible is true…and that I intend to teach it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Many of the girls who come attend church and belong to families who profess faith in Christ.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think those families see Tween Time as an opportunity for their girls to learn to take their faith out of Sunday and out into the world they live in from day to day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, many of the girls have families that are unsure about Christianity or who have had negative experiences with churches or Christians specifically.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Still, they are sending their girls to my house.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, many have purchased Bibles for their girls for the first time so that they can use them for our study.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have told these families that I would like to show their girls what it means to be a Christian and teach them what the Bible says so that they can determine for themselves whether or not they think it is true.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They know that we are also learning universal values of friendship and encouragement.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They agree with me that our young girls need solid emotional, spiritual, and social skills to successfully navigate their rapidly changing world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I am quite honestly blown away by what I am seeing in my community.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am so encouraged.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>God is at work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, He multiplies our time, talents, and other resources when we are just willing to jump in and try something.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am learning SO MUCH from this process about what God is doing in the world right now, about myself and my fears and hang-ups, about evangelism…and, that only scratches the surface.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Needless to say, as we have grown, we have had a lot of adjusting to do, so Tween Time has taken up a lot of my time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am building relationships with my neighbors, and they have blessed me tremendously.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Tween Time is merely ONE of the ways my summer season bled right into my fall.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>September brought with it football, and that is kind of important in my household.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Bryan and I joke about how, as college students, we dreamed of the day we could afford season tickets to the Longhorn games.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well, last year (15 years after graduation) was the first year those elusive tickets could squeeze into our budget…and we had our first losing season in a long time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Humble pie, my friends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, we decided to give those Horns another try again this year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We even traveled to Los Angeles with some of our good friends in September to see UT play UCLA in the Rose Bowl.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was a fun and relaxing get-away for Bryan and me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Moving on to October…I think October may go down as one of the busiest and most productive months in Moran family history.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This month, we repaired a car, sold a car, researched and purchased a new car, participated in a family mediation for an entire weekend, traveled for a family wedding, put our whole house through a tech refresh, and Bryan had surgery…IN ADDITION to our “normal”, “everyday” activities.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I feel like I have been hit by a train, but I also feel satisfied.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We got a lot done.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Much of it was fun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some of it was not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, ALL of it was purposeful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>God used this month to free us of some brokenness that has been hanging over our heads for a long, long time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, He also provided some opportunities to move forward on some dreams He has planted in our hearts that we believe will lead toward healing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Let me elaborate…<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Earlier this summer, Bryan came home from church giggling.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Curious, I asked him to let me in on the joke.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Oh, it was just funny,” he said, “I was sitting in Sunday school this morning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Before it began, I pulled out my iPad and started a list.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I named it ‘$*#@ I Don’t Want To Do That I Have To Do.’<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My good friend came and sat next to me, casually looked over my shoulder, and said with a straight face: ‘I need to make one of those lists, too.’”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Well, that $*#@ list (as we have affectionately, if irreverently, come to call it), has been a real blessing to our family in the last few months.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When you face lots of pain at once (some of it as a result of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">falling</i> into a pit--as Beth Moore so aptly states in her book <u>Get Out of That Pit</u>--and some as a result of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">jumping in with both feet</i>), there is a lot of work to do to heal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Bryan and I both had a very long list of unpleasant things we needed to do in order to move through our grief and through our mistakes, and through our pain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We still have some work to do, but I am elated to say that we have made a hefty dent in that list in the last few months.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was like the lightbulb went on for Bryan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think he realized that if he didn’t act on what he knew to be necessary, he might not experience the abundant life Christ had planned for him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, I am so grateful to God that my husband listened and obeyed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His obedience freed ME from that same bondage.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After all, as a married couple, we are one flesh.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">One of those places in our life that was holding us back was a broken relationship with Bryan’s dad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For four years, we have, admittedly, had some serious conflict.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We did our best to deal with it as it brewed, but we were all under a tremendous amount of stress.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As our counselors from Live At Peace Ministries said, “We have never seen a family before who has experienced as much trauma and loss in recent years as yours.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No kidding.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, it was complicated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Add in decades of some unhealthy patterns, differing personalities, suspicion, judgment, and Satan’s craftiness and POOF!: You get brokenness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It took great courage on the parts of 6 different family members to enter into an agreement to spend a weekend hashing things out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All of us Christians, we could not figure out why things had to be this way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, there was a tremendous amount of fear and doubt discouraging us from facing our problems head on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How much more pain could any of us take?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Despite many obstacles, God led us all to a conference table at the airport Hilton for the weekend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was horribly painful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The process was grueling.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, to be honest, I didn’t have high hopes for the outcome until about an hour before it was all over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, God knocked our socks off.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His heart is reconciliation and restoration.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, He can do a lot with willing hearts and obedience…in spite of all of our sin and brokenness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank you to all who prayed for our family as we went through this time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have confidence now for a future serving Christ together and enjoying our families with one another.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am sure I will write more about this later, but it certainly counts as one of the most important parts of this “season” for me…<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Last, but not least, for a few years now Bryan and I have been discussing adding to our family.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Immediately after Audrey died, we felt that we would not ever want more children.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, God’s work in our life has changed our minds and hearts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This decision to open ourselves to whatever God may have in store for us has been a complicated one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Initially, we wanted to make sure that we were not trying to replace Audrey.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That is impossible.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then, there were marital issues to resolve and fight through.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, there was the not-so-small issue of a necessary medical intervention.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After we had three children in three years and I began to have health problems, we got sort of scared of each other.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Prayerfully, we made the decision to have a vasectomy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I still don’t think we did the wrong thing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We were operating on faith—and on all the information we had at the time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, these last few years have changed us tremendously.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A vasectomy reversal would be expensive, though…and invasive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, Bryan, especially, wasn’t very excited about that prospect.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, we waited.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A long time, it seems.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, after about a year of hardly mentioning it at all to each other, Bryan made the appointment to have a consult with a surgeon.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">We met with that surgeon in August (a day after our 13<sup>th</sup> wedding anniversary).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He had what you would consider to be the typical bedside manner of a surgeon…business-like.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He walked into the room, head down, with a laptop in hand.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He did not greet us, shake our hands, or introduce himself to us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I got worried.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, as he “reviewed our file” and began to talk with us, he proved to be more human than he seemed at first.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t think he sees many patients in our situation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It took him a minute to understand that I am the “original” wife and that we already have three children between us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Once he “got it” and he heard of our loss, he began to cry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, the tears were real.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He had to keep apologizing for not being able to collect himself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> W</span>e found out he has a child Audrey’s age.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After he told us about what HE can do, and after WE told HIM what GOD can do, we scheduled a vasectomy reversal for October 24.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With money down, our decision was made.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">When the surgeon greeted me in the waiting room on Monday after the 2 ½ hour procedure, I was preparing myself to get news that I didn’t want to hear.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I told God that if it didn’t work, I would still say He was good and I would still tell people He is in control and has our best in mind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, I begged Him not to require that of me…again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, in His mercy, He did not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The surgery was a success, and the surgeon said it could not have been easier.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I cried tears of relief and great joy…even though I really don’t have any idea what God will do with our crazy decision.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was a leap of faith.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We felt led to go that direction.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I asked God not to let us spend the money if He didn’t want us to do so.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, we still saw that green light telling us to “go”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Only time will tell what this little adventure has been for…<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">As I type, we are four days post-surgery.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Or, I suppose I should give credit where it is due… BRYAN is four days post-surgery!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He is still somewhat immobile, so as I write, he is parked in front of the Play Station.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I took a break for lunch and sat down with him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“You know what is almost as exciting as <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">playing</i> ‘Batman’?” I asked him sarcastically (all the while preparing my rhetorical answer: “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Watching you</i> play ‘Batman’”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, before I could finish, he replied, quite seriously, “<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Being</i> Batman?” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That pretty much sums up my husband.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, it is one of the things I love most about him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He has that childlike quality…that ability to dream, to imagine…and that translates well when it comes to his manhood.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It makes him an excellent dad, a wonderful husband for a type-A like me, and an all-around great person to know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would be honored to go through all this crazy mess with him again…ALL of it…so long as we keep moving toward victory in Jesus!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, by His grace, we are.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Thank you for all of your support in the past, for all of your encouraging emails and Facebook messages.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank you for your patience with me and for still reading after that long break.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Trust me, if you have enjoyed anything I have written so far, there is much more where that came from.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have jotted down about 10 ideas in the last month alone…on napkins, on my phone, on random junk mail….whenever and wherever the inspiration has struck.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, God is NOT done with this blog or our story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Our story is HIS story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, HIS story is wonderful…and creative…and so complicated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How could it ever just stop?!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I hope you will get back in the habit of checking “A Confident Hope.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Tell your friends about it!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, I pray that whatever season you find yourself in, you will find that God is right in the middle of it with <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">great</i> purpose.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Remember: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">He has made everything beautiful in its time.</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ecclesiasties 3:11 a<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">There is a time for everything, <br />
and a season for every activity under the heavens: <o:p></o:p></span></span></i></b></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><sup><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">2</span></span></sup><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> a time to be born and a time to die, <br />
a time to plant and a time to uproot, <br />
<sup>3</sup> a time to kill and a time to heal, <br />
a time to tear down and a time to build, <br />
<sup>4</sup> a time to weep and a time to laugh, <br />
a time to mourn and a time to dance, <br />
<sup>5</sup> a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, <br />
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, <br />
<sup>6</sup> a time to search and a time to give up, <br />
a time to keep and a time to throw away, <br />
<sup>7</sup> a time to tear and a time to mend, <br />
a time to be silent and a time to speak, <br />
<sup>8</sup> a time to love and a time to hate, <br />
a time for war and a time for peace. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><sup><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">9</span></sup><span style="font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> What do workers gain from their toil? <sup>10</sup> I have seen the burden God has laid on the human race. <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><sup>11</sup> <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">He has made everything beautiful in its time.</i></b> He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end. <sup>12</sup> I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. <sup>13</sup> That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God. <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><sup>14</sup> I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that people will fear him. <o:p></o:p></i></b></span></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Ecclesiastes 3:1-14 NIV<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><br />
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</div>Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-83610157611394381852011-05-11T16:02:00.000-05:002011-05-13T15:33:27.750-05:00What Kind of Princess Are You?--A Mother's Day ReflectionWith Mother’s day in the rearview mirror, I am still pondering womanhood. The holiday hit me pretty hard this year. I felt equally sad for our losses and thankful for our blessings. I sobbed over Audrey’s death. Bryan wept over his mother’s death. I opened precious cards from Caroline and Mary Claire and enjoyed their affection. And, we all ate cake! No, we didn’t actually eat cake, but you get what I mean. We grieved and celebrated on the same day. Emotions at both poles can be confusing, to say the least. But, in the deep seat of my soul, beneath the feelings about what I have gained and lost, I sensed an overwhelming desire to BE the woman God made me to be…to figure out what that really means. I want to see with a wise and grateful heart the place from which I have come, the place I am now, and the place I am going. I want to act on things that I will be proud of when my life is said and done. In a word, I guess I am talking about <em>legacy</em>.<br />
<br />
When God made me a woman, what did He intend for me to be? What part of His image do I reflect? What is my purpose? My worth? I have been reflecting on the ways in which my own mom shaped my world view and gave me the skills I still use today. I have contemplated how she is continually influencing who I am becoming. And, I have been asking the tough questions. Lord, how do I convey the value of womanhood to my daughters? Let them know of their great value to You? How do I help them see their role in Your world at this time in history? How do I build their strength to face whatever comes their way?<br />
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As I mull over all these things, my heart is drawn to the Proverbs. Written as a relational guidebook, Proverbs consists of wisdom from a father to a son about how to fear God, respect your parents, and find a good wife. For those of us whose chromosomes are XX, Proverbs 31:10-31 is a familiar passage of Scripture. As Christian women, we often see it as a standard of godly womanhood…and often a tall order we cannot possibly fulfill. But, a quick reading of the passage, or even a thoughtful memorization of it cannot provide the insight we need to understand its intent. For all its familiarity, I think we often miss its true meaning. Proverbs 31 was written as a Hebrew poem, and it is actually a representation of wisdom in female persona. In other words, all of the other advice given in the book of Proverbs is summarized in Proverbs 31—in female form. <br />
<br />
Sometimes we read through what this chick does, and we think, yeah, right! I’m not everybody’s slave. I’m not burning the candle at both ends. I can’t be all those things. But, I think we have the wrong visual image of the woman being depicted. May I present you with the woman I used to see when I read Proverbs 31?<br />
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</div>You guessed it. Cinderella. Before said prince sweeps her off her feet. This woman works her fingers to the bone and endures the harsh words of her mean sisters and stepmother. And, she does it all with the grandest work ethic and the sweetest disposition. All she needs to endure her life of servitude and mistreatment is an occasional song with a couple of adorable mice. She is the original super woman. <br />
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You can imagine my relief when I discovered that my imagery was all wrong. This is the woman I should have been picturing:<br />
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</div>Where in the world did you get that idea, you may ask? None other than the original Hebrew, my sister! Let’s take a look at Proverbs 31:10, shall we? Now, I don’t know what Bible translations you’ve been reading, but all the ones I’ve ever seen look like this: “An excellent (noble, capable, virtuous) wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels.” Ok, I like jewels. I like the idea that I am worth a lot. And, being excellent, capable, and virtuous are all good things. But, did you know that the Hebrew word used here is “Chayil” and that it means <em>strength</em> and <em>might</em>? The same word, used in Judges 6:12 to refer to Gideon, is translated “mighty man of fearless courage” (AMP), “mighty man of valor” (KJV), “mighty hero” (NLT), and “valiant warrior” (NASB). What a far cry from our Cinderella-in-rags view of the Proverbs 31 woman!<br />
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There is an unmistakable military motif in Proverbs 31:10-31. This woman is a fighter! A scrapper! She is fearless and courageous. She is strong. She not only provides for her family, she fights battles on its behalf. She brings them the “rich plunder of a victorious army” all the days of her life (v. 11-12). This is an image I can get behind. It more accurately describes the fierce spirit God has put inside of me.<br />
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There is no doubt. You are a princess, sister. You are a daughter of the King. So, which kind of princess are YOU? Are you the princess-in-rags just waiting to be discovered, or have you gotten in touch with your inner warrior princess? Cause, girl, you’ve got work to do! And, the work you do matters in this world! The strength with which you fight your battles will be your <em>legacy</em>. <br />
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Happy Mother’s Day—to ALL God’s mighty women!<br />
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<strong>To the Warrior Queen:</strong><br />
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</div>Mom, how can I thank you for showing me how to be a strong woman? You are the original warrior princess. You always told me I could do anything, that I was capable. Then, you showed me how. Strength didn’t always mean getting your way. In fact, you most often showed your strength in your willingness to put others first, to love with a fierceness that never lets go. You have shown us all who we truly are by believing the best in us, even when we weren’t there yet. I love watching your faith grow, listening to the things God is teaching you, and walking through this journey together. I’d thank you for raising me if I thought your task was done, but I still call on you to be my mom, and you answer excellently. There is no substitute for your influence. I can only pray that I will honor your commitment to me with my life—may it always be a sweet reminder that the work you have done has consequence. <br />
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I am infinitely excited about sharing this next adventure with you as you “retire” to Austin. We will discover together what God has planned for you and for our whole family as He continues to reveal the “whole truth” to us. Fight on, mighty woman of valor!<br />
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<strong>To My Warrior Princesses:</strong><br />
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</div>Caroline, how I love watching you bloom into the little girl God has made you to be! Helping you with your writing assignment on the back porch last week will go down as one of my favorite moments in time with you. I loved seeing your excitement as we played with the gift of words, twisting them to bring more meaning and life to the story you had stored up in your imagination. I dream that someday we can share this love of writing—maybe even write together for God’s glory-- but most of all, I count on us sharing the love of each other’s company. I refuse to believe that ends at age 13. When you looked at me recently while I sang Mandisa’s “Only the World” with gusto and said, “Mom, you’re a cool mom,” you touched my soul. I can only pray that you will always think so.<br />
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You are a helpful, compassionate, and insightful kid. God has good things planned for you. May you always know that I am your fiercest advocate. I will fight for you. There are many things I wish you did not have to endure that you have already suffered. A younger, less-experienced me would have grieved over that forever. But, as un-motherly as it sounds, I do not wish for you to be sheltered from suffering. For, that would make you a weak woman. Instead, I wish for you to glean every ounce of wisdom from whatever you must endure, that you may be a mighty, mighty warrior princess for the kingdom! And, you will be! May God fill you with a deep sense of purpose and joy throughout your life. May God grant you the desire of your heart since you were four—that you would be able to hear God’s voice.<br />
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</div>Mary Claire, what a delight you are! I caught a glimpse of your warrior spirit last week when you spontaneously decided you were ready to pierce your ears. When you get your mind set on something, you do it, girl! I saw your true beauty in your bravery as you sat with a big grin on your face and giggled nervously with the guns held steadily over both ears. After it was over and a few tears were shed, your crying turned into uproarious laughter. Your next words will never leave me: “Mom, when I do something that I thought wasn’t possible it feels so good.” Yes, it does, child! And, there is no limit to what you can do when your heart is turned toward Jesus! He has made you for a purpose, and I am going to love figuring that out with you. <br />
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You are constantly making me laugh, Mary Claire. Your love for bringing joy to others and for performing dramatically is evident. I can see you acting or singing someday. Whatever you do, you will do it with gusto. Don’t ever lose that sense that you are capable of the impossible. No matter what this life throws at you, fight! You will do big things for God someday. You are already big in our family and big in our hearts.<br />
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</div>Audrey, I cannot wait to do “normal” things with you when I get there. I still hope God lets me raise you…in a perfect place. But, until then, I can’t help but think of Revelation 13:6 when I think of you. It says that the devil opens his mouth to blaspheme God’s name, his dwelling place (Heaven), and those who live in Heaven. That’s the God you see face-to-face, the place you live, and who you are, dear one! I wish I could just be your mommy here, but apparently my new role is to fight the enemy for your honor! There are many here, sweetheart, who do not know Jesus and who don’t believe in Heaven or know what it is like. I promise to fight until many more do. I hope it makes you proud.Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-8890529428750001182011-05-04T12:13:00.000-05:002011-05-04T12:13:12.891-05:00Behind the Curtain<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsnSpcenU9ebmMdD5SZ-WJd8HQB9WDPrzawuOXJHgMpaAydTfyG2magOSI25lkYsZXyKcBXq2_Vbbf-nX4y8gTK9TU8SMR5UlbxGqNon4LiJbHjvNBSotzLsMcpBFF20qO2-iEbD5uUAW1/s1600/behindthecurtain.bmp" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" j8="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsnSpcenU9ebmMdD5SZ-WJd8HQB9WDPrzawuOXJHgMpaAydTfyG2magOSI25lkYsZXyKcBXq2_Vbbf-nX4y8gTK9TU8SMR5UlbxGqNon4LiJbHjvNBSotzLsMcpBFF20qO2-iEbD5uUAW1/s1600/behindthecurtain.bmp" /></a></div>About 5 weeks after Audrey died, Bryan and I traveled to New York City. It was my first trip to the Big Apple. We had planned to go well before the accident occurred. There were a lot of reasons to cancel it altogether. How could I leave Caroline and Mary Claire with someone else? How could I try to have any fun? In hindsight, I am not sure why we made the final decision to go anyway. It was terribly hard to get out of the door. But, we knew we needed the time together, and we didn’t want the devil to win. It may sound silly, but I actually thought if I changed my plans that somehow I would be setting a standard for the rest of my life. I felt like I had to decide right then and there to keep moving even though I didn’t want to breathe anymore. <br />
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That first trip to New York included some really great sights and sounds (like Rockefeller Center at Christmastime), but it was excruciatingly hard. I cried my eyes out at every major landmark and scenic overlook in the Empire State. Everything we did was shrouded in grief. In the end, we were proud of ourselves for going, but it was so sad.<br />
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That was December 2007. This last weekend, Bryan and I made our second trip together to New York City. We met two of our best friends for a spontaneous getaway. I know, it sounds extravagant. It was. Not many people get to do what we just did. I even flew home in the first class cabin. (Bryan travels weekly for work, and there are perks.) <br />
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Knowing how blessed I was to be taking off for the weekend, I anticipated lots of fun this time around. But, I also braced myself as I entered Times Square for the second time and caught a glimpse of the Statue of Liberty for the second time. I wanted so much to replace those wounded memories of our trip following Audrey’s death. But, I wasn’t sure how I would feel. Would I be overcome by that same sadness, conjure up the freshness of the grief?<br />
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I am grateful to say that we successfully made some new memories this weekend without dredging up too many of the old ones. It was great hanging out in such a busy, diverse city with good friends. We laughed a lot and didn’t do too much planning ahead. We took a bus tour, ate lunch in Chinatown, consumed an authentic Reuben at the Jewish delicatessen where part of “When Harry Met Sally” was filmed, browsed FAO Schwartz, shopped in Soho, and saw two fabulous Broadway shows: “Mary Poppins” and “Jersey Boys”.<br />
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One of the highlights of our trip was a unique backstage tour of the set of “How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying”. Lead actors in the musical include Daniel Radcliffe (of Harry Potter fame) and John Laroquette. We didn’t meet those guys, but one of our friends’ old college buddies from Baylor (Chris Hanke) also has a lead role in the musical (which plays through December). He was gracious enough to meet us at the stage door an hour before the show and give us an inside look. What a genuinely nice guy he is! He took us into his personal dressing room and we actually walked onto the stage of the quaint old theatre. <em>Only an hour before show time, we were standing behind the curtain of a real Broadway show!</em> How cool is that?! What a vantage point!<br />
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<em>Behind the curtain</em>. That one phrase really sums up my second trip to New York City. It was as if I saw New York City for the first time this weekend. It is as if I was looking at it from behind the curtain…from a whole new vantage point…with an insider’s look at what was really going on spiritually in one of the heaviest populated cities in the world. In 2007, I was reeling from the most life-changing, earth-shattering, paradigm-shifting event I had ever encountered. All I could see in New York was my own pain and loss. This time, I think I saw into God’s heart a little more. Let me explain.<br />
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While we were sitting at “Mary Poppins”, I felt immense joy as we appreciated the God-given talents of the actors and actresses, dancers, musicians, writers, directors, set designers, and costume designers. The show was innocent and had a heart-warming message. The music was infectious, and the dancing made me want to stand up and join in. The actors and actresses were hilarious. The children who played Jane and Michael Banks performed brilliantly. I was so impressed with the artistry involved in preparing the show. “What a creative God we serve!” I thought. <br />
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I had the same thought the next night as we watched “Jersey Boys”, a musical about Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons. Songs like “Sherry” and “Walk Like a Man” have become such a part of our shared cultural experience. Isn’t God good to give us music to share and enjoy? The actor who played Frankie Valli sounded JUST like Frankie himself. His voice was so pure—out of this world perfect. Who has falsetto like that? Not many people. God gave that man great talent. I’m so glad he shared it with Bryan and me and our friends.<br />
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I could not help but think as we sat in those theatres that Heaven is going to be so awesome! What amazing breadth and depth of creativity and talent our big God has placed in His people. I can just see us singing and dancing and painting and making sets and putting on shows in Heaven. Can’t you? I can see us all sharing with each other what we do best and enjoying what God made in and through us. Pretty cool thought.<br />
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But, seeing New York City from “behind the curtain” also meant that I became keenly aware of the evidence all around me that this world is in need of a Savior. In the midst of the wealth and the entertainment and the food and the creativity and the hard-working New Yorkers (like our newly immigrated 22-year-old pedi-cab driver from Turkmenistan), I saw the dark underbelly of the fallen world. In 2007, we were too sad to tour Ground Zero. I didn’t think I could handle it. This time, with respect and reverence, we observed with our own eyes the devastation of evil. We saw a damaged sculpture blocks and blocks away from the original Twin Towers, and I realized for the first time what it must have been like when a 100 story building collapsed in the middle of such a busy city. I still cannot believe that we were in New York City on the day we finally located Osama Bin Laden. Historic.<br />
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Ground Zero wasn’t the only evidence of the world’s ills in NYC. I saw individual people hurting, living in a lost and broken world. As we walked down the street after a show, I saw so many homeless. Many of them were mentally ill. I also saw trash cans being dumped by garbage collectors in the early morning hours. The side of the trash cans advertised fortune tellers. I saw a poster on a stairway leading to a basement establishment that advertised “Oriental beauties who perform rare love rituals”. I saw people who had too much to drink and didn’t look like they were very happy. I saw people touring the city on vacation, all the while bickering with their family members. I saw an impatient man in a cab yell angrily at a taxi operator to “do his job”, removing any shred of dignity he may have had. I saw a young woman in front of a pizza place talking on the phone crying. And, I witnessed a mother get sick and faint in a restaurant while her husband and son struggled to help her. NYC police, firemen, and EMT’s arrived to assist. They worked on her while her husband held her wobbly head and her son (who appeared to be about 11) sat across the table and cried. The waiter and an officer kept their hands on his shoulder and tried to reassure him. But, he was terrified. Eventually, the mother was whisked away to an ambulance.<br />
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I saw things this time. Really saw things, you know? I wish I didn’t. It was burdensome. But, I did. I saw people this time. Really saw them. I feel like I witnessed life from a whole different vantage point. Some of the things I saw made me want to weep uncontrollably. I felt a sudden sense of urgency and a desire to throw off EVERYTHING that hinders me from seeing things with proper perspective. <br />
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I was telling Bryan later that I was afraid to tell the folks I was with how I was really feeling…what I was really thinking. And, the folks I was with were my husband and two of our best friends in the whole world! It’s no slam to them. They would have understood if I explained it. But, I know they want to escape sometimes and have fun. I don’t want to hinder that. We were on vacation, for goodness sake! I’m also scared people will think I have not healed, that I am wallowing in my grief. But, I know with confidence that this is a healthy new place I’m not going to be able to push past. It’s my new normal. Sometimes I am not sure people are ready for the way my life has changed…on the inside. Sometimes I feel like if I told people what I was really thinking that it would be “too much”…even for other Christians. It can be pretty lonely in here.<br />
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Regardless of my petty fears and my struggles with pride, I cannot willingly shut down the Holy Spirit. I can’t do that. I cannot look at the world the same anymore! God has given me a rare and beautiful look at things from behind the curtain. I can see foretastes of Heaven—the best of God’s creation, everything He called “good”. I can see sin and its devastation—in myself, in others, in our culture. I can see how God is bringing His plan to fruition--how He is actively drawing people to Himself. I can see opportunities all around me to point others to Him. For me, the veil has been lifted between the temporal and the eternal. I SEE things now. (Mary Beth and Steven Curtis: I get it! Maria…I SEE.)<br />
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I am going to do something I haven’t done before: ask for YOUR advice. What do I do with this new way of seeing? What do I do now? I know there may be lots of people reading this and thinking, “What in the world is she talking about?” But, I also know there are many of you who have had your life-altering moment, and now, you, too, SEE. So, what do I do? How do I take my behind-the-scenes look at God’s world and use it for His glory? How do I take my new sense of urgency and turn it away from feeling weird and different and into feeling powerful and vital to the kingdom? (I can kind of answer this for myself…but I would appreciate any commentary…) What do YOU do?<br />
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Thank you to those of you who are sharing my journey…those of you who are walking alongside me, seeing things the way I see them. You lighten my load and make my path brighter. We must encourage each other (all the more as we see the Day approaching.)<br />
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Bryan: Thanks for “getting me”. You know how I love to be understood. I know I am a big mystery to you sometimes, but you do such a good job of making me feel special. I can’t wait to see how our new vantage point affects what we DO from here on out. Let’s get radical! Let’s go all out!<br />
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Kwans: Thank you for going on vacations with Bryan and me. Vacations and other outings that are “fun” for “normal” people bring out my analytical side and make me wonder what God is doing inside of me. Thank you for accepting me just as I am and for walking through grief and transformation with our family. Thank you for working so hard to make me laugh and experience true joy. And, thank you for being willing to look at the stuff other people might want to ignore. Thanks for growing with us.<br />
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Dear God, help me to be less interested in being understood than I am in understanding what you have put me here to do. I know it doesn’t have to look normal to everyone else. Help me not to care what everybody else thinks. (I hope I don’t have to pray that prayer for the rest of my life.) God, I wonder why, when the world advises me to grow a “thicker skin”, do you continue to give me a softer and softer heart? I feel naked sometimes. I’m scared of what I will see, but please keep showing me what is behind the curtain. Then, PUHHHHLEEEEEESE tell me what to do about it while I still have breath.Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-43952609911915887582011-05-01T10:23:00.004-05:002011-05-02T09:35:19.374-05:00Quit Your Flapping<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZ0PwGJTXOui9NQ9sLFZxC8M906pFfGHPnL9gC6GPxBUfj-_fZPspS0fiZhS7omg4qfuxBH57u3GwHt9wHlCKqn-zhNZ5cAtuybLFU_4PBjE88SCI3LWT2NyuInTKMyiAroETKneU2VB4d/s1600/soaring-bald-eagles_111.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" j8="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZ0PwGJTXOui9NQ9sLFZxC8M906pFfGHPnL9gC6GPxBUfj-_fZPspS0fiZhS7omg4qfuxBH57u3GwHt9wHlCKqn-zhNZ5cAtuybLFU_4PBjE88SCI3LWT2NyuInTKMyiAroETKneU2VB4d/s320/soaring-bald-eagles_111.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; </div><div style="text-align: center;"></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength;</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><strong>they shall mount up with wings like eagles;</strong> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Isaiah 40:30-31</div><br />
Ok, so I’ve never seen an eagle up close and personal. But, I have seen hawks. Massive hawks. Wasn’t more than an hour or two after I posted Monday’s blog that I saw them. In our neighborhood, they are a familiar sight. I am intrigued by them. Their sometimes eerie presence also conjures up images of pure freedom. I watched them soaring over roofs, skimming treetops, leaning left and right, gliding slowly lower, almost falling, and then suddenly rising as if by some invisible but powerful force. Surprised, I observed that they were not flapping their wings. Really. Those big birds were traveling large distances, moving up and down, and they were not working at it one bit! I kept watching. An occasional single flap would keep them afloat, but, for the most part, they looked as if they were resting in the sky. I was baffled. <br />
<br />
I have never understood flight. On Thursday, I was waiting at the Austin airport to get on a big plane. My flight was delayed (6 hours!) due to some pretty severe weather on the East coast. Not like I needed another reason to be nervous about putting myself into a tin can and hurtling myself through the air at 30,000 feet. I utterly deplore it. I don’t get it. How does a plane stay in the air? A friend who is an aerospace engineer explained it to me once. I have been to the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum. And, I still don’t get it. It is more accurate to say that I don’t believe it! I am not afraid to die. But, I am absolutely, unequivocally afraid to fall. I don’t like the Tower of Terror at Disney World (why is it fun to pretend you are on a haunted elevator that is broken?). I will be honest. Getting on that plane required an immense amount of <em>trust</em>.<br />
<br />
Have you ever thought for a minute about how very many things in life require our trust? Not only did I have to suspend disbelief that a plane that heavy could get off the ground, but I had to trust that the people who built the plane and who maintain it had done their jobs well. Every time we drive on the highway, we trust that other drivers will stay in their lanes. Last week, I paid an electrician an exorbitant amount of money to fix a short in a breaker. I think he most certainly overcharged me for his 20 minute stint at my house. But, what do I know about the value of an electrician? All I know is that a whole wall of plugs didn’t work, and I didn’t know how to fix it. Have you ever taken your car in for a tune-up? Gotten that long list of things they just “have” to do to your vehicle before you leave? Seen the bill? How do you know they are telling you the truth? I, for one, know I don’t. I have to trust they are getting a fair wage, and I have to trust that when they put new tires on my van they did it right and those very same tires won’t just fall off three miles down the road. <br />
<br />
As I write, I am about to get in a New York City taxi cab and travel back to the Newark airport. Talk about trust! I will be hopping into a car with a strange man I may not share a language with to go to a place with which I am completely unfamiliar. Have you seen how crazy these drivers are?! I am surprised there are not more pedestrian fatalities in NYC. The cab drivers actually speed up when they see someone crossing the street.<br />
<br />
The list goes on. Truth is, life is just one trust exercise after another. We don’t realize it because we are conditioned to go about our business and accept the way things are. Besides, if you think about it too hard, you get paralyzed by fear.<br />
<br />
If my life in the last few years has taught me anything, it is that we are all—each and every one--under the illusion that we have control. We claw for a sense of power because we feel too vulnerable when we realize how very little control we have over our lives. Life’s not all about me and my own success, ability, strength, striving, and plans. I am not the only variable. I have no choice but to trust. <br />
<br />
This makes me uneasy. And, if you are honest, it makes you uneasy, too. I like to know what to expect. I want to have at least a reasonable expectation of what is going to happen. I like to think that if I try harder, work harder, and think harder that it will make a difference. Maybe it will. Maybe it won’t. People are not always trustworthy. Sometimes they make mistakes. Sometimes they cheat you. They are dishonest. They are weak. They cannot see into the future. People are not fully trustworthy. Things are not reliable. They break. They deteriorate. Things are not fully trustworthy.<br />
<br />
So, how do I face my life and its uncertainties? How do I get on the plane, so to speak? <br />
<br />
I can play the game of odds. It is very unlikely that my plane will fall out of the sky. More people die in car accidents. Look how many planes fly every day and get where they are going. <br />
<br />
I can rely on intellect. I can go and interview my engineer friend again and get all the facts about physics…learn about lift…better grasp that it is a good thing for the wings of the plane to flex wildly in the wind so they won’t break.<br />
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I can distract myself. I can play my music, read, doodle, write, do anything and everything not to think about the ugly truth: I am not in control of the plane.<br />
<br />
Or, as my psychiatrist suggested several years ago, I can medicate myself before a flight. I know some people need this, but my doctor suggested it even though I didn’t mention a thing about being scared to fly. She just assumed that since I was on anti-anxiety drugs already I would need more for a flight! She could not have been more wrong. I refused her oh-so-kind offer. Even if I had taken drugs to numb the jitters, I would have been ignoring my inner battle with trust.<br />
<br />
Don’t we all ignore that inner battle with trust? At least sometimes?<br />
<br />
This week a dear friend of mine had another heartbreaking miscarriage. I cannot begin to tell you how sad I am for her to have to walk down this path…again. I love her heart and her courage and her willingness to be shaped by her pain. She is really battling through this experience with authenticity and faith. As we sat having lunch, she told me something interesting about her grief process. Shortly after she became aware that the baby’s heartbeat had stopped, she felt a deep desire to organize her home. She made some real progress over the weekend, sorting her kids’ toys and getting things in order. She felt a great sense of accomplishment after she had put her energy into de-cluttering. It was, as I saw it, a really healthy thing for her to do with herself. But, she told me something that struck me:<br />
<br />
“Admittedly,” she said, “I was reaching for a sense of control. I just wanted to feel like I had power over something.” How honest! And, oh, can I identify! Can’t you?<br />
<br />
Nothing is at all wrong with what my friend did to soothe her pain. She has most certainly addressed her inner battle with trust, time and again. If she hadn’t, she wouldn’t even be aware that her frenzied cleaning was an attempt to control her situation…if even just a little. But, I wonder…How many people spend a LIFETIME doing this kind of self-soothing and never explore the real source of their fear? <em>How many people rely on self-sufficiency, the game of odds, intellect, distraction, or drugs of some kind to dull the ache of vulnerability?</em> I fear that many wounded people are walking around still unaware that they need someone in whom they can place all of their trust—someone 100% trustworthy. <br />
<br />
If life is truly all about trust, then it is ALL about learning to trust God. Not an easy task, my friends…even for a Christ-follower. You see, growing in trust with God is only possible as we grow in intimacy with Him. We must KNOW Him in order to trust Him. There is far too much pain in the world, far too much uncertainty, far too much that is unexplained to place our trust all nilly-willy like in a God we don’t know. So, I have no problem when people say that they don’t believe in or trust God. Of course they don’t. They don’t know Him. I wouldn’t trust Him either. <br />
<br />
But, here’s the thing: I do know Him now. The Bible says He is near to the broken-hearted. It is so true. I have sought Him in my pain, and I have found Him. That is another promise of the Word. Those who seek Him find Him. I will be honest with you. I am not in love with God’s plan for my life. In fact, I hate a lot of what He has allowed. But, He has also given me much to be grateful for…and I cannot ignore that. I am most thankful that I am now confident of His eternal plan for those who love Him. Yes, I know Him…more every day. And, I am learning to trust Him. Psalm 91:4 says that His faithfulness is a shield. I can’t honestly explain the rest of the Psalm, but I do identify with the writer’s understanding that God’s faithfulness is his protection. I can trust God because He is faithful. I still have trouble getting on that plane. And, I don’t like feeling vulnerable any more than the next guy. But, I know now that those other methods of self-protection just don’t work. I have no choice but to trust God.<br />
<br />
If you don’t know God intimately, may I invite you to seek out who He really is? I have found that the God of the Bible is absolutely trustworthy. That doesn’t mean we won’t suffer. ..even more than we already have. But, I believe that God’s plan for us and His great love for us will far outweigh the troubles we see in this life. “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.” (Romans 8:18) As Christians, that is the truth we profess. And, it is the ONLY thing that compensates for our pain. It is the only thing that soothes our vulnerability and conquers our inner battle with trust.<br />
<br />
You see, many people will tell you that the answer lies in being tough and smart. Only the weak need God. Only the stupid believe in Him. On the contrary! I believe with all my heart that the smartest among us…the strongest…are the ones who are the most surrendered. Look again at the eagle (ok, the hawk!). Watch how he soars. He does not grow weary or faint. He relies on the invisible power beneath him. He has quit his flapping.Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-56168458255565017062011-04-25T13:57:00.001-05:002011-04-25T20:49:19.097-05:00A Lifetime of Mondays<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjM-uVfaWMaOR7kkn0DMJUnq5xC6FCdZ1ziLeFTXPl2-Hj_zqlmi6Bybij-FWHs3D3i4wfHdthT3D8MJcaNfNWeob8kpJplX9jauv4wSNhM3mGEQzltWVxbYiBMUaDMmoARaJlc_Sc7FR1s/s1600/waiting2.bmp" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" i8="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjM-uVfaWMaOR7kkn0DMJUnq5xC6FCdZ1ziLeFTXPl2-Hj_zqlmi6Bybij-FWHs3D3i4wfHdthT3D8MJcaNfNWeob8kpJplX9jauv4wSNhM3mGEQzltWVxbYiBMUaDMmoARaJlc_Sc7FR1s/s1600/waiting2.bmp" /></a></div>It took two whole days to prepare for our family Easter gathering. We worked in the yard tirelessly like little ants to make the back porch more beautiful and cleaned like mad to make our home more welcoming. We grocery shopped and cooked and decorated and prepared. It was worth it, for we truly enjoyed our day. Worship was sweet. What day is happier for a Christian than Easter? And, our family time was precious. What is more heartwarming than watching cousins dye eggs, decorate cookies and play together with bunnies in the back yard? Easter Sunday is full of hope and joy and promise.<br />
<br />
But, alas, it is Monday. Today my house lies in the wake of our celebratory feast. Discarded jelly beans and bits of Easter grass are blowing around my back yard. Candy wrappers and mismatched plastic Easter egg halves are strewn across the floor of the girls’ rooms along with their soiled Easter dresses. There are dishes in the sink and leftovers in my fridge that I cannot possibly eat by myself this week. Now, I sit alone in the quiet of a cloudy morning pondering that first Easter “Monday”.<br />
<br />
<em>Friday</em> left the disciples (and all who had hoped Jesus was the Messiah who had come to save Israel) disillusioned. Bereft. Completely desolate. What had happened? Had they been misled? What now?<br />
<br />
<em>Saturday</em> was a day sandwiched in between utter despair and the coming victory. No one understood or believed fully everything Jesus had said would happen. They didn’t expect what was coming next.<br />
<br />
<em>Sunday</em> was full of the most exhilarating joy imaginable. But, for some, it left unanswered questions. Could this possibly be? What does it mean?<br />
<br />
After Jesus’ resurrection, Acts 1:3 says that He, “…presented himself alive to them (the apostles) by many convincing proofs, appearing to them during 40 days and speaking about the kingdom of God.” The four gospels detail some of the different accounts of the interactions of Mary, Mary Magdalene, Peter, Thomas and the other disciples with the risen Christ. Two of the gospels (Mark and Luke) and Acts tell of the ascension.<br />
<br />
And, then there was “<em>Monday</em>”. Since 40 days passed between the resurrection and the ascension, I am not really sure what day of the week it was, but it must have at least <em>felt</em> like a Monday! Just imagine for a moment that you were there. Jesus had taught among your people, showed himself to be a prophet. You thought He might be the Messiah…the king who had come to save your people. Then, He was condemned to die a most gruesome and humiliating death. You questioned everything you had started to believe. Then, two days later He came back to life! He appeared to you and taught you some more. He gave you a task: tell everyone about me! Be my witnesses to the ends of the earth. (Acts 1:8) Oh, and by the way, I’m taking off. Don’t worry, though, I will give you what you need. The Holy Spirit will come to help you. <em>Wait</em> on Him. Stay in the city of Jerusalem until He empowers you. (Luke 24:49) Even though you can’t see me, I will be with you until the end of the age. (Matthew 28:20b) <br />
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Then, as He is taken up to Heaven through the clouds and out of your sight, two men in white clothes tell you that Jesus will come back in the same way you have seen Him go. (Acts 1:11) But, as you go about your days rejoicing and doing what Jesus told you to do, you encounter opposition…persecution. Maybe you even face death for obeying Jesus’ commands. You receive the power of the Holy Spirit to do miraculous and amazing things, but still He does not return. You get up every morning and gaze back into the sky and wonder: Will He really do what He said He would do? When will He come for me? When will He set things straight? <br />
<br />
Figuratively, it is still “Monday” in our world. We live between the ascension and the return of Jesus. And, we wait. We exist in the aftermath of a big celebration. It is the “morning after”, so to speak. We sometimes experience the classic emotional let-down that comes afterward. Sure, I know that Jesus rose again. I am so glad He is alive and active in my day to day affairs. But, I am still <em>waiting</em> on Him! I am empowered by the Holy Spirit to do amazing things as I obey Jesus’ last command (tell others!), but there is unfinished business here that only Jesus himself can accomplish when, like the men in white proclaimed, He comes back in the same way he went into Heaven. And, oh how I hate to <em>wait</em>. <br />
<br />
Don’t you? I don’t know a single person who could truthfully say, “I just LOVE to wait on things!” In our flesh, we are simply not capable of waiting joyfully. Take children, for example. A couple of weeks ago, my girls wanted to try buying toys online. Bryan and I let them, educating them about the added expense of shipping. They paid us cash from their piggy banks for their desired prizes. Caroline ordered a Zhu Zhu Pet Pizza Parlor, and Mary Claire ordered Squinkies. Every day that passed brought the expected questions: “Mom, did our package come yet?” It was SO hard to wait! It only took three days, but it seemed like an eternity to them. <br />
<br />
On the day the box arrived at our door, I picked the girls up from school. They, of course, asked again, “Mom, did our package come yet?” This time, I happily said that it had indeed come and that they could open it as soon as we got home. They ran in the door and ripped open the box, plotting what they would do with their toys once they got their hands on them. But, when we opened the box, only the Zhu Zhu Pizza Parlor was inside. Along with it was a note that read, “Partial shipment”. In other words, Mary Claire’s Squinkies would be arriving in another box on another day. Oh, the tears that were shed! You would not have believed it! “Mom, it’s not fair! It’s never going to come! Never!” It is simply not in our nature to wait.<br />
<br />
We can make light of the tears of a little girl who has everything in the world and can’t wait one more day for a silly toy, but we are not much different. I would venture a guess that almost everyone is waiting on something right this very minute. And, it isn’t easy. We may have worldlier or smaller things we are waiting on, but we also have some really big, important things we long for that we cannot have right now. Waiting has been the theme of April in my world, and maybe that is why this topic is on my heart. I have been called on time and again this month to counsel with people I love who are <em>waiting</em>. ..waiting on the sale of a home and the dream of retirement with family to become a reality… waiting on the birth of a baby who was wanted for 9 years and who was overdue…waiting 8 weeks on the homecoming of a precious preemie from the NICU…waiting on the outcome of a pregnancy that wasn’t going as planned and now waiting on God’s comfort for the devastating loss of miscarriage…and me, waiting to be reunited with my child in Heaven (I may be waiting for a while longer!). <br />
<br />
Yes, we stand in the gap between the ascension and the second coming. And, Lord, we are waiting!! A couple of weeks ago when we were riding in the car on the way to church, a song came on the radio. It was a common worship song. Perhaps you know it. “Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord. We will wait upon the Lord. We will wait upon the Lord.” The song barely got through the chorus before my husband reached over and changed the channel with a grumble. “I hate that song,” he said. “Why?” I asked (wanting to know his heart). “Do you feel like you are waiting on something particular right now?” “Everything,” was his reply.<br />
<br />
I get it. I really do. Sometimes I really detest a praise song that looks to make something simple and trite out of something that is so hard to do in the real world. But, I got to thinking about that song more over the next few days. It is a reference, I believe, to Isaiah 40:31. <br />
<br />
Amplified Bible (AMP)<br />
<br />
But those who wait for the Lord [who expect, look for, and hope in Him] shall change and renew their strength and power; they shall lift their wings and mount up [close to God] as eagles [mount up to the sun]; they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint or become tired.<br />
<br />
The Message (MSG)<br />
<br />
Why would you ever complain, O Jacob, <br />
or, whine, Israel, saying,<br />
"God has lost track of me. <br />
He doesn't care what happens to me"?<br />
Don't you know anything? Haven't you been listening?<br />
God doesn't come and go. God lasts. <br />
He's Creator of all you can see or imagine.<br />
He doesn't get tired out, doesn't pause to catch his breath. <br />
And he knows everything, inside and out.<br />
He energizes those who get tired, <br />
gives fresh strength to dropouts.<br />
For even young people tire and drop out, <br />
young folk in their prime stumble and fall.<br />
But those who wait upon God get fresh strength. <br />
They spread their wings and soar like eagles,<br />
They run and don't get tired, <br />
they walk and don't lag behind. <br />
<br />
I think the main problem with that simple chorus is that the em-PHA-sis is on the wrong syl-LAB-le, if you know what I mean! When we sing the song, the word “wait” is the one that is emphasized. “Strength will rise when we WAIT upon the Lord. We will WAIT upon the Lord.” Yuck! We hate to wait!<br />
<br />
But, I guarantee you that for Isaiah, the emphasis was on the word LORD. In other words, even young men will fall, BUT those who wait upon the LORD will get fresh strength. Fresh strength to wait. Fresh, hopeful expectancy. Fresh eyes to look upon this life and its woes in perspective. Fresh hearts that have the courage and the perseverance to continue looking up into the clouds confidently knowing—knowing that we know that we know--Jesus is coming again! <br />
<br />
Even though it is still Monday, and the bloom is off of the rose…even though the resurrection and Jesus’ promise to return occurred 2000 years ago and we live in the aftermath on the day after the celebratory feast…even though we endure many hardships…even though we must wait, we must never give up hope! <br />
<br />
We must remember that we know the One on whom we wait! And, He is faithful! It won’t be Monday forever. <br />
<br />
In the morning <strong>You</strong> hear my voice, O <strong>Lord</strong>; in the morning I prepare [a prayer, a sacrifice] for <strong>You</strong> and watch and wait [for <strong>You</strong> to speak to my heart]. Psalm 5:3<br />
<br />
Wait and hope for and expect the <strong>Lord</strong>; be brave and of good courage and let your heart be stout and enduring. Yes, wait for and hope for and expect the <strong>Lord</strong>. Psalm 27:14<br />
<br />
Our inner selves wait [earnestly] for the <strong>Lord</strong>; He is our Help and our Shield. Psalm 33:20<br />
<br />
Then [Israel] believed His words [trusting in, relying on them]; they sang His praise. But they hastily forgot His works; they did not [earnestly] wait for His plans [to develop] regarding them, but lusted exceedingly in the wilderness and tempted and tried to restrain God [with their insistent desires] in the desert. Psalm 106:12-14 <br />
<br />
I wait for the <strong>Lord</strong>, I expectantly wait, and in His word do I hope. Psalm 130:5<br />
<br />
And therefore the Lord [earnestly] waits [expecting, looking, and longing] to be gracious to you; and therefore He lifts Himself up, that He may have mercy on you and show loving-kindness to you. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed (happy, fortunate, to be envied) are all those who [earnestly] wait for <strong>Him</strong>, who expect and look and long for <strong>Him</strong> [for His victory, His favor, His love, His peace, His joy, and His matchless, unbroken companionship]! Isaiah 30:18<br />
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But as for me, I will look to the <strong>Lord</strong> and confident in <strong>Him</strong> I will keep watch; I will wait with hope and expectancy for the <strong>God</strong> of my salvation; my <strong>God</strong> will hear me. Micah 7:7<br />
<br />
We know that the whole creation [of irrational creatures] has been moaning together in the pains of labor until now. And not only the creation, but we ourselves too, who have and enjoy the firstfruits of the [Holy] Spirit [a foretaste of the blissful things to come] groan inwardly as we wait for the redemption of our bodies [from sensuality and the grave, which will reveal] our adoption (our manifestation as God's sons). For in [this] hope we were saved. But hope [the object of] which is seen is not hope. For how can one hope for what he already sees? But if we hope for what is still unseen by us, we wait for it with patience and composure. Romans 8:22-25<br />
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**I’d like to give a special shout-out to my new friend Kristi Bothur (via the wonder of the internet ) who was apparently inspired by a very similar thought this week. You can read her article “Stuck in Saturday” at <a href="http://www.gloryandstrength.com/">http://www.gloryandstrength.com/</a>. She also has a new website and ministry to people who have miscarried or lost children in their first year of life. Visit her at <a href="http://www.naomiscircle.weebly.com/">http://www.naomiscircle.weebly.com/</a>. **Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-77833781394999911162011-04-18T14:32:00.000-05:002011-04-18T14:32:22.991-05:00Empty<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4hWAdfsUo_hRrwCOioqI4z0_k4CieEXbW76OGlmrvzC3pRqCB6k_vMt2REdivcOJg7asj1UglGDKCHzwcqqcHDHkTtfFfhaCuc6GlS2ZkgCrZhAi2tuAZe9g-MWfP_BMyu5UYgAu0zUDY/s1600/empty-tomb1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" r6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4hWAdfsUo_hRrwCOioqI4z0_k4CieEXbW76OGlmrvzC3pRqCB6k_vMt2REdivcOJg7asj1UglGDKCHzwcqqcHDHkTtfFfhaCuc6GlS2ZkgCrZhAi2tuAZe9g-MWfP_BMyu5UYgAu0zUDY/s320/empty-tomb1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>A room lovingly prepared for a precious arrival, <br />
Arms that encircled a perfect little frame,<br />
A lap that cradled a quiet, thumb-sucking snuggler,<br />
And hands that reassuringly clung to chubby fingers.<br />
For now, are empty.<br />
<br />
A closet that contained dreamy dresses and bright pink boots,<br />
Shelves that stored treasured reads like Dora’s Bedtime Stories,<br />
And drawers that housed ruffled socks and the mini-est of mini-skirts.<br />
For now, are empty.<br />
<br />
A rocker that cushioned a weary mama who faithfully prayed, <br />
And a bed that peacefully nestled a busy girl after a full day of play.<br />
For now, are empty.<br />
<br />
A car seat where two little arms rose to worship, <br />
One that endured a tiny leg’s rhythmic kicking, <br />
That sacred spot where a tired baby finally dissolved into blissful sleep time & again.<br />
For now, is empty.<br />
<br />
A chair reserved at a table previously set for five,<br />
A fuzzy, mismatched carpet square in a carefree Sunday school classroom,<br />
A toddler-filled doll stroller lovingly pushed through the kitchen by motherly big sisters.<br />
For now, are empty.<br />
<br />
A hallowed place in every family portrait,<br />
The third tier in a stair-step of pure joy. <br />
For now, is empty.<br />
<br />
A baby book meant to chronicle lost teeth and birthdays that never came,<br />
And a memory book meant to pass stories, traditions, and wisdom through generations.<br />
For now, are empty.<br />
<br />
A basket at the Easter egg hunt with cousins,<br />
An orange plastic pumpkin for Halloween’s trick-or-treat,<br />
A monogrammed stocking wistfully hung on the mantle,<br />
And mailboxes that should contain the Christmas card we can’t bring ourselves to send.<br />
For now, are empty.<br />
<br />
An “X” that marks the spot where a miniature ballerina would have danced,<br />
A desk where a kindergartener would have found her name and stored her crayons,<br />
A fold-up chair at some imaginary graduation,<br />
And a pew where the mother of the bride would have shed a different kind of tears.<br />
In this life, are empty.<br />
<br />
And…<br />
<br />
The tomb, <br />
A cold stone cave where God in the flesh once lay buried,<br />
Formerly a place of deep disillusionment and utter despair.<br />
<br />
An empty tomb.<br />
<br />
Oh, glorious empty tomb!<br />
<br />
Now destroying the curse which bound all men,<br />
Now commanding power over death,<br />
Now shouting hope to an empty world!<br />
<br />
Filling arms, hands, and laps.<br />
Filling rockers and beds.<br />
Filling the dinner table and the back seat of the van.<br />
Filling pictures, stockings, and pews.<br />
Fulfilling future dreams.<br />
<br />
Promising to restore it all.<br />
Promising to leave only one more thing empty.<br />
<br />
In the twinkling of an eye…<br />
<br />
A grave.<br />
A modest little grave bathed in tears,<br />
Formerly a place of deep disillusionment and utter despair.<br />
<br />
A grave that has been patiently and confidently waiting,<br />
Will someday be victoriously empty.<br />
<br />
***********************************************************************************<br />
Hallelujah! He is risen!<br />
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Many of you may be sad or lonely or depressed. "How can I celebrate Easter?" you wonder. You're stressed out. Your life is unpredictable. You are suffering. You are grieving. You are disappointed. You are afraid. I get it! This is the battle I face in my own heart and mind constantly. We live in the real world, and things can easily sway us from the truth we profess. I had my cry this morning. Happens every so often. But...take heart! For Christians, Easter is simply the <strong>happiest</strong> day of the year. I pray you will feel it in the tips of your toes--no matter what. Let us not be dismayed. Let us not look at our circumstances or even at our own lifetimes. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus. <br />
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Last week, Mary Claire, looking rather dejected, said to me, "Mom, why hasn't Jesus come back yet? I can bet you He won't be here by Sunday." How honest! She feels like she has been waiting for Him forever! Don't you? But, I told her that we mustn't give up on Him! Until He comes, He has placed us here with great purpose. Every day He delays is another day for people who do not yet trust Him to come to Him and follow. God will not be slow to keep His promise. And, no matter how long we wait, we can be confident that the Jesus who conquered the grave WILL come again!<br />
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As you go through this week, no matter your circumstances, will you join me in preparing your heart for worship? Take some time each day to read your Bible and imagine yourself walking along with Jesus in His last week here on earth. Then, when you wake on Sunday, I pray you will grasp the VICTORY in which you now stand in Christ Jesus--victory over death itself!<br />
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<em>The angel said to the women, “Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus, who was crucified. He is not here; he has risen, just as he said.</em> Matthew 28:5-6a<br />
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<em>But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance. But the day of the Lord will come like a thief. The heavens will disappear with a roar; the elements will be destroyed by fire, and the earth and everything done in it will be laid bare.</em> 2 Peter 3:8-10<br />
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<em>Jesus said, “Very truly I tell you, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be judged but has crossed over from death to life...Do not be amazed at this, for a time is coming when all who are in their graves will hear my voice and come out..." John 5:24, 28</em><br />
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<em>For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage one another with these words.</em> <br />
1 Thessalonians 4:16-18<br />
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<em>And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” </em>Revelation 21:3-4<br />
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Happy Easter, brothers and sisters! Because of the empty tomb, we have confident hope!Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-45379369634575946702011-03-28T11:31:00.000-05:002011-03-28T11:31:47.570-05:00Happy Birthday, Dear Audrey!Happy birthday to my baby! We might as well take a moment to recall the good times. Take a look at some pretty cute pictures of our baby on her first two birthdays:<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiC75w5czkFDjMewsPzyynbPPcUZoBZ21UQowJnLQnY3DcXclgZwUQVbouPfYbsnuzyvJ0VfRE3v56J3cAmF_x8VAsgLQdzHMXdnK2zaXhk4IsuRbVJRqINLDSkPUaCG7GcmzgfdOpl8z8Y/s1600/Audrey1stbirthday.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" r6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiC75w5czkFDjMewsPzyynbPPcUZoBZ21UQowJnLQnY3DcXclgZwUQVbouPfYbsnuzyvJ0VfRE3v56J3cAmF_x8VAsgLQdzHMXdnK2zaXhk4IsuRbVJRqINLDSkPUaCG7GcmzgfdOpl8z8Y/s320/Audrey1stbirthday.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSwCAHIO2SIIZEUAuVTF3FvVMe16Fjl9HFCWKMTuURO1gMY6-I0wSy1bAEqIdOjRYCYJZCZtjlgvpaqTO0CEozn8XSJXLd81ZQGmH7gxoRI7MDrBujzkkLG9Mqy8AV_ppQN85RsIrHli8x/s1600/A2ndbirthdaycandles.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" r6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSwCAHIO2SIIZEUAuVTF3FvVMe16Fjl9HFCWKMTuURO1gMY6-I0wSy1bAEqIdOjRYCYJZCZtjlgvpaqTO0CEozn8XSJXLd81ZQGmH7gxoRI7MDrBujzkkLG9Mqy8AV_ppQN85RsIrHli8x/s320/A2ndbirthdaycandles.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwcs1IrgVL0dAG5XMqZ_je2GFvJd7N5NFYRo1ZrrOLPMfWtnBbC9rjCD_SI9076tm4DgpdtHA1aTZ9mBXSKlkYKl9Z4BlOTKi1ZoUqD3vevwEym1UlgX3aL4i43d1CD9NMKVCbJ3zr1_GZ/s1600/A2ndbirthday.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" r6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwcs1IrgVL0dAG5XMqZ_je2GFvJd7N5NFYRo1ZrrOLPMfWtnBbC9rjCD_SI9076tm4DgpdtHA1aTZ9mBXSKlkYKl9Z4BlOTKi1ZoUqD3vevwEym1UlgX3aL4i43d1CD9NMKVCbJ3zr1_GZ/s320/A2ndbirthday.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">(I don't even remember how she got the black eye!)</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">(See how chilled out we were by baby #3...she wasn't even completely dressed at her own birthday party!)</div><br />
It seems like yesterday that we were baking Audrey’s Easter basket cake when she turned two, and here we are again at another birthday. It’s only the bottom of the second inning (early in the game of living without her), and here is the count: 2 birthdays with and 4 without. Today Audrey would have been six. I always approach major events like birthdays and holidays as if they were like any other day. After all, Audrey has been absent from us <em>all</em> the time for a while now. What makes these “special” days…well… “special”? Even with this practical outlook, something unexpected usually gets me started down the path of grief, and this “special” day was no exception. <br />
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I still teach the Sunday school class full of Audrey’s little cohorts. They are in kindergarten now. They are full of life, learning exponentially, spouting some pretty big spiritual truths, and basically exuding “adorable”. Yesterday we recognized our sweet Ella. She has a birthday this week. Our lead teacher gathered Ella in her arms, put a birthday crown on her head, and we all began to sing. Precious, innocent voices filled the air with joyful noise (and a few silly additions to the birthday song…cha, cha, cha!). Ella will turn six years old on Saturday. As we sang, it seemed that time froze. I watched little Ella, surveyed the length of her legs, looked at the expression on her face, drank her in. How big would Audrey be? What would she look like? I closed my eyes and imagined that we were singing to her, too. She would have been in this tight-knit group, and she would have worn that little birthday crown on her head yesterday, too.<br />
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While Audrey’s absence is obviously devastating and the thought of what-might-have-been weighs on my heart, I also struggle with what to physically <em>do</em> with days like these. At dinner last night, Bryan asked the girls, “Is there anything you would like to do tomorrow for Audrey’s birthday?” There wasn’t much reply, but even if there was, I am not sure I would have heard it. I immediately withdrew from the table and into my own thoughts. Here came that pesky question again. What do I do with the cemetery? While the girls are at school tomorrow, should I go put flowers on her grave? Do I want to? Several times through dinner, Bryan called to me. “Come back to us, Sarah. Where did you go?” I managed to choke down my nachos and snuggle my Caroline, make some conversation. But I was, indeed, lost.<br />
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After we put the girls to bed, the question nagged again. What do I do with the cemetery? I imagined someone casually walking by Audrey’s grave, noticing her birth date on the marker, and wondering, “What kind of parents would not come and put flowers on their daughter’s grave on her birthday?” I know this thought was rather narcissistic. Who is going to walk by today and notice it is Audrey’s birthday? Who would care? Still, these are things that cross my mind. I know some people cannot stay away from the grave of a loved one. They somehow feel closer to their loved one there. Some are opposite. They cannot go because it upsets them. I am 100% in the middle. I am not afraid of it, not put off by it, totally comfortable with it. But, it also holds little meaning to me in this world. I am, quite honestly, baffled by it. Leaving it alone feels wrong—as wrong as walking away from Audrey’s body at the hospital and away from the casket on the day of her burial. A parent does not walk away from her child’s physical body forever. It is unnatural. And, yet, Audrey’s body—for now—no longer needs my care. She is not going to be sad I didn’t come to “visit her”. <em>Is</em> <em>she</em>?<br />
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No matter what we decide about the cemetery, we still have to figure out what to <em>do</em> with the rest of the day. How do we celebrate another birthday for a child who is not present with us? Each year, this challenge seems to grow. Friends and family ask in advance, “Are you going to do anything for Audrey’s birthday?” Patiently, they try to keep their calendars clear just in case we get inspired or really want their presence. But, I am running out of ways to make this day seem positive. I am out of the energy it takes to throw another party, prepare food, come up with a message of hope, and communicate it to adults and children alike. I feel the burden (and the responsibility and the desire) to lead those around me in the grief process, to put a truthful (with a capital T) spin on things, to be the author of this story. But, I am admittedly tired today.<br />
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On Audrey’s third birthday, we planted a garden in our back yard with family and close friends. It was a lovely way to affirm life. We purchased a red bud tree. It has heart-shaped leaves and blooms in March—a reminder that hope springs eternal. <br />
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Here is a picture of the same garden in August of the year we planted it:<br />
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When we moved in March of 2009, our first gathering in our new home was Audrey’s fourth birthday party. We bought helium balloons and gave them to our friends and family to release while we sang “happy birthday”. We attached notes. Everyone wrote a personal message—what they would say to Audrey if they could. We baked a cake and blew out candles. I don't know why, but I cannot find one picture of that gathering. <br />
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In April of that year, we planned a garden for our new yard. It was an attempt to carry our old one with us. Doing it ourselves was hard work, so we solicited the help of some landscapers. We explained what it meant to us, and they were so kind to re-create it for us. Here is a picture of the precious men who completed Audrey’s new garden:<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFU944NtGv88ryQUlhr8-jXRSxnSdBt6Oi9thW3yH8KXPaEjg8KD8puOp9LZ5XdC2bB4IrGdQ1UDbvrz4V8oTal6pL7ImbQXQnQOLDwxH-bkkEixWSTtuYXUn9k2tv8-jfT1Sq_3mN_WNe/s1600/gardennewhouse.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" r6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFU944NtGv88ryQUlhr8-jXRSxnSdBt6Oi9thW3yH8KXPaEjg8KD8puOp9LZ5XdC2bB4IrGdQ1UDbvrz4V8oTal6pL7ImbQXQnQOLDwxH-bkkEixWSTtuYXUn9k2tv8-jfT1Sq_3mN_WNe/s320/gardennewhouse.jpg" width="240" /></a></div><br />
Last year, on Audrey’s fifth birthday, I don’t even remember what we did. I couldn’t muster up the strength to host a party. I do remember that our friends brought us dinner and ate it with us. And, today, it looks like we will be echoing that low-key kind of remembrance. I have some flowers to finish planting in Audrey’s garden. That task will be a good one. I need some time with my Savior. I need to be with the Source, be reminded of the hope I have. I can’t stay strong without Him. In fact, I am NOT STRONG. I may head to the garden center in a bit to refill the bird feeder with cardinal food. It seems we have attracted a pair of cardinals, and I would love to continue to enjoy watching them. <br />
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Later tonight, we are taking the girls to see a movie. I am sure we will find something to stick a birthday candle in as well. Blow it out. Say goodbye to this day and move on with Tuesday, March 29th. That sounds like a relief to me. I know most people won’t read past the first paragraph of this post. Who is brave enough to face their own grief, much less the grief of another? And, I know that I am not offering much encouragement today. You want <em>real</em>? Well, you got it. This is my process, and I have been told people like to see “process”. This, my friends, is what “living out your faith” looks like. It isn’t always pretty. It is jagged and steep and foggy sometimes. And, it is certainly not guided by my own abilities. It is God-led, God-authored, God-grown.<br />
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I don’t know what future birthdays will hold, but it seems that, over time, we are drawing in, keeping it close to home. I think of Mary, who “pondered all these things in her heart”. God knows, I think to myself. No one else knows the depth of what I am feeling, but God knows.<br />
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So, the count stands at 2 with and 4 without. Looks like we are nowhere near the 7th inning stretch. It’s could be a long game, folks….may go into extra innings. Good news is (yes, I always end with the good news...no matter what I am feeling!)...Good news is, the victory’s a guarantee.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJIXOgNv_SYPYGAwHe4J1U-gE-YDMxy2Po4Wy4cT8Q5K3poc7qwm47b9np3qR_LqCT0_f4Ka6ZPdJp6lj8CWsySWXYpuUvBUDgW4IUxDClW8KkIpn8sGtqiqTofTdKHPeSnBlrgYdo-8zQ/s1600/garden3-28-11.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" r6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJIXOgNv_SYPYGAwHe4J1U-gE-YDMxy2Po4Wy4cT8Q5K3poc7qwm47b9np3qR_LqCT0_f4Ka6ZPdJp6lj8CWsySWXYpuUvBUDgW4IUxDClW8KkIpn8sGtqiqTofTdKHPeSnBlrgYdo-8zQ/s320/garden3-28-11.jpg" width="240" /></a></div><br />
Thank you all for the messages pounding my inbox today. Many of you have been faithful to remember, and that means the world to us. When you think of us, don't forget to contact my husband. Daddies need encouragement, too.<br />
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<div align="center"></div>Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-52099640461293925832011-03-22T11:11:00.000-05:002011-03-22T11:11:02.802-05:00Anticipation<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMsBRGQGgQw-EA4Wbh3VsenZPq09_0SrM_kKIYzMzES3j9Rt4aDKh2Fmj6of0VY9OVTeN0pt3LVrxwNq4sZw0mBFAkWGXqjobXyj5KOvPbCg5rlJ7Jauw72LWpkBw-PZ9W9xHq_PhvstMu/s1600/boardwalknoocean.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" r6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMsBRGQGgQw-EA4Wbh3VsenZPq09_0SrM_kKIYzMzES3j9Rt4aDKh2Fmj6of0VY9OVTeN0pt3LVrxwNq4sZw0mBFAkWGXqjobXyj5KOvPbCg5rlJ7Jauw72LWpkBw-PZ9W9xHq_PhvstMu/s1600/boardwalknoocean.jpg" /></a></div>As a child growing up in Dallas, one of our yearly family outings was a trip to Six Flags Over Texas. On the night before we traveled to the amusement park, I would lie awake dreaming about the thrill of the whole experience: the rides I would venture to try, the foods I would eat, the fun I would have with my parents and my brother. From our home, the drive took about 45 minutes, but it seemed like 4 hours instead! I still remember what it felt like when we made our final approach toward the park and the roller coasters would come into view from the highway. Zach and I would giggle, point, and shout. It was pure, joyful anticipation.<br />
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There are few things in life that are more delightful than watching my own kids experience that same anticipation. Last week we spent our spring break at the beach in Port Aransas, Texas, with some good friends. Of the five kids we brought along, only our two had ever seen the ocean. But, because Caroline and Mary Claire were just babies on their first trip, this might as well have been their first time. We drove down to the coast on Friday night, and everyone in our van stayed awake well past bedtime and well after dark just hoping to catch a glimpse of the water. When we arrived, our gaggle of sleepy children gleefully helped unload the cars and set up our fabulous beach house for the week. I have never seen such willingness to work hard! At midnight, once the children were finally tucked into their little beds all in a row, Mary Claire remained awake. When I inquired as to why she wasn’t sleeping yet, she replied, “Mommy, can I go see the ocean tonight? Please??” It was so hard to wait!<br />
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You could not have wiped the grin off of their sweet faces the next morning as we prepared to go to the beach. All five children bounced around as we donned swimsuits and hats, pasted bodies with sunscreen, and gathered towels, buckets, and shovels. But, it was their all-out sprint on the boardwalk that got me thinking. <br />
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I stood back, watching the children barreling across that boardwalk, and I wondered: When was the last time I was so excited about something that I literally <em>ran</em> toward it with a big fat smile on my face? This particular boardwalk was a long one with sets of stairs at several places along the way. You could not see the ocean from the starting point. But, that did not stop the children from making a break for it the second their little flip-flops hit the wooden bridge. They knew that the boardwalk meant they were closer than ever to the object of their desire: the smooth sand and the cool water. Even though they had never seen it, they wanted to go. They could hear the waves crashing on the shore, and they knew they were close enough to run.<br />
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In the wake of a season of intense grief in my own life, some days I am not sure that there is anything left for me to run toward. Sometimes I think I am done here with that kind of joy…that there is nothing on earth that could be exciting enough to anticipate with wonder, stay awake dreaming about, and eagerly pursue. I don’t think I am alone. The older we get, it seems that the things we dreamed about may have come and gone. And, some of those dreams didn’t really pay up, if you know what I mean. Maybe we couldn’t sleep on the night before our weddings because we were dreaming of meeting our handsome prince at the end of the aisle and being whisked away to a life of bliss. Now, I’m not picking on marriage. I would choose my husband again and again. But, we all know that’s not what it is really like now, don’t we? It’s deeper and better than that…if you’re willing to work for it. But, it is harder than that, too. So, the school of life teaches us, over time, not to get our hopes up…not to anticipate anything too highly. If we do, we may be disappointed.<br />
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But, something about that mindset just doesn’t jive with my soul! I can’t get my mind off of my children running toward the ocean. Must we give that up? Does growth and maturity really equate with self-protection? My nine-year-old Caroline got stung by a jellyfish while jumping the waves. Up until that painful experience, she probably didn’t even know what a jellyfish was…maybe except for seeing them on SpongeBob cartoons! But, she got up close and personal with one. Ouch! And, I have to tell you, it was a tender job coaxing her back into the water the next day. Who wants to get stung twice? Wisdom says stay out of the ocean, right?<br />
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I don’t think so. <em>Real</em> growth, <em>real</em> maturity teaches us that, yeah, there are jellyfish out there, but if you focus on them, you’ll miss the beauty of the waves, the cool sand on your feet, the castles you can create, and the amazing formations the birds make as they glide over the water. As adults, we justify missing these kinds of things every day because of fear. Stop for a second and ponder it. Getting burned once (or twice) has kept us from going places and trying things that might hold joy, and more importantly for us Christ-followers, <em>kingdom</em> <em>purpose</em>. Even if we don’t avoid something altogether, we protect ourselves by keeping our expectations low so that we won’t be disappointed. We pass our fear and cynicism off as “maturity”! How ridiculous! What a loss!<br />
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I do think there is middle ground between a childlike perspective and a jaded adult world view. We know about jellyfish now. Sand is sticky and gets in your eyes. Life is full of imperfections. There’s no going back. But, we can have a grounded, mature, Biblical world view. And, there is nothing jaded or cynical about it! This perspective says, “Yep. There are jellyfish. But, God is in that ocean! I want to meet Him there! I want to see Him in it! I want to join Him in what He is doing there!” If I saw my world through those kind of eyes, could I begin to <em>anticipate</em> things with joy once again? Could you?<br />
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I am challenged by my children to see the world around me with new eyes, to view the things I think I already know from the perspective of a newcomer. What if I missed something the first time? What if I do not remember it because I was a “baby” the first time I saw it? What if the growth in my heart and soul affords me the chance to perceive things differently now?<br />
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I am challenged by the Holy Spirit to see the world around me with new eyes, too. When I go to spend time with God, do I approach His throne of grace with that kind of abandon? Do I run toward Him in joyful anticipation? Do I expect great things from Him? Even when I cannot physically see the object of my desire, do I see the beginning of the boardwalk, hear the waves crashing in the distance, and, knowing it is the path that leads to joy, break out into a sprint? If not, why not?<br />
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As I close my eyes and envision myself approaching the boardwalk, a prayer is emerging from the depths of my soul: Lord, I want to see your beauty. I want to see You. I want to see You in the people and the world you created. I want to want You. I want to desire You so much that I cannot sleep. I want to desire You so much that I cannot take a leisurely stroll towards the things you have planned for me. Cause me to move toward you in an all-out sprint! Don’t allow me to fool myself into thinking self-protection is maturity. YOU are my protector! Please cleanse me from the fear and cynicism that have built up in my heart because I have been hurt. Help me to trust you more. Give me joyful purpose that is unquenchable. Give me power that moves me toward even the things I cannot see. Cause me to expect great things once again! In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.<br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">“Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Matthew 5:8</div>Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-34892065398329285362011-03-11T10:30:00.000-06:002011-03-11T10:30:53.859-06:00I Gave You My Heart. You Gave Me This Pen.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiG5uW-e5l4omFVWf7V5wQyLqUZH543cQsvJ1ZER1RY90S7kZu0romcW1r5mHxXcr7ETszc17T4Ig9ygCj8Mfrb8jiV-khOLLny0JcgIcpmUDCJ4b3vTm9jzbFbbIJNgDmP2RaO3Yfg9iQR/s1600/tree.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" q6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiG5uW-e5l4omFVWf7V5wQyLqUZH543cQsvJ1ZER1RY90S7kZu0romcW1r5mHxXcr7ETszc17T4Ig9ygCj8Mfrb8jiV-khOLLny0JcgIcpmUDCJ4b3vTm9jzbFbbIJNgDmP2RaO3Yfg9iQR/s1600/tree.jpg" /></a></div><br />
Have you ever received a consolation prize? You know, it’s what you get when you enter a contest but don’t win. (Think about that non-descript participation ribbon you “earned” in elementary school on field day.) The very name of the “consolation” prize is unfortunate. There’s really nothing consoling about it. One definition says that a consolation prize is “generally a parting gift offered to contestants who did not win their competition. The purpose of a consolation prize is to console the contestants who can only watch the winner walk away with the big prize.” In other words, a consolation prize is meant to comfort you, or at least <em>distract</em> <em>you</em> from the truth…which is that you LOST!<br />
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When I was a child, I remember accompanying my parents to a time-share hard-sell. My young, inexperienced parents brought my brother and me along to sit in the waiting room while they endured what seemed like hours of sales pitch, all for the promised award: a boat with motor. The writing on the letter they received in the mail seemed irrefutable. No matter what they decided about the property, it seemed they would undoubtedly win a “boat with motor”. So, they spent a Saturday in this random building while strangers tried to convince them to buy something they knew they could not afford…all the while hoping to get a boat out of the deal. Zach and I were excited. We could just picture our family cruising on the lake. The hope of that boat somehow made the time in the waiting room a little bit more bearable. I will never forget the look on my parents’ faces when they exited that conference room. Out they trod, alongside a handful of other suckers, lugging a box carrying their big prize: an inflatable raft with a battery operated motor! We had been bamboozled! That raft turned out to be a lot of fun in the swimming pool, but it was not exactly what we bargained for! My now very wise parents would probably be embarrassed by my telling you how they fell for this scheme, but it illustrates my point precisely. A consolation prize isn’t really much consolation after all.<br />
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Fast forward to the day my daughter Audrey died. Bryan and I sat in the chaplain’s office, stunned by the news we had received. I was in absolute shock and on the verge of fainting, so the hospital staff brought me a wheelchair. They wheeled me down to the chapel to begin to process our unbelievable reality. I sat in silence, and then I fell to the floor in a puddle of tears. Friends and family began to arrive to wrap their arms around us. I don’t know how long we were there. I remember Bryan leaving the room to talk with the coroner. You know, the stuff of nightmares. I remember coming to the conclusion after a time that we needed to go home. There was nothing left for us at the hospital. <br />
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The staff was professional and accommodating. When we decided to leave, they put me back in the wheelchair and took me to our friend’s car. I remember the surprise on the social worker’s face when I profusely thanked her for helping me and praised her and the chaplain for their efforts toward our family. As they lifted me to standing so I could climb into the car, the chaplain placed an orange box in my hand. It was an easily recognizable box, one from James Avery jewelry. As we traveled home, I remember looking at that box incredulously. I left my <em>child</em> at the hospital, and they gave me a piece of <em>jewelry</em> in exchange? It seemed like a very uneven trade…the worst consolation prize <em>ever</em>. I could not get that line from the movie “Say Anything” out of my head. You might remember it. John Cusack’s character falls in love with a beautiful girl, but he gets burned. When she breaks up with him, she gives him a consolation prize Gen X won’t soon forget: a pen. In disbelief, he tells his friend, “I gave her my heart. And, she gave me this pen.” I wanted to shout out the window of the car that day: “I gave you my heart. And, you gave me this pen!” <br />
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I was conflicted by the hospital’s gift for quite a while. On the one hand, I was appreciative that Dell Children’s Hospital had done everything in their power to communicate their concern for us and show us their sympathy. On the other hand, the tiny orange box made me raging mad. I didn’t want to open it. I didn’t want to know what was inside. How could it possibly make me feel better? It was an insult! Only minutes before it was placed in my hand, I had lost one of the most valuable things I could have ever lost. The Hope Diamond could have been in that box, and I would have tossed it into the ocean if I could have.<br />
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I don’t know if days or weeks passed, but eventually I managed to open that box. Inside, I discovered a silver tree charm. In the center of the tree was a heart-shaped hole. How fitting. A hole. A heart-shaped hole, no less. I immediately began questioning the meaning of the charm. James Avery often assigns meaning to their jewelry, especially their religious items. I had never seen this one before, though. Was it new? I immediately figured that it must be symbolic of our family tree, suddenly missing someone (hence the heart-shaped hole). Yes, a sad, sad family tree. <br />
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I will be honest. I didn’t like it at all. In fact, I hated it. I could not imagine actually wanting to attach it to my charm bracelet, only to be reminded of that horrific day at the hospital. What were they thinking? I felt sorry that the hospital had spent money on that charm. I knew it wasn’t cheap. But, I could not assign any comforting meaning to it. It was, indeed, a consolation prize that offered no consolation. <br />
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Still, I don’t believe in coincidences. I felt deep down that the Lord had a reason for getting this charm into my hands. So, I investigated further. The next time I shopped at James Avery, I inquired about the charm. Did the designer of the jewelry assign it any meaning? I was told that it was commissioned for the hospital specifically, and James Avery could not tell me what it meant. Great, I thought. I now knew that the only people who get one of these things are those who have the unlucky privilege of losing a child. It was like a membership card for a club I didn’t want to join. <br />
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Time went by. I kept that stupid orange box in my closet. Every once and a while, I would catch a glimpse of it out of the corner of my eye, and I would get that sick feeling in my gut. “I hate that thing”, I would think to myself. Nonetheless, I could not bring myself to get rid of it. <br />
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Then, one day I was reading what the Bible has to say about the tree of life. In the middle of the Garden of Eden stood the majestic tree. God gave Adam and Eve access to this tree that was “pleasing in appearance and good for food” (Genesis 2:9). However, after Adam and Eve disobeyed God, they were forbidden from eating the fruit of this tree (Genesis 3:22). No big deal, you may think. But, the fruit of the tree of life sustained life <em>forever</em>. It was the equivalent of a death sentence! God was so serious about this punishment that He placed a cherubim with a “flaming, whirling sword” to guard the way to the tree of life (Genesis 3:24). Quite a predicament for mankind, huh?<br />
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The tree is not mentioned again in Scripture until the last book of the Bible, the book of Revelation. Jesus, speaking through John to the church at Ephesus, says that He will give the “victor” the right to eat from the tree of life (Revelation 2:7). Who is that victor? According to Revelation 22:14, they are those who keep His commandments. The Bible says that those who love God will obey Him. So, the victors are those who love God, believe in Jesus, and keep His commandments. To them will be given the right, once again, to eat of the tree of life. The death sentence will be removed. Eternal life will be granted. And, it will come by eating the fruit of the tree of life. Where will the tree be located? According to Revelation 22:2, it will grow in the center of the city of New Jerusalem on the New Earth (Heaven as it is after Jesus returns). The fruit of the tree will be for “the healing of the nations”. The tree of life is real. We who believe in Jesus will see it one day and also partake of its fruit. But, it is also a symbol of healing and of eternal life. <br />
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Learning this truth was like God turning on the light in the darkness of our traumatic hospital experience. He had, as I had rightly assumed in the beginning, placed that little orange box in my hand for a purpose. He was communicating with me before I was even able to perceive it. He wanted me to know that my heart was not suddenly ripped from my body, though that was the way it felt. Instead, He was helping me to see, perhaps for the first time, that my heart, my real true self, and all of my deepest desires are held safely in the promise of Heaven. In Heaven, there will be healing. And, even in the midst of my pain, the Tree of Life reminds me of God’s provision for me in every moment—from here until eternity. This charm that had plagued me finally communicated HOPE to the depths of my soul. <br />
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Is there some area of your life that has been a big disappointment? Have you experienced some great loss? Are you disillusioned by the difference between the way you thought your life would turn out and the way it actually is? Do you feel like you have received the dreaded “consolation prize”—the one set aside to make the losers feel a little bit better? Then, listen, I have hope for you today! If you will trust in Jesus Christ, you will receive a prize that can never be taken away from you. If you trust Christ, you have treasure stored up for you in Heaven that nothing can destroy. <br />
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3 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4 and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. This inheritance is kept in heaven for you… 1 Peter 1:3-4<br />
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Heaven, friend, is NOT a consolation prize. It is not the trophy of the losers’ bracket! It is not what we get when life has dealt us difficulty and we can “only watch the winner walk away with the big prize”. Heaven IS the big prize! It is so much bigger and more alive than what we have previously imagined. It is so much broader and more enticing and exciting than what we have conceived. It is not merely relief from all of our burdens, it is the fulfillment of all of our grandest desires! <br />
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<em>Believers in Jesus, quit underestimating what awaits you!</em> In so doing, we rob our life of the power and joyful purpose it could have. And, we give non-believers nothing to write home about. Sadly, we misrepresent the faith we claim to believe. We must wrap our mind around the grand prize that we have been given if we want to experience contentment in the midst of disappointment and loss. Moreover, we must joyfully anticipate eternal life if we wish to convince anyone that Jesus is for real—that Christianity is authentic and worth investigating. <br />
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When God broke through my grief and showed me the true meaning of that tree with the heart-shaped hole, I rushed over to James Avery and asked that they attach it to my bracelet. And, I asked that they place it right in the middle where I would always see it. Each time I look at it, I am reminded not of the traumatic aspect of the hospital ER, but instead, of how God reached into my most desperate place and put His sovereignty over it. I am reminded how He made Himself known even in the darkest place and how He asserted His dominion, even over death. Now, when I see my “Tree of Life” charm, I am encouraged to think on Heaven, to remember its reward, and to consider the healing that is promised. Today, I rub my fingers over that heart-shaped hole in the tree, and I anticipate embracing in paradise the one who is still holding part of my heart in her hands.<br />
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Skeptics, consider: Maybe faith isn’t a crutch for the weak and Heaven isn’t a consolation prize for those whose dreams didn’t pan out. Wonder: Could it all be true? <br />
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Believers in Jesus, rejoice! Won’t you quit walking around with your shoulders slumped as if you’ve received the consolation prize?! We are all Grand Prize Winners. It IS all true.Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-90942472946992910062011-03-03T15:56:00.000-06:002011-03-03T15:56:02.926-06:00The 99 and the 1<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMnsJR3HcEClW_Z_GLTe-iDorjg3S7pnzAl16E1rINSWHp39SO9nqOjmyUhwO8qxFScddM-1VR4sfJRpvegcNNInX5YKFo04-KTn02-8Q46X3ZHOGnwIxNCeV8314zvalLMbZI_SdxuBkK/s1600/shepherdcarryingsheep.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" l6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMnsJR3HcEClW_Z_GLTe-iDorjg3S7pnzAl16E1rINSWHp39SO9nqOjmyUhwO8qxFScddM-1VR4sfJRpvegcNNInX5YKFo04-KTn02-8Q46X3ZHOGnwIxNCeV8314zvalLMbZI_SdxuBkK/s320/shepherdcarryingsheep.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
I am embarrassed to admit that I cried when I found out I was pregnant with Mary Claire. I remember sitting on the rocker in my bedroom, and through sobs saying to Bryan, “Caroline hasn’t had enough time to be the only child.” Caroline was just 10 months old when we found out we were expecting again. In some ways I was still trying to play dolls with her. I was in love, and she was enough. I wasn’t mentally prepared for our family to grow. Surprise! Conflicting emotions popped up. What if I could not love another child as much as I loved Caroline? What if she felt ignored or jealous or squeezed by a new baby in the family? <br />
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Many a young parent has had similar feelings. My mother was one of them. When I was born, the “enlightened thinking of the day” suggested that you give your older child a gift from the new baby. This was supposed to help the older child accept the new baby. My grandmother tried to help my mom relax. “Don’t apologize for making Sarah a brother to love,” she said. Still, my parents, trying to be prepared, purchased a purse for me and had it ready upon their homecoming from the hospital. Family lore has it that when my mother tried to offer me the gift, I pushed it aside, pushed her aside, and made my way to my newborn brother. So much for the adult interpretation of three-year-old thought processes… <br />
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Now that I know what I know, I feel silly telling you how I fell into that same trap with my own children. None of my fears materialized. When Mary Claire was born, Caroline was 19 months old. She arrived at the hospital to meet her sister in her navy and white sailor dress, toting her own “baby” in a doll-sized carrier. She crawled up into the bed with me, and smiling all the time, she beheld her little sister. It was love at first sight. My daughter, barely walking herself, cradled her infant sister like a pro. Still the most nurturing child I know, Caroline was made to be a big sis.<br />
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When we discovered Audrey’s surprise conception, we were not gripped at all by the fear that she would rob our other two of their time in the spotlight. We knew they would love each other deeply and become best buddies. When Audrey was born, Caroline and Mary Claire were still so small (3 and 1 ½), but they were in awe of our amazing gift. As they sat in the hospital room and inspected our newest family member (umbilical cord stump, tiny feet and all), I knew in my heart that our love had been multiplied, not divided. Sure, our time and money would be divided once more, but not our love.<br />
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Having all three of them was like Heaven. Seriously. I’d like to share some pictures of my “best day ever” with you (that’s a shout-out to you, Mary Claire…Little Miss “This-is-the-BEST-DAY-EVER!”). I know there are more good days to come. But, the day we took Audrey home from the hospital will always be one of my fondest memories. It was a gorgeous spring day, not unlike today…sunny, breezy, and mild. All was right with my world. The peace and joy I felt were indescribable…a foretaste of Heaven. Caroline and Mary Claire came dressed in their “big sister” t-shirts to escort us home. We went out to lunch, and then we went to play at the park. As my mom and I sat on the park bench admiring Audrey in the afternoon sunlight filtered through the shade of giant oaks, Bryan and the girls chased each other through tunnels and sifted gravel with their hands. Why, in my rocking chair, in the privacy of my bedroom, had I ever wondered if I could love another child? My cup ran over. I had all my little chicks gathered in my arms.<br />
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In the few years that followed that moment in time (maybe in the hours that followed), I discovered that meeting the needs of three children that small was demanding. My hands were indeed full! But, my heart had plenty of room. My girls learned from the beginning to share and take turns. If I was busy, they had each other. If one cried, I comforted. If one was hungry, I fed her. If one needed a snuggle, I offered a lap. If one had a question, I answered. It was never even, but no one seemed slighted. It was challenging work, but I treasured each one of my children.<br />
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I had no reason to think that my “rocking chair question” would ever resurface. But, when I faced Audrey’s sudden death, I began to question again, “Do I have enough love to go around?” My grief required so much of me that I was afraid I would unwittingly harm Caroline and Mary Claire…somehow not give them enough of me.<br />
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Like the voices of the baby advice books rang in my mother’s ears, the voice of well-meaning neighbors and friends echoed in my ears for a long time after Audrey’s death. People, jaded by their own experiences or those they had “heard of”, advised me to “go on” for my living children. No less than four days after Audrey’s death, I remember wailing in grief, “She was just so perfect. She was beautiful and healthy and perfect.” This comment came out of my very gut. It was an expression of my confusion at the sudden death. How could my adorable little girl have been so alive one moment and gone the next? Instead of hearing my heart and offering me comfort, one loving family member, wanting to be helpful, warned me that calling Audrey “perfect” might make Caroline and Mary Claire think that they are somehow less than perfect. If I recall the situation correctly, there was a story behind the admonition. An adult friend she knew still had issues with feeling unloved because of her mother’s grief over the death of a sibling. It was heartbreaking for me to hear this story. I didn’t love Caroline and Mary Claire less because I wanted Audrey back! I didn’t think I needed to worry whether they would be harmed by my grief. Did I need to be? Was I going to miss something important? Would I be able to meet their needs and also meet my own? There was enough emotional space in our family for three children a few days ago. Wasn’t there still enough space for three now?<br />
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As the weeks and months rolled on, these questions nagged at me in the quiet moments. I could not seem to reconcile the need to continue loving Audrey with the fact that I had no tangible way to do it. I could no longer brush her hair or rock her to sleep. I could not make her a plate at the dinner table or read her a book. Though I appeared to have only two children to care for, in my heart, I still had three. How could I show my love for Audrey? And, would doing that make my other children feel less important?<br />
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Here is my journal entry from February 28, 2008, only three short months after Audrey died:<br />
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“I’ve thought of this before, but I’m not sure I wrote it down yet…So many days I find myself just checking out…longing for Audrey. Sometimes I think I’d do anything—anything—to go to her. I often feel guilty about this. After all, I do have a lot here to be grateful for…people and things I am responsible for and love. But, there is this overwhelming need to take care of the one I can’t get to. I can’t even count the number of well-meaning folks who’ve told me I’ve got to “go on” for my husband and kids. Not necessarily in so many words, but that’s the gist. And, still, I’m longing for the one who’s missing.”<br />
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In that same entry, I mentioned a Bible story that brought me great comfort. Today, three years later, it still makes my heart skip a beat. It is a story you probably know…one that, to me, reflects the essence of the Father’s heart for each of us, His immeasurable love for us. It is the parable of the lost sheep (Matthew 18:12-14). <br />
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“What do you think? If a man owns a hundred sheep, and one of them wanders away, will he not leave the ninety-nine on the hills and go to look for the one that wandered off? 13 And if he finds it, truly I tell you, he is happier about that one sheep than about the ninety-nine that did not wander off. 14 In the same way your Father in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should perish.”<br />
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Let me set up the scene for you. Before Jesus tells the parable, His disciples have just asked him, “Who is the greatest in the kingdom of Heaven?” (Matthew 18:1). Can you imagine what Jesus was thinking? (Oh, for goodness’ sake! When are these people going to get who I am? When are they going to get what I came to do?) <br />
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Jesus knew He was going to need a visual aid to get through to His disciples as He answered them, so He called over a child. I can just imagine Jesus, standing amongst the men, extending His arm out to that child and drawing her close. I can see Him putting His hands on her shoulders, pointing to her, and stating emphatically, “If you don’t become like this little child right here, you will not even enter the kingdom of Heaven!” (v. 3). Bet that’s not what the disciples expected to hear!<br />
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Jesus always taught in allegory. And, what He said almost invariably meant more than one thing at once. That was one of the reasons His followers’ heads were always spinning. In this case, Jesus wanted the disciples to see how important children are to Him, but more than that, He wanted them to see themselves as little children. Jesus wanted the disciples to see themselves in relationship to Him. He spoke as a loving father to His children. <br />
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As I read the parable of the lost sheep in my grief, I absorbed it on two levels. I identified with both the parent role and the child role in the story…both the role of the protector and the one who needed protecting. Perhaps you can, too. Notice that this man owns a hundred sheep. Only one of them has wandered away. Ninety-nine of his sheep are near, accounted for, and under his watch care. What is one little sheep? Apparently, that one little sheep is irreplaceable. For, the man leaves the 99 and goes out on the hill looking for the one that is lost. Think about it. Might that involve some risk to the 99 on the hill? Was there anyone there to watch over them while he left? I don’t know. But, I love what this desperate action communicates. It says that this shepherd did not just feel sad about the missing sheep. He didn’t just say, “Oh, well. That really stinks. I hope he is o.k. I sure hope he comes back safely.” No! On the contrary, that shepherd dropped everything to go out and look for the sheep! The shepherd’s response involved not just feelings, but action. He went in pursuit of the one that was lost.<br />
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I know sheep aren’t people, but if they could think and interact like we do, what do you suppose the 99 were thinking while the shepherd was out looking for the lost sheep? Let’s just assume this lost sheep was a brother of theirs. Do you think they were all grumbling? “Seriously? There he goes again chasing after our brother when he could be spending time with us!” Or, do you think they were expressing loving concern? “I sure hope the shepherd finds our brother. I am scared for him and don’t want him to be lost!” What do you think the shepherd’s actions toward the 1 communicate to the 99 about his love for each of them? Maybe they realize if any one of them was lost, he would look for them, too. Maybe they don’t feel jealous. Maybe, instead, they feel deeply loved.<br />
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This parable speaks volumes into my grief. I am reassured that within the bounds of a healthy, attentive relationship with Caroline and Mary Claire, no amount of time given to Audrey (even in her absence) is going to make them feel unloved. In fact, I cannot think of a better way to communicate my love for them than to authentically show them how I would feel, think, and act if they were taken away from me. Over time, my behavior will teach them how very important they are. Sharing time with Audrey was and is normal for them. Sharing me with Audrey was and is normal for them. Their place in the family is secure. And, her place in the family is secure, too. She still requires our time and energy. How, you may ask? We talk about her. We talk about where she is, what life would be like if she were here. We celebrate her birthday. We talk to her, pray for her, talk to God on her behalf. “Send things to her” by balloon. Bryan and I speak to anyone who will listen about Heaven and eternal perspective. We cry. I write. We take family pictures and try to put something in them to represent her. We hang her stocking at Christmas. And, we are just getting started. We will always include her in our life, and that will enhance, not diminish the life Caroline and Mary Claire have left to live. I am as confident of the goodness of this as I am about the goodness of bringing her home to my family in the first place.<br />
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Best of all, letting my little girls see the deep pain I have over the loss of our Audrey will eventually convince their hearts of God’s relentless pursuit of them. He will NEVER quit coming after them. As a loving father, He wants them near, accounted for, and under His watch care. Even if there are 99 others safe in His arms, God will risk everything to rescue them.<br />
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Jesus is the kind of God who embraced a little child and said, “This is what I’m talking about.” Do you know that Jesus? Unless we turn to Him like little children to a loving father, we will not see the kingdom of Heaven. Won’t you turn around and start running toward Him? Jesus said, “Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you were not willing.” (Matthew 23:37, Luke13:34) It broke Jesus’ heart that people did not run to Him. Still does. He has a longing to gather his children together, just as I did on the day I brought Audrey home from the hospital. He wants us all in His arms. But, some of us are still not willing. And, He lets us make the choice. The love I feel for each of my children is so intense. I cannot imagine how an all-powerful, all-knowing, all-loving creator God must feel about me…and about you. I can’t imagine what pain it causes Him for us to be far away from Him. Won’t you accept His love for you today? <br />
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Some of you who are reading have still not chosen to see yourselves as little children in need of rescue. You do not acknowledge Jesus as Lord of your life. Still, He is your Father. And, He will never stop pursuing you. He may have many of us already under the umbrella of His care, but His love for each He has created is so strong, it is as if no one else ever existed but YOU. He will leave the 99 and come looking for you…not just if you get lost…but, even if you are running away from Him. And, He will be happier when He finds you than He is about the 99 who did not wander off (v. 13). This doesn’t diminish the love He has for those who already acknowledge Him! Instead, it reveals His love for redemption! And, when I finally see Audrey in Heaven, my mother’s heart will likewise rejoice. It is all redeemed! <br />
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I admit I stole the idea for the picture above from Angie Smith (author of the blog "Bring the Rain" and of the book "I Will Carry You"). But, I could not resist it. Doesn't a picture speak what a heart cannot? Doesn't this picture communicate what my mouth will never be able to utter? Dearly loved child of God, there is a place reserved for you that no one else can fill. Won’t you wake up to God’s relentless pursuit of you? Won’t you let that encourage your soul today? There may be 99 on a hill, but to God, YOU are the 1.<br />
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<div style="text-align: left;"></div>Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-53576460771072753042011-02-23T14:02:00.000-06:002011-02-23T14:02:27.440-06:00Dem Bones (The Finale): Getting Back on Track<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxKjKicl-ULhaCL_mjjDExbvfiKg2Hyyr70FEEuuaNdMdh006R_eQ5Irwwq1UFcyA8mdIVWCQy0ozwYeE_Ige48wX0-a73SFtCDjirhzFM3ACgznKSaNL7jTme-NgRBzZx5altrWDHE6eb/s1600/easybutton.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" j6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxKjKicl-ULhaCL_mjjDExbvfiKg2Hyyr70FEEuuaNdMdh006R_eQ5Irwwq1UFcyA8mdIVWCQy0ozwYeE_Ige48wX0-a73SFtCDjirhzFM3ACgznKSaNL7jTme-NgRBzZx5altrWDHE6eb/s1600/easybutton.jpg" /></a></div><div align="center"></div><br />
I am coining a new term: “Sarah’s Law”. While Murphy’s Law says “anything that can go wrong will”, Sarah’s Law says, “If you try to give other people advice about something, you will struggle with that same thing next week!” It is God’s way of keeping me very, very humble. Case in point: As soon as I started writing my “Dem Bones” series, my whole family got the flu. One by one, we all succumbed to the illness. This was not a bug we could “push through”. It landed us on the couch…for three weeks. What happened to the gym? Skipped it. What happened to eating healthy? Forget about it. If it sounded good, I ate it. It’s no big deal to take a break from life for a while, but, for me, getting out of my routine sends me down a slippery slope. Even though I am no longer sick with the flu, the beginning of this week has been rough. My body is tired and weak. I want to bake a lot of brownies…which only make me feel weaker. And, I have been praying myself out of bed in the morning…again.<br />
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So, today I trudged into the OB/GYN’s office for my annual exam and announced, “I want to feel strong and healthy! Some things with my metabolism are still off. When I get sick, it knocks me down more than it should. I have to eat perfectly in order to feel good. I had a cup of coffee yesterday and my left hand shook violently until 3 p.m. Let’s explore my hormones to see if things are just right.” I’ll be honest. I really don’t want to see a bunch of doctors again. I don’t want to take medicine. But, I want to do what God is calling me to do. I want to be good at my life. I want to enjoy it. And, it is still really hard for me to feel healthy. Perhaps I will discover that one of my hormone or vitamin levels is off a bit. If not, then I will decide it is my lot to avoid certain foods permanently and exercise religiously. I can accept that. But, there is one thing I will not do ever again: give up the fight!<br />
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I have determined through all of my various stresses and losses that maintaining a healthy physical body is like pushing the “easy button”. You’ve seen the advertisements for Staples office supplies, right? Their tag line is “Staples. That was easy.” Their “easy button” ad campaign features situations when it would really rock if you could just push a button to make things simpler. Isn’t life like that? In the last 10 years I have often wished that I could push the easy button. Sometimes things can be so complicated. In my temporal life on this earth, the closest thing I have found to the easy button is prioritizing my physical health. When I am healthy, it seems I have just pushed the easy button. I have more energy, I have more motivation, I am more easily inspired, I have more patience, I have more mental clarity, I can make better decisions, I am less apt to become irritable, I feel more hopeful, I can forgive more, I can love more, I can sacrifice more, I can more easily act on my faith, and I have more of a desire to live the victorious, adventurous, joyful Christian life I was MEANT TO LIVE!<br />
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Don’t you want those things, too? As Christians, don’t we want a way to make doing what God is calling us to do a little bit more effortless? Then, take care of your body! Listen, I know we are not 100% in charge of our health. My mother-in-law died of brain cancer, and she lived a physically healthy and spirit-filled life. We don’t know why she got cancer. She couldn’t have done anything to prevent it. And, she couldn’t have done anything more to fight it. She had three brain surgeries and endured rounds of chemotherapy. She prayed and truly believed God would heal her. And, she died. I am not under the illusion that if we just do things right and try a little harder then we will be unscathed. My point is that many of us are making choices on a daily basis that hurt our physical health. I am concentrating here on what we DO have some influence over. Maybe not control, per se, but <em>influence</em>. If you could influence your health for the better and could essentially push the easy button on your life, wouldn’t you want to do that? You may have to make some sacrifices. But, I challenge you to think about what you have to gain. What would your spouse have to gain? How about your children? Even more importantly, I challenge you, Christian brothers and sisters, to think about what the <em>kingdom</em> <em>of</em> <em>God</em> has to gain.<br />
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Consider the apostle Paul’s words:<br />
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“Though I am free and belong to no one, I have made myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible…Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.” 1 Corinthians 9:19, 24-27<br />
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Why, then, do we discipline our bodies and care for them? Of course, to honor God’s Holy Spirit who lives in us, but, also to bring our own spirits into a place where we can be better used of God. When we take care of our bodies, our blinders are removed and we can see more clearly what God’s will is for our lives. We are also better equipped to win others to Christ and to “get a crown that will last forever”.<br />
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I know God wants me to be in tune with Him. He wants me to start seeing the world from His eyes. He wants me to use the gifts He gave me to show others who He is. And, He has given me lots of day to day responsibilities—not to mention lots of junk to heal and recover from! He knows I need to be healthy (body and spirit) to do this well. Again, not just to survive it all, but to be victorious. <br />
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In the past, my physical health was the one area of my life I would let slide when I got stressed out or busy. This is still my default mode of operation if I am not vigilant. I used to think that eating unhealthy foods or leaving exercise off of my to-do list was “cutting myself some slack”, when, in actuality, it was abusing my body. Now, when I need to cut myself some slack, I try to leave laundry unfolded (or unwashed!), to cook scrambled eggs for dinner instead of a gourmet meal, to send a birthday present a week late, to opt out of a planned social engagement, or to (horrors!) skip the kids’ homework until we all feel like we can accomplish it with a good attitude. Not much really has to be done in a given day. We are tempted to live under the tyranny of the urgent. But, that is a choice. And, to the best of my ability, I choose to do whatever it takes to cut other things out so that I can care for my body and the bodies of those I love. By the time I have attended to that and to the spiritual well-being of my household, there is little time left over. I have to be choosy these days. So do you. <br />
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I have by no means got this all figured out. For me, it’s about not falling off the truck permanently. When I lose my way, I find it again. This time, I don’t have a goal except to keep going. God knows there are a lot of things we cannot influence, like genetics and certain kinds of disease. But, with God’s help, we <em>can</em> quit putting apple juice in our gas tank. We <em>can</em> do the regular maintenance that makes it more likely our engine will keep running throughout the fullness of God’s plan for us—all the days he planned for us before any of them yet existed (Psalm 139:16). <br />
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Do you need to make a change to get back on track? If you have fallen off the truck, don’t give up! With God’s help, you can prioritize your body again.<br />
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I pray God will give YOU all you need to take care of dem bones and live victoriously today!<br />
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Lord, please help us to honor you with our bodies. Help us to see them as important to you. We admit we are helpless to change ourselves. We need you to order our steps. Take each part of us into your perfect will so that we may please you and also enjoy the adventurous, exciting, purposeful life you have planned for us to live. In Jesus’ name, Amen.Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-72771827396828754262011-02-17T10:59:00.000-06:002011-02-17T10:59:37.601-06:00Dem Bones (Part 4): Plato, Pop Culture, and You<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYzkQMxDGAGV8aK6IsvcDfmTeSEq8hwd8bR-PAwlynf-BgwIN7i8-FwqQlIjaEa4tPTS6Ralk0sUNJJWyqrb7ZDv8n4WPCcYAW5aQ1k68p-jM79Yx-A_9sjPgRKVbHYpxsERcAMcPxaN78/s1600/plato.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" j6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYzkQMxDGAGV8aK6IsvcDfmTeSEq8hwd8bR-PAwlynf-BgwIN7i8-FwqQlIjaEa4tPTS6Ralk0sUNJJWyqrb7ZDv8n4WPCcYAW5aQ1k68p-jM79Yx-A_9sjPgRKVbHYpxsERcAMcPxaN78/s1600/plato.jpg" /></a></div><br />
Does it bother anyone else that Victoria’s Secret parades half-naked girls with angel wings down a runway on primetime television? There’s nothing wrong with lingerie, but these ads sell more than pretty things to wear in private. And, can’t we be our own models in the bedroom? Why do we need to see it on a 20-year-old waif first? Rephrase: Why does my husband need to see it on a 20-year-old waif first? And, don’t get me started about the angel thing. Angels are real, but I bet they don’t wear push-up bras. Say I’m overreacting, but I am finally using my head to think about things like this instead of just accepting everything that comes shooting out of my television screen. Hooray for Victoria’s Secret for blurring the lines between mainstream values, Christianity, and soft pornography. <br />
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How about the new commercial for theladders.com? It pokes fun at $100,000 wage-earners in an ad where nerdy execs pose in “provocative” positions. I use that term lightly. There is intentionally nothing really provocative about these folks. In the ad, theladders.com promises to make job-seekers “more attractive” to companies. I will give it to them: it IS pretty funny. My first reaction was a giggle. But, then I felt kind of icky inside. It took me a while to sort out why it rubs me the wrong way. I have a sense of humor, and I really appreciate creativity. This ad inspires both, but it still bugs me. Maybe it is because a company that says it exists to help professionals attain high-paying jobs has stooped to the same low-brow tactics as everyone else in America. This isn’t a moral judgment, but it <em>is</em> social commentary. As they say, sex sells. If marketers aren’t using sex to get your attention, then they are appealing to your desire for beauty, strength, and health. Everything today is guaranteed to satisfy your cravings, make you look younger, and help you live longer. Look around you. What is for sale now that doesn’t have anything to do with your physical body in some way? You won’t find much. There is no doubt about the message of the world: your body matters. <br />
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It is striking to me that the message of the world is also the message of the Bible…but with a twist. Make no mistake, your body matters to God, too. Remember? You are <em>nephesh</em>—spirit joined with body. God made you in His image and even chooses for His Holy Spirit to dwell within the bodies of those who believe in Jesus. But, all you have to do is open a magazine or turn on the TV to see that Satan has taken something God made and called “good” and perverted it. <br />
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The world says that your <em>value</em> lies primarily in the physical. Whether we are willing to admit it or not, we are often seduced by this message. We feel the pull to be prettier, sexier, younger looking. But deep down, as Christians, I think we know that the emphasis on the physical in our culture is unbalanced. And, as we should, we want to counter that emphasis. We often do that by championing the “spiritual”. After all, it is the <em>inside</em> that counts, right? Truth, indeed…but not the <em>whole</em> truth. I think our disdain for the all-out worship of things like beauty, health, and sex in our culture can cause us as Christians to proverbially “throw the baby out with the bathwater”. We figure we need to show the world that we operate on a “higher” plane. So, we go out of our way to prove that physical things are beneath us and are unimportant. But, are we really presented with such a black and white choice? Do we really have to choose between worship of the physical and the renunciation of it? I don’t think so. There is a healthy, biblical middle ground. But, we have trouble seeing it because of a Greek guy named Plato. <br />
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Over time, theological doctrine has been influenced by culture. We would do well to be on our guard and be aware of the ways in which our culture subtly and not-so-subtly shapes our understanding of Scripture. While the Bible and its truth are unchanging, the interpretation of them is not. The influence of the green movement on current-day theological thought proves my point. While stewardship of the earth is a biblical value, the secular green movement has begun to target churches in propagandizing its message. And, some of that message is decidedly unbiblical. The same thing is taking place with the concept of social justice and with the issue of abortion. Legitimate Christian denominations are currently divided over these topics. If we are not careful, we can twist biblical truth just a little bit in order to make it fit into the popular thinking of the day, and this can have a profound impact on generations that follow… <br />
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…Such is the case with the concept that the physical realm is inherently evil and the spiritual realm is inherently good. It is an old idea with insidious and long-standing influence in the church, even today. Consider these excerpts from Randy Alcorn’s <u>Heaven</u>:<br />
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“In Plato’s statement, ‘Soma sema’ (‘a body, a tomb’), he asserts that the spirit’s highest destiny is to be forever free from the body.” (p.476) <br />
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“Plato, the Greek philosopher, believed that material things, including the human body and the earth, are evil, while immaterial things such as the soul and Heaven are good. This view is called Platonism. The Christian church, highly influenced by Platonism through the teachings of Philo (ca. 20 BC-AD 50) and Origen (AD 185-254), among others, came to embrace the “spiritual” view that human spirits are better off without bodies…” (p. 52)<br />
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Mr. Alcorn uses this information to explain why we have devised the unbiblical notion that Heaven is a non-physical place where we float around in a disembodied state and hop from cloud to cloud (you know, playing the harp and having one endless church service!). Whoever wants to go there, raise your hand… What?! No takers?! Can you believe that <em>Plato</em> is the one that inspired such nonsense? You may be thinking, “Come on! I know that isn’t how Heaven is!” But, do you have another notion of Heaven that is well-developed? You may not believe you will be hopping from cloud to cloud, but you may not be able to imagine what else it could be like either. We don’t know what to attribute it to, but for some reason we haven’t really been taught to think of Heaven as a physical place, much less an earthly one. But, that is exactly the way the Bible describes Heaven as it will be after Jesus comes back (on the New Earth). Mr. Alcorn would suggest that our inability to ascribe physical characteristics to Heaven and to our eternal bodies is because of the subconscious influence of Platonism. <br />
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When I first read about this, I was floored. It may not mean a hill of beans to you, but I was shocked that the church had been and continues to be so profoundly influenced by the secular teachings of a Greek philosopher. (Makes me wonder what else I am being duped about…) When I learned about Platonism, I immediately felt free to dump all of my old notions about eternal things in favor of a more accurate biblical viewpoint. And, let me tell you, the truth makes Heaven a LOT more appealing. No wonder we are all so unexcited about it!<br />
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Like last week, you may be wondering, “What does this have to do with taking care of my body?” Again, I assert: Everything! I think that the same philosophy that robs us of our joy of Heaven steals our ability to properly view our physical bodies as important in life on earth now. The idea that material things (including our bodies) are evil and that spiritual things are good makes us feel like we have to choose between two undesirable options: joining the world in the worship of the physical or renouncing the physical as inconsequential. Neither of these options reveals God’s heart toward his human creation. <br />
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Here is the bottom line: We don’t have to choose between Plato and pop culture. I choose door #3! My body matters to God. My <em>value</em> is not wrapped up in whether or not I am the most beautiful, sexiest, or youngest looking person alive. Beauty and sex are not inherently bad things. God made them! In their rightful place, they are (as God said) “good”. But, they are not to be the <em>pursuit</em> of my life. Above all else, I need to pursue Christ. And, in so doing, I will learn the <em>discipline</em> of being a good steward of my body. My body is inextricably tied to my spirit. And, the Bible encourages me to use it well as I engage in my life’s mission. Let’s look at <em>how</em> we do that next week.Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-43971325469791597592011-02-09T10:13:00.000-06:002011-02-09T10:13:01.694-06:00Dem Bones (Part 3): The Dust of the Ground and the Breath of Life<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgx8a8CkrrplFkqRoBq3jBozmiyh4YUA8zV1VA_25nDXh7aAnPkn34bXVkzIPmNfHkDK2xaZsfkmIJelNagh6tI6GvKTPRNQkhqJcIHZxy6Ic0mlQU_e9aEcaFZkZ6QQfse88rGksZ2N_3/s1600/praise2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" h5="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgx8a8CkrrplFkqRoBq3jBozmiyh4YUA8zV1VA_25nDXh7aAnPkn34bXVkzIPmNfHkDK2xaZsfkmIJelNagh6tI6GvKTPRNQkhqJcIHZxy6Ic0mlQU_e9aEcaFZkZ6QQfse88rGksZ2N_3/s1600/praise2.jpg" /></a></div>The first funeral I ever attended was that of my paternal grandmother. I was nine years old. I can remember walking into the visitation at the funeral home like it was yesterday. It was so disturbing to me. Organ music, dim lighting, and the sickly sweet smell of lilies. As I stood over the casket and hesitantly peeked in, I remember my parents comforting me with these words: “Grandma is not in there, honey. It is just her shell.” I suppose, for children, this suffices as one of the most concrete ways to explain death. The spirit leaves the body, and all that is left is a shell. (Think hermit crabs and other sea creatures.) <br />
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Have you noticed that our childhood experiences have an uncanny way of silently creeping into our grown-up perceptions of things? How many of us, if we are honest, still perceive death as we did when we were 9? Don’t many of us still get that queasy feeling when we hear organ music or take a whiff of lilies? And, when we stand over a casket, isn’t there something inside of us that is still unsatisfied with the “shell” explanation? Don’t we want <em>more</em> now that we are adults? Yet, many of us still don’t know what that “more” is. And, so when we meet with that fateful day when we take our own children along for their first funeral, we tell them, “Don’t worry, honey. It is just a shell.” We don’t know what else to say. <br />
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I had to know what God said about the physical body once and for all when I was forced to bury my two-year-old. Nothing is more counter-intuitive than putting the growing, soft, sweet body of your little girl in the hard, cold ground. This is especially true when you are the one whose very own body housed that other little body as it formed from two single cells into a living, breathing human being with thoughts and feelings and a God-given purpose to fulfill. In that case, the physical body seems pretty important. It is the part that nurses at your breast and snuggles in your lap as you sing lullabies. It is the part that gives sloppy kisses and forms the “hook ‘em horns” sign with chubby fingers. It wears the dress-up clothes and produces the adorable grin and cute voice that belts the word ‘FAB-U-LOOOUUUS!’ from the soundtrack of High School Musical. In short, the physical body is a big part of the way we know someone—and care for someone. Ask your mother. It is why she still wants you to eat good food. It is why she still wants to comfort you when you are sick. And, it is why she still winces at the idea of you getting a tattoo. <br />
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On the surface, the “shell” metaphor seems to work. But, in actuality, it falls far short of the truth, and it can lead to some false beliefs about the relationship between the physical and the spiritual in God’s human creation. Bodies and spirits were never meant to be separated. Death is not, like we have been told, “a natural part of life.” It is a perversion of God’s perfect design, a result of the fall. A day is coming when all bodies will be reunited with their spirits. Jesus says that one day all who have died will rise from their graves (believers and non) to face judgment (John 5:28-29). Bodies are not just shells that can be discarded when the spirit finds a better (or another…) home. <br />
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By now you may be wondering, “What in the world does this have to do with the topic of physical health?” I contend that it has a LOT to do with it. It is my opinion that the way we view the body in <em>death</em> speaks volumes about our view of the body in <em>life</em>. I would argue that if we still think that it is natural and normal for the spirit to leave the body in death that we are probably not placing the proper import on the physical body while we still breathe! Are our bodies really just shells for our spirits after all? Or, are they <em>more</em>? <br />
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Want the truth? Your body matters in this world…and in the next. Good thing the Bible reassures us that it is so much more than a shell.<br />
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Read this excerpt from Randy Alcorn’s book Heaven:<br />
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“Genesis 2:7 says, ‘The Lord God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.’ The Hebrew word for ‘living being’ is <em>nephesh</em>, often translated ‘soul’. The point at which Adam became <em>nephesh</em> is when God joined his body (dust) and spirit (breath) together. Adam was not a living human being until he had both material (physical) and immaterial (spiritual) components. Thus, the essence of humanity is not just spirit, but <em>spirit joined with body</em>. Your body does not merely house the real you—it is as much a part of who you are as your spirit is.”(p.112)<br />
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Did you catch that? “Your body does not merely house the real you—it is as much a part of who you are as your spirit is.” Doesn’t that change the way you view your body? It profoundly changes the way I view mine. You see, we have been trained as Christians to nurture our <em>spirits</em>. But, we can’t start to do a better job of taking care of our <em>bodies</em> until we recognize that they actually count. And, we can see from Genesis 2:7 that the essence of who we are is <em>spirit joined with body</em>. No other part of creation has this distinction. Neither the earth, the sea, the sky, the stars, nor even the animals are spirit joined with body. For humans--and humans alone--body and spirit are inextricably linked. We are the pinnacle of God’s creation. And, this link between our bodies and spirits is what makes us unique.<br />
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Let’s look at some Scriptures that show the effect your spirit has on your body (SPIRIT→BODY). I have written before about the way our bodies respond to emotional stress in my blog post “The Physical Toll of Grief” (February, 2010). Grief, I rationalized, can certainly affect your physical body. The Bible says so. Take these verses as examples:<br />
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Be merciful to me, LORD, for I am in distress; <br />
my eyes grow weak with sorrow, <br />
my soul and body with grief. <br />
My life is consumed by anguish <br />
and my years by groaning; <br />
my strength fails because of my affliction,<br />
and my bones grow weak. Psalm 31:9-10<br />
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My heart is blighted and withered like grass; <br />
I forget to eat my food. <br />
In my distress I groan aloud <br />
and am reduced to skin and bones. Psalm 102:4-5<br />
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We know from these verses that negative influences on our spirit affect our bodies negatively. But, Scripture teaches us that there is a positive correlation between spirit and body, too. It says that when good things happen in our spirits, our bodies benefit. Look at these examples:<br />
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Do not be wise in your own eyes; <br />
fear the LORD and shun evil. <br />
This will bring health to your body <br />
and nourishment to your bones. Proverbs 3:7-8<br />
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Whoever is patient has great understanding, <br />
but one who is quick-tempered displays folly.<br />
A heart at peace gives life to the body… Proverbs 14:29-30a<br />
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What about looking at the connection from the other direction? In other words, what does the Bible say about how the body affects the spirit? (BODY→SPIRIT) Let’s look at the example in Proverbs 6:32. Solomon has gone on and on warning his son not to get involved with the adulteress. In a nutshell, he is telling his son that if you get your body involved in sin, it will devastate your spirit. “The one who commits adultery lacks sense; whoever does so <em>destroys himself</em>.” Mistreating the body leads to the destruction of the whole self—which includes the spirit.<br />
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Yes, Scripture is clear. In so many places, it reinforces that undeniable <em>relationship</em> between body and spirit and, in the process, the undeniable <em>import</em> of both. To me, the Bible screams, “Respect both! Honor both! Nurture both! Please God with both!”<br />
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No, my body is not just a shell that houses the “real” me. It is a vital part of the humanity God created to worship Him and have fellowship with Him. I must not ignore it! It might take 5 in the grave for a while, but it will eventually be restored and last forever. <br />
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If you have heard all of what I have said so far and are still tempted to think your body doesn’t really matter, consider this Scripture (the most significant reason for giving your body some attention): <br />
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“Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.” (1 Corinthians 6:19-20) <br />
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Wow. My body is God’s house? We can see here that what we choose to do with our bodies affects not just our <em>own</em> spirits, but <em>God’s Holy</em> Spirit. Ups the ante, doesn’t it? (YOUR BODY→GOD’S HOLY SPIRIT)<br />
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You see, when I realize that my body is God’s dwelling place, my motivation to care for it increases. As I begin to accept God’s call to follow Him more closely, the care of my body goes way beyond avoiding that which is expressly forbidden in Scripture and moves toward lovingly submitting my whole self to God, doesn’t it? I am constantly challenged by what this means in my life. But, I am excited about what following God around that corner promises! I am slowly, but surely, moving away from merely selfish reasons for being physically healthy (like looking good or even feeling good) and moving toward a longer-lasting, Christ-centered motivation. <br />
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Let me ask you this: What is holding you back? How much more impact could you have on the kingdom of God if you recognized that you are not just a spirit inhabiting a shell for a time? Do you not know that you are dust of the earth (body) and breath of life (spirit) joined together? You are unlike any other of God’s creations. You are special. Everything that makes you YOU is important to God. He cares about you—inside and out! Yes, dear one, you are <em>nephesh</em>—a living being (a soul) whose purpose is to glorify God with ALL that you are. Don’t you forget it!<br />
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(Join me next week as we look at some interesting history that may shed some light on why we in the church have elevated the spiritual realm above the physical realm. Part of the process of shifting our paradigm is discovering where our thinking originates and bringing it back to the truth of Scripture. I hope you will be intrigued by what I have discovered and challenged to bring all of your beliefs in line with God’s Word. For me, this study has been a big part of finally properly prioritizing my health.)Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-2959847519871037682011-02-03T16:37:00.000-06:002011-02-03T16:37:38.394-06:00Dem Bones (Part 2): Falling Off the Truck<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMjnEvbi7re3VSB1S0bM8yVpl1f7Ozzc0sCQ829wuh0G7HaD6kYlz7FjEBQBBHeAbAJYrtdoyEcV_KHqSlVH2oeiM6W08WyNKX9r5uBTiri2RXkgHSWbhgMPXeuWlFqYWmZgpH9B9-f8W1/s1600/logtruck.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" s5="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMjnEvbi7re3VSB1S0bM8yVpl1f7Ozzc0sCQ829wuh0G7HaD6kYlz7FjEBQBBHeAbAJYrtdoyEcV_KHqSlVH2oeiM6W08WyNKX9r5uBTiri2RXkgHSWbhgMPXeuWlFqYWmZgpH9B9-f8W1/s1600/logtruck.jpg" /></a></div><br />
The bench in the parking lot of Chili’s became a familiar meeting spot for my friend Viki and me—a beacon of comfort and commiseration during a challenging season of life. It was there, in the fall of 2006, that we would meet weekly and chat for hours. We were trying to convince each other that we would feel better someday. The truth, though, was that both of us feared that our children may soon be visiting us in a nursing home wiping drool off of our chins. I’m not exaggerating. We were both physically sick, seeking a solution to our health woes. We were like sleuths putting together a 1500-piece puzzle and trying to solve the mystery. What had happened to us? We were scared. We were both barely 30, and we felt 80. It was a season that today we affectionately call, “falling off the truck”. It was as if some unknown force just dumped us off of a moving vehicle. The fall was a hard one.<br />
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Maybe as you are reading this today, you can identify. You feel as if you’ve “fallen off the truck”. You once were a healthy person, but now your body is in open rebellion. You feel older than you are, and you aren’t sure if you will ever feel good again. Maybe you have just been through a season of life where taking care of yourself was not the primary focus. Someone else’s needs came first. As women, we can hardly avoid going through at least one season of life just like this. It’s not just women, though. I know my husband temporarily abandoned caring for himself. He was just as knee-deep in kiddos as I was. We were in survival mode. Many, I think, can sympathize in one way or another. If, however, you haven’t yet fallen off the truck, you probably know someone who has. That person probably really needs a friend about now. Maybe you can be that friend.<br />
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When Viki and I held our meetings in 2006, both of us acknowledged that getting out of the house was a “narrow escape”. We often left crying babies, tired husbands, and a heck-of-a mess in our wake. But, we both really needed a friend! We each had three small children at the time. I had birthed three little girls in three years. Viki had a two-year-old son when she added fraternal twins to her family. We had spent the better part of five years completely given over to the needs of producing, nursing, and caring for the round-the-clock needs of helpless human beings. We had not slept much. We had not taken much time for our own needs. We were totally in love with our babies. But, we were totally wiped out. It seemed like no matter how hard we tried to get on top of things, we just couldn’t. <br />
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I wondered, “What am I doing wrong?” I kept trying to come at the problem from a practical standpoint. What if I just adjusted our schedule? What if I did things a different way? Still, I felt overwhelmed. Over time, that feeling of being overwhelmed morphed into strange physical symptoms. I had numbness and tingling in my limbs, migraine headaches, tremors in my hands, flu-like achiness, stomach ailments, and terrible fatigue. Alarmed doctors sent me for a battery of tests including brain MRI’s and blood tests. I saw a neurologist, a gastroenterologist, and a rheumatologist. None of them could find anything. I was relieved and frustrated all at the same time. Thank God, I did not have some of the problems the doctors were looking for…but I still felt very sick. This went on for 6 months. During that time, I began to experience panic attacks. Once, I was at the grocery store and suddenly my heart began to race. I felt like I could not breathe. The world seemed to swirl around me, and I had to have a friend pick me up and drive me home. Another time, I had the same experience in a bouncy place while watching all three of my kids. I was terrified and wondered if I was still competent to care for my own children. <br />
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This trend finally landed me in the emergency room twice in two days. I literally woke up one night from a dead sleep with my heart beating out of my chest. There was no logical precursor. I had not been worrying or thinking about anything specific. It was physiological. I felt like I was having a heart attack. I thought I was going to die. What was up?! This time, my mother happened to be in town to help me. When they finally called my name in the ER, they informed me that I could only take one person back with me. I looked at my husband and my mother. I was torn. I wanted my husband, but I needed my mommy! My mother followed me back, and I prayed Bryan would forgive me later. My mom practically yelled at the doctors (which was what I felt I needed), “There is something wrong with my daughter, and we are not leaving until you find out what it is!” The ER doctor looked at me and said, “Have you consulted with a psychiatrist?” I wanted to punch him in the face. “I am NOT CRAZY!” I shouted at him.<br />
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Despite our best efforts to assert ourselves, my mother and I, escorted by my sweet, patient husband, walked out of the ER still without a diagnosis. As we sat on the couch at home, my mother fed me canned peaches. I was too weak to feed myself. At the end of my rope, I decided to try the psychiatrist. It was one of the best decisions I ever made. <br />
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To my surprise, the psychiatrist had the answers I needed. She kept helping me pursue other diagnostic tests to make sure there was not another organic cause for my symptoms while she addressed what she could. I will admit her methods seemed a bit experimental, but in hind sight, I wouldn’t change a thing. What I discovered during that time was very valuable: brain chemistry messes with your whole body. Here I was, a trained social worker who was supposed to offer every individual dignity, and I still thought going to a psychiatrist meant you were “crazy”. I had a good “book knowledge” of mental health issues, but I clearly did not understand the impact of brain chemistry on overall well-being. What I experienced had little to do with what I thought about things. I didn’t think myself into this place. And, I couldn’t pray myself out. In fact, I couldn’t even access my coping skills. I was physically sick. Sure, my emotional health was affected. My spiritual health was affected. It was all haywire because my body was sick.<br />
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For me, medicine was a big part of the cure. I know that is not the case for everyone. I was skeptical as they come. I didn’t want to become dependent on medicine for the rest of my life. And, by the grace of God, I do not need the medicine today. That is not everyone’s story, but it is mine. As I was beginning my medicine, a rheumatologist I saw gave me this advice that still rings in my ears: “You don’t have an autoimmune disorder. Don’t ever let a doctor tell you that you do. Your symptoms are similar, though. Make sure you are breathing deeply. Get lots of sleep. Drink more water. Eat right. And, exercise. Most of my patients don’t feel like exercising, but they will feel better if they do.” Though I thought he must be over-simplifying things, I followed his advice. And, he was dead on. I had forgotten how to breathe (silly as it sounds). And, even when I felt achy, I got moving. It was counter-intuitive. I was tired. Wouldn’t exercise make me more tired? Nope. Instead, it gave me energy. In combination with medicine, these few things “the doctor ordered” steadily improved my health.<br />
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When Audrey died a year later, I was devastated. But, I was equipped to handle things mentally, emotionally, and spiritually because I was no longer physically sick. My friends were worried it would send me over the edge. But, by then I knew better. It was clear to me then, and only then, how much of my problem in 2006 was physiological. And, I was keenly aware of how it all tied together—body, mind, and spirit. <br />
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Viki’s story is similar, but not the same. After having her twins, she did not recover the way she thought she would. She kept trying to blame her health issues on the mounting responsibilities of motherhood and her workload. And, so did many around her. In fact, some key people in her life even blamed her for her declining health. She began sleeping 14 hours a day. She gained a lot of weight, which was uncharacteristic of her. She felt horrible. And, she was very discouraged. As she got sicker, she missed more and more of what was going on with her children. Her loving husband stepped in to help. What neither of them knew was that her thyroid had quit on her. Kaput. By the time she figured it out, she was near death’s door, really. You need your thyroid to live. <br />
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Like me, Viki visited a barrage of doctors. She finally ended up in the excellent care of a skilled endocrinologist. It was a long, hard road, though. She had to fire a few docs along the way. She had to advocate for herself (even defend herself)—in the medical arena and in her own circle of family and friends. She lost a lot of time with her children along the way. She still grieves what “might have been” during those years. It wasn’t what she bargained for during their baby and toddler years. But, by God’s grace, good medical intervention, and support from her husband and a few loyal friends, she has emerged on the other side of this crisis a much happier, healthier person.<br />
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In January of last year, Viki and I switched our meeting place from the bench at Chili’s to the treadmill at the gym. We have been meeting each other on weekdays at 8 a.m. sharp ever since. I lost 20 pounds and got stronger as I cried out, punched out, and ran out my troubles. Once Viki’s thyroid worked again, she was able to drop about 40 pounds in a few short months, too. And, we didn’t have to starve ourselves. We helped each other find healthy recipes. Sometimes we fed our families together. And, we kept moving, even when we didn’t feel like it. Viki got so healthy again that she unexpectedly got pregnant with number four! We are confident that it was God’s plan, after healing her body, to use this tiny one (due in May) to heal her heart as well. God’s just good like that.<br />
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You see, sometimes we “fall off of the truck” through no fault of our own. Maybe we are doing our best to take care of ourselves, and we still get sick. Sometimes, we neglect our own care because we are focusing on other people or other pursuits. Those pursuits might be noble ones. Yet, our bodies suffer—and thus our spirits. And, sometimes, if we are honest with ourselves, we get a little bit sedentary and overindulge in foods that aren’t good for us. Bad habits form over time without our even noticing. We wake up one day and feel really sluggish and discouraged about life, and we didn’t even see it coming. I think that, for most of us, we can attribute our waning health to a combination of these things.<br />
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No matter the cause, those of us who find ourselves dumped off on the side of the road need some triage! We need some support. And, we need some hope that someday we might feel stronger again. I shared my story and my friend Viki’s story because I think some of you need to know you are not alone. I believe that having a health crisis in your child-bearing years is common because I have countless other friends who have been through something very similar. No one warned us!! It’s not just the child-bearing years, though. There are many other stages of life when a health crisis is likely to rear its ugly head. As I watch other people around me tumbling over like dominoes, I can’t help but want to offer some cheerleading to get them to the other side. <br />
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Some of you need to be encouraged to keep pursuing a solution to your personal health crisis. Some of you who have devoted all of your energy toward the care of others need to be inspired to turn some of your energy toward yourself again and begin healing what has been neglected. And, some of you need to know you don’t have to feel this way forever. You are, in fact, 30 (40, 50, or 60), for example, and not 100! <br />
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In short, if you are still breathing, God is not done with you yet! Your health matters to Him. It was part of His perfect plan that your body be in working order. He made your body and spirit to work in harmony with one another. We live, of course, in a world that is fallen. And, until we get to Heaven, we will contend with health issues. We might fall off the truck every once and a while. But, we can understand how God made us, know that He wants us to do our best to take care of ourselves, and work toward restoration of our health as long as He gives us breath. There is hope for YOU today if you have fallen off of the truck. <br />
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Read along next week as we shift our focus from ourselves to God’s Word as we learn how God made our bodies and our spirits to work together. I think you will be challenged and encouraged--for yourself and for the friends you support.Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-198524950465283158.post-26385355217440737002011-01-27T11:12:00.002-06:002011-02-17T11:35:37.974-06:00Dem Bones<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK_cOpPh6YPito-TaueA0mFVyh3tBfhOP6xbNRQl67kcWVeOoJBYAPlcHo-AfdTXgNIpBaSPyUNzCCy2TFkoDJvFXRaKHQvZVaEerFEg5DMqN4DIq-Qihw4C1YulTd2ZnVfk5Pol3CR035/s1600/running.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" s5="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK_cOpPh6YPito-TaueA0mFVyh3tBfhOP6xbNRQl67kcWVeOoJBYAPlcHo-AfdTXgNIpBaSPyUNzCCy2TFkoDJvFXRaKHQvZVaEerFEg5DMqN4DIq-Qihw4C1YulTd2ZnVfk5Pol3CR035/s1600/running.jpg" /></a></div>In first grade, Mary Claire came home with a purple poetry folder. She loved to recite one of her favorites: “Dem Bones.” You’ve heard it before…♫ “Dem bones, dem bones, dem dry bones…the hip bone’s connected to the knee bone, the knee bone’s connected to the ankle bone, the ankle bone’s connected to the foot bone…we have 206 bones.”♪ I loved the way Mary Claire could divide the word “bone” into about three or four syllables! Thank you, Texas! Yee-haw!<br />
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That poem (especially Mary Claire’s rendition) is funny, but it also gets me thinking…you know, dem bones are connected to much more than dem other bones. Dem bones are connected to dem hearts and dem minds, too! God made it that way. We all know it, or we wouldn’t feel so mentally and emotionally sluggish come January 1st after two months of abusing our bodies through the holidays with overeating and stressful busyness. Whether we want to admit it or not, our bodies need a little of our attention so the rest of us can keep on keepin’ on.<br />
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January is a time when many of us think about going to the gym…literally. Most of us just <em>think</em> about going to the gym! There are those, though, who will start off on the right foot. They will begin to exercise and eat better, but two weeks later they want to throw in the proverbial (gym) towel. A friend told me she heard on the radio that it was scientifically proven that January 17th was the saddest day of this year. Why? Most people are dealing with post-holiday blues. Nothing to look forward to, it is dreary outside, and besides, by mid-month, we’ve already blown our New Year’s Resolutions. That kind of stuff can surely leave us in the dumps. God knows I understand. For a person who needs her vitamin D, has struggled with clinical depression, and has legitimate real-life reasons to feel sad, January and February are always challenging. I fight my winter blues with a surefire “cocktail”: lots of prayer, blazing fires in the fireplace, scented candles, bright lightbulbs, cozy blankets and--thanks to a huge change in my perspective--a healthy diet, and EXERCISE. I’ve been the thinker (not the do-er) <em>and</em> the quitter before, but taking care of myself is no longer a New Year’s Resolution for me. It’s a lifestyle. Dese bones gotta keep dis mind in check!<br />
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Last year I observed first-hand the difficulty people have keeping the promise to get healthy. I had been going to the gym myself for just over a year consistently. I already had a routine, so I kept doing what I had been doing. I watched as the traffic increased in the parking lot of the gym on January 2nd. A few times, I had to wait for a machine. But, by March 1st, things were back to normal. Most of those new people had quit by then. I’m not making fun of them. I’ve been there…over and over. It is so hard to make a change in life, isn’t it?<br />
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When it came to health and fitness, in order to make a <em>lasting</em> change, I needed a shift not only in my behavior but in my <em>thinking</em>. A real paradigm shift. I will be the first to admit that my motivation in the past has been vain. In high school, as I was developing physically and hormonally, I began putting on weight for the first time in my life. I had been a gymnast as a child, and I knew what it was like to be in shape. I liked feeling strong. But, as my physical activity decreased and my metabolism changed, I began struggling with my weight. I am sure now that I did the wrong thing in response. I started drastically reducing my calories. I remember taking a bagel and a banana to school for lunch for about two years straight. I am lucky I didn’t struggle with an eating disorder. All my friends were following the latest fad diet, namely the no-fat one. Everyone scrapped the good stuff like healthy oils and low-fat proteins for the standard fare of the day: Snackwells cookies. That was stellar nutrition, ladies. (What did they make those things out of anyway?) And, so began my lifelong love/hate relationship with food.<br />
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I don’t think I will ever completely remove the struggle from my life, but now that I am older, I am not looking at my physical health in the same way I did when I was 18. Sure, it is nice to try on clothes and have them actually fit me. And, it is nice to feel pretty. But, I want to testify to you how AWESOME it is to feel powerful and positive about my life because of my health! I want to tell you how much more equipped I feel to do what God made me to do because I don’t feel sick anymore. I want you to know that you can be more prepared to cope with the emotional and spiritual challenges of life—however devastating they are—when you are taking care of your physical body. And, most of all, I want to tell you why I have begun to see taking care of myself as an important part of my relationship with God. <br />
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Before I delve any deeper into this subject, let me first make a few disclaimers. Most of us (especially women) have had some struggles with weight in our lifetime. We have wrestled with body image at one time or another. And, there are those out there who are battling with an eating disorder. For all intents and purposes, I will not be primarily discussing weight management, body image, or eating disorders here...at this time. By the mere mention of physical health, I don’t want to heap condemnation on anyone or make anyone feel like they have somehow failed. I also don’t want to proclaim that I somehow have this all figured out. What I <em>do</em> want to do is tell you what God is teaching me about how our bodies and our spirits are meant to work together and how if we surrender it all to Him, He can bring about some victory in our lives we have not yet seen! Do you want that victory as much as I do? I have discovered that if we want <em>spiritual victory</em>, we must not ignore the <em>physical disciplines</em> of life. We must be intentional about taking care of ourselves.<br />
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Before you throw a brick at your computer screen, let me assure you I am not just another person ringing the New Year bell telling you to go on a diet and put on your running shoes so that you can be a good little Christian. In the past I have been prone to disregard someone’s words if they even <em>hinted</em> that there was a list of things I should be doing to make my Christian life perfect. Yuck! I detest legalism. Thinking like that heaps guilt. And, sister, we’ve got enough of that to go around already. Hear me: God is much more gentle and patient than that. He doesn’t condemn. He convicts. He doesn’t push. He pulls.<br />
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God spoke to me about my health in the same way he speaks to me about everything else…quietly, persistently, and lovingly. When it was time, God whispered to me. “I’ve got something great around the corner over here. Want to see what it looks like? Will you follow me here? I think you’ll be glad you did.” When God talks sweet like this to me, one word comes to mind: revelation! He is about to reveal something new to me. Just when I think I’ve got things figured out, He decides to show me something deeper, something more challenging—something with greater <em>reward</em>. I truly believe He is inspiring me to discuss this topic with you because--for some of you--it is time to walk around that next corner.<br />
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If you hear God’s voice beckoning you to get curious enough to peek at what He just might have waiting for you, then join me over the next few weeks on a journey to explore how your physical health is related to your overall health and even your effectiveness in your Christian life. Often, the new thing God holds around the corner requires that I change a bit. Sometimes that is uncomfortable, but when the invitation comes from God, it is always worth it to follow! Dem bones of yours deserve it! Will you come along?<br />
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During the next month, we will look at:<br />
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o <strong>“Falling off the Truck”</strong> (exploring the sometimes unforeseeable pitfalls that cause us to ignore our bodies)<br />
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o <strong>“The Dust of the Ground and the Breath of Life”</strong> (recognizing the God-ordained relationship between your body and your spirit)<br />
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o <strong>“Plato, Pop Culture, and You”</strong> (restoring the balance between the spiritual and the physical in our lives)<br />
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o <strong>“Getting Back on Track”</strong> (discovering how God can help us prioritize our health again)<br />
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Blessings until next time!Sarah Moranhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09034908227705634563noreply@blogger.com2